What to Do for Baby Loss

I received a very special necklace.
I never take it off.
Mine is a simple heart from James Avery with the date inscribed on the reverse and I hold it often & "speak" to the baby. It's my only physical connection and I am grateful to have it. I thought I lost it once and I just knew I was going to die all over again.
Typing this now my throat is constricting, tears are in my eyes.
It's very personal and painful. But I wanted you to know how grateful I am to have something tangible for me to touch instead of a child to hold.

When I miscarried, I read a book called A Silent Sorrow. It helped me SO much! We also planted a tree for that baby.
A nice gift would be a memory box. I saved all the sympathy cards, ultrasound pictures, baby blankets, etc that were given to me.
Do you know the baby's name? It would be name to have baby's name engraved on something.

Oh, I am so sorry. I've suffered such a loss before and it broke our hearts. Is there a Christian/religious store in your area? Perhaps a special book dedicated to loss may help. (I just googled the subject and found this book: Empty Cradle, Broken Heart (Surviving the Death of Your Baby - ) Author: Deborah L. Davis

Or perhaps an angel necklace for the mother? I was comforted by knowing that my little angel will be waiting for me up in Heaven. Peace to you and your friends...

You could think of making a donation to the March of Dimes in their name or the babys name. Better yet start a team and start raising money in the community and walk for the memory of the sweet child. you can find an event in your area by following the link. My mother lost a son after a month of life. he was born at 24 weeks. I walk every year for the little ones that have passed and for the ones that refuse to give up. and for the parents that love them no matter what happens.
http://www.marchforbabies.org/default.aspx

When I had our ectopic pregnancy, I was devastated. My mother in law gave me a necklace with an angel and a baby angel on it. Also, my sister gave me a precious moments figurine that is a baby boy sleeping on a cloud. It means so much to me still. I keep the necklace in my car so that I can look at every day, and the figurine is kept on a shelf in my 2 year old's room as her sort of "guardian angel".
My hearts go out to that family and I will keep them in my prayers.

There is a super helpful book called "Grieving the child I never knew" . It's Christian and has a rubber ducky (or at least yellow) on the front of it. I've given it to many people and they spoken quite highly of how God has used it to minister to them. The author is Kathe Wunnenberg

I've always loved blankets - maybe have everyone at church decorate a square w/ a bible verse or note and have someone make it into a quilt...that would be a sweet keepsake

I've also given (and received) crystal vases from people upon the loss of a loved one. It's nice bc the vase acts as a keepsake even after the flowers die

When I was diagnosed with cancer after the birth of my daughter, I received a few pieces of jewelry with Biblical verses on them that really helped me through.

Honestly, it's knowing that people are thinking about you that is the most important thing. Time will heal their loss, but knowing that people still care about them (months after this) will be the greatest gift you can give them.

People want to help so desperately in times of need, but we often forget to help in times when that need has passed. I found I has so many friends I didn't know about during chemo, but they're all out of the picture now that I'm well.

Friendship is tangible and forever!
Thanks for being a kind, dear friend to this family.

It sounds like you've gotten some pretty great ideas. I'd like to throw one more out there for you. When my nephew and his wife lost their baby girl at birth, I found an artist who will create a memorial sculpture for your baby. She can create a "generic" sculpture based on your description, but we had pictures of Isabella, so we sent them to her and she molded a sculpture that looks just like her. The parents were thrilled with the results. Here is the link to the site. My condolences and prayers to your friends. http://www.alexandrasangelgifts.co.uk/catalog/Sculptures-...

Oh that's so sad. There's caringmeals.com where you can set up for people to bring them food where they are. Just keep in touch with them; that's the most important thing. It's too late this time, but there is an organization called www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org that matches families where the infant isn't expected to live with photographers that will take pictures of their baby with the family for free. At least then they get some photos of their baby and some remembrance of the tiny life that never came home. Contributions to a charity in their name, after asking them what charity they want, is good. Just keep talking to them, sending her notes, and don't expect responses all the time either. Our friends lost their 2-year-old last year and I'm just telling you what we did for them.

M.,
My sister lost her boys (triplets) 9 years ago when they were born too early after just a few hours. We planted a tree in her yard and got a stone with the boys names on it. She finds this place very peaceful and has a place where she can spend time with her boys while watching the other children play as well. She also has a cedar box that has a few special things (blankets, first photos, hospital braclets, cards, etc). You could very easily have your church rasie the money for this and then get ahold of a nursery in their new town to plant the tree as well as have someone in your church make the box. A memorial plate could be added with her sons name before sending it.

How awful. There just is no easy way to lend support to people far away, if they are local everyone knows what to do...casserole brigade, babysitting, getting them out to a park or a movie to decompress. Maybe put together something like a basket of cookies from the ladies in the parish, maybe some sort of gift card if you can find a good local vendor for them, and of course something for the little one, like a gift card to build a bear or something fun she can do and have a keepsake for later.