Want to Stop Breastfeeding My 16 Month Old Daughter!

I just weaned my daughter at 15 months (she is now 16 months) and she nursed all day and night. We did do the co-sleeping and whenever she wanted to nurse she could. I didn't have help to quit nursing so I decided to go cold turkey. It was a very hard week but honestly it took about 5 days for her to get the jist that she isn't getting the boob. I offered her a sippy everytime she went for the boob or I distracted her. My boobs were I think the worst part of it but I had several people tell me to try cabbage leaves on them (raw cabbage leaves) and it actually took the engorgement away which is what I was hoping for. I did take her out of my bed and into her crib. For the first couple of nights I offered her a sippy of water everytime she woke up. After about 2 nights she would wake up once during the night and wimper.I wouldn't go to her if she just wimpered and she would fall asleep within 5-10 minutes. After a week she was sleeping through the night and now a month later is still sleeping through the night. Now she will still try to nurse from time to time almost like she forgets we aren't doing that anymore. But honestly, if I were to do it again I would go cold turkey. Get it done and have only one hard week instead of several hard weeks.

I would say work on night weaning first. Then gradually cut down on morning or after work feeds. Start by giving her water instead of breast feeds during the night. Start on a weekend or some time you can stand to lose some sleep. When I did this with my son, we got down to just a morning feed and a before bed feed within a month. Then you drop one of those feeds. After she's used to that, you should be able to let the last feed drop. Hopefully, she'll lose interest but if she's like my son, you'll have to make it through some tears. Good Luck!

My son was the same way at that age (he's 19 months old now and still nurses 1x/day). I suggest you work on night-weaning her first. Probably the easiest way to do this is to physically separate her from you at night. I find that my son often asks for milk out of bordom, habit, or simply because it's there. Can you put her in a crib next to your bed? Lots of great tips on night-weaning at www.mothering.com/discussions - lots of parents there co-sleep and breastfeed their babies, so they've all been there/done that.

For day-time nursing (ie after daycare) - I say indulge her for a little while longer until you take care of the night feedings. It's her way of snuggling and being close to you after a long day away. As she gets older (ie in the next couple months) you shouldn't have much trouble using distraction as a method of getting her to drop that feeding. The world is an itneresting place, and if you can find something she really likes to do (in addition to a cup full of something extra good - chocolate milk or juice or whatever "treat" you can find to replace nursing) she won't protest too much. I found with my son that we could skip some afternoons, but not all. It's just been during the last 2 weeks or so that we've managed to go every day without an after-work nursing.

Good luck!

First of all I want to tell you how much I respect your situation, you truly have your hands full!!
Many women in your situation would have given up b/f a long time ago.

I too have a 16 mo old who is addicted to his momma's breast!
I have been talking with people and reading a lot and I have decided that it would be best for my son to stop cold turkey. Weaning would be much harder on him especially since I have been feeding on demand rather than following a schedule. That case he won't be confused as when to the buffet is closed or when it is open.

I must be honest though, I have not yet found the courage to actually set a date because I think it will be very hard on all of us.

Try to find a substitute way to bond at the end of the day (which is the reason she wants to BF when you get home) and always offer that first. If you can get a hold of "How Weaning Happens" it can be of great help. It's a La Leche League book. I have no advice for the nighttime nursing:(

Good Luck:)

I nursed my daughter until she was almost three and now my son is headed down that same path. He is 16 months old and he wants to nurse all the time. He co-sleeps with my husband and me and during the day if he falls down or just needs mom he tries to nurse. I have been nursing for almost 4 1/2 years straight and I recently got diagnosed with thyroid problems. I think my body is too depleted. I think nursing is wonderful but it does take it's toll on our bodies. I want to quit nursing my son- my daughter just weaned herself because I let her do it that way, but with my son since I don't want to nurse until 2 or 2 1/2 I'm going to quit cold turkey. I think the advice of the mother who went cold turkey is the best. It is probably very hard at first but then you're done! Thanks for the good advice. In my experience letting them determine the road drags the process out much, much longer because naturally most kids probably want to just keep nursing. Also, I think co-sleeping is almost impossible when trying to quit. I'm going to have my husband sleep with him and I'll move into the spare bedroom for a couple of weeks.

Thanks!

As a lactation consultant here are a couple of things to consider. Are you going to stop co sleeping? Do you really want to quit nursing all together or just the nightime feedings? Do you have any idea what a post bf breast is like :))) that's a joke of course. Really...the nursing thru the night and cosleeping (are wonderful) but will be very tied into the nursing. Without a partner to help distract at night, the night weaning will be hard not impossible to do without a different sleeping arrangement. You basically have 2 options. 1-cold turkey change everything at once.hard for week or so but done. Start on a monday because she is already at daycare so there is less time with you. LOTS of distraction involved. The 2- is don't offer don't refuse, any time she wants to nurse offer a cup/toy/game/book whatever...leaving the night nursings as the last to get rid of. Hope this gives you a good start. Also, Dr Sears's website has a good article on weaning from night nursing while still cosleeping.

I would not do cold turkey. But honestly if she has nursed this long I think it is usually hard to make a child this age wean if they don't want to. Might be easier to do when she is around 2.

I would start the night weaning first. There is an excellent book by Elizabeth Pantley called "the no cry sleep solution". I used it to help get my son to sleep through the night when he was bt 12-14 months, cause his issue was that he would want to wake up and nurse. I worked full time as well so it was his time with me, kwim? What I did is that I would nurse him before bed and put him down in his crib. When he woke at night to nurse, I would usually bring him in to co sleep. But, what you do with the process of night weaning is you let them nurse, but only for a very very short time. You have to stay awake and alert while you are doing this. You notate what time he/she woke up and how long you nurse. If they start fussing/rooting for more, you nurse again, but this time for a shorter amount of time, and continue doing that making the time shorter and shorter. This way you are not completely abandoning them...you are still co sleeping. But after a while, they start to understand that they are not really goign to get what they want. After a few days of this, my son just stopped waking up to nurse and slept through the night in his crib. It might be a little harder or longer since you cosleep the whole night but I bet it would work. Then once the night weaning is done, you can start trying to skip the before bed/after work nursings (depending on which one you think would be easiest for her to get rid of). Do the distraction stuff...tell her there is no more milk, that she is a big girl, etc. It may take some time, but if you do it gradually it will be much easier on both of you.

My daughter was that old when I had the same problem, except I was with her all day too. She wasn't interested in nursing during the day, she wanted to nurse every two hours at night. My doctor told me to just stop her cold. Nurse her once at night and once in the early morning for a while, but not every two hours. I had the advantage of having her in a crib at the time, so I would just give her a sippy cup with water and a pacifier (which she never used) and laid her back down. With the smell of milk so close I'm not sure how that would work, but it might be worth a try. You might try giving her a sippy cup of milk when you get home and still snuggling her and doing the same routing as nursing as she might just want the security of you. Hope this helps.