You all seem to have such great ideas, I am hoping that you can help. My BIL is about 37, doesn't like sports, but does fish, hunt, golf. He likes "manly" things and hates sitting around with the women-folk. My sister, BIL, niece, and mom are all coming up for about 6 days for Thanksgiving. We had told him that you can usually still golf at this time and my husband found a place to go skeet shooting. My husband is pretty much giving himself over to entertain my BIL (bless him, as he is quite arrogant, and hard to take for extended periods). We just found out that it is supposed to be record lows next week (single digit lows, and they are coming from 80 degrees!). I'm thinking that golf is out, my husband isn't so sure about the skeet shooting either. I had thought that he could spend some time fishing, but I think that will be too cold for him now too.
I had originally thought, screw it. We aren't here to be your entertainment, you are here for a visit. But, they are driving 14 hours, and staying in our house, so probably good to keep everyone as happy as possible. Does anyone have any suggestions? I know that not everyone is from this area, so maybe just some generic suggestions could spark some ideas for me too. Thank you all for your help.
Update - The projects are a good idea, and that is what we have done at my grandmother's house in the past, but we don't have anything that needs to be fixed, and my husband hates to be the "assistant" to my BIL in his own house. I might look into the playground equipment. Not sure we can afford it, but not sure we can afford the insanity either. :)
Oh, and my sister is no help. At their house, all he does is go use the tractor (we don't have one), he he goes off with the man-folk to do the aforementioned things, or goes fishing.
Thank you everyone. I have told my husband some of the suggestions. Unfortunately, they won't let you golf around here if it is below freezing, and HE doesn't want to go shooting if it is like 20 degrees either. He said that his plan is to give my BIL 2 things to do, and then he can fend for himself - he has a GPS and can find Cabella's. The car situation will be interesting though. :)
We may also all try to go bowling one time, and my husband would like to see our son try iceskating for the first time, so my BIL will either be at Cabella's or with us. When I started thinking about the time, it is really only Tuesday and Wednesday. And I do keep going back to yes, he is a grown man and can entertain himself. I think I am just trying to arm my husband if he is caught in the middle. Plus, I don't want it to be too awful for my BIL, or they won't come up again.
Thanks so much!!
Sounds like this is a good time for BIL to grow up and for everyone to stop pandering to what he likes and dislikes!
How about sending the guys out for an afternoon of laser tag or paintball? Get those hunting juices flowing, without freezing their butts off(although most don't seem to mind). also, there are plenty of games for adults and older kids. When we visit my MIL (she's 90), we always play games with 6-8 adults, and we have a ball.
I was also going to suggest a 'shopping trip' to a Caballa's or Pro Bass Shop. Even if your husband doesn't need anything, it will get your BIL out of the house for the day and give him something to look at that he is interested in.
At the very worst, set him up in your family room or den with a sandwich and a bag of chips and turn the TV onto the fishing and hunting channel! I agree that it will most likely be more pleasant for everyone if you can have stuff set up for him to do, but he IS a grown up and shouldn't expect to be entertained every minute like a little kid, lol!
I'm sure just a day trip to a local Cabella's or Outdoor World or something like that would be nice. The building something idea sounds great. They can always go bowling or play some pool.
I am sorry but I would go back to your original thought of "screw it". This is a grown man who can be responsible for his own entertainment. Give him a bunch of resources of what there is to do in your area and let him make up his own entertainment. If he gets bored or grumpy, kindly remind him that he's an adult, there is plenty of things to do, and while he is your guest, you expect him to be polite. Maybe have your sister do this intead....
We visit our in-laws in a retirement community once a year and frankly, it isn't our idea of fun either. But they are family and we visit because we love them and while we are there, we take their lead and do what they enjoy. I feel that as adults we should be able to control our "wants" and preferences for 3 days and go with the flow.
Good luck!
Do you have a WII? My hubby hunts and loves the WII hunting games. They're fun, the kids & I like them too. They come with a rifle and all, dh and his hunting buddies can disappear for hours in our media room playing the various hunting games we have.
Your husband is probably prepared for the cold weather but I would definitely take hardy man out any way and see what happens. Fishermen still fish in cold weather they just catch different things.
check the website for your town or a city close to you. They always have wonderful suggestions for tourists there and even places a local would know existed because it really is for the out of towner. Perhaps there is an indoor firing range, or indoor paint ball place. My hubby enjoys bowling for fun and may the guys could do that or everyone could. It's great fun with the kids when there are bumpers on the lanes for the kids and none for the adults. We usually get a minimum of two lanes.
I'm no much for out doors. If your BIL is competitive perhaps some card or board games too. Old favorites like Monopoly, Life, Uno, Scrabble are all fun and the kids could join in depending on how old they are. Make the most of it. Have fun. It's your holiday too. You have so much to be thankful for.
First of all, I think you are very kind to be so concerned about your BIL's stay with you. I used to have a BIL that I felt like I needed to entertain and at first we did. Eventually we ran out of ideas and he began to find his own things to do. He'd take off for a couple hours and go find a shooting range, or go shopping at the sporting goods store, go to a movie, go clean his truck, etc. Maybe plan 1 or 2 things for "the boys" but you should also let him do his own thing.
What about hunting? Since he's driving, he can bring his rifle and gear. If there's a hunting preserve anywhere near you -he could go there. You would be surprised -people who really love to hunt will go out in single digit weather to do so! He could donate any kills to local homeless shelters or food banks.
Do people in Idaho ice fish? I know it's popular in places like Wisconsin and Minnesota. He might enjoy that as a change of pace. Indoor shooting ranges could be fun for an afternoon too.
Other than that -you're right -it's really not your job to make sure he's entertained 24/7. He's a grown up, so he needs to suck it up if it's too cold to do what he enjoys. There are hunting, fishing and golf channels on tv!
Meh. I'd let him fend for himself. Do you have a Wii? If so, throw him at it :)
Okay, I don't know if this will fly but how about setting your husband and your BIL with some manly project that they can do together while he is here. Something like building a wooden playset for the kids (I know, costly but just trying to think of ideas) or maybe a greenhouse or shed. A friend of mine had told me that our local Lowe's or Home Depot had a pretty large greenhouse kit that you could purchase for about $100.
I think that if your BIL and husband have a project that they can work on together, that will give them some male bonding time and keep your BIL from becoming too bored.
Good luck with the visit.
let your husband take him fishing and push your BIL in the water! Just kidding. Are there any kind of indoor recreation in your area? Like an indoor driving range. Or shoot, laser tag. Then your hubby can take out some (much needed??) aggression in him in a fun way. Look for anything that will keep them active and busy. Maybe even see if a friend or neighbor needs help with a project.
Why don't you ask the BIL before you decide the temps will be to low.
Funny..golf & skeet shooting are what my husband does with visiting man relatives :)
The paint ball is a good idea...how about cards? Our families play a LOT of card games when we get together. Look up the rules to the card game "Golf" or "Ten Pennies"...both a LOT of fun with a large group. The game RISK is really popular with the men too and that takes about 6 hours to play :)
Does he do puzzles? Maybe get a huge puzzle and set up a table where people can sit and work on it when they feel like it.
Bogus Creek Outfitters has a sleigh ride dinner you could ALL do. Have you taken him to the Air Museum yet? (yes, I googled...I'm bored!). In addition to man things, try to find stuff the whole group can do...the key is to keep busy!
As a last resort, take all the women shopping and leave the kids home with the guys :) That will keep him busy!
Tell the arrogant BIL to get out of his manly box and try something new. Geez at 37 I'm surprised that he doesn't want to try new things in his live. Throw him in the kitchen and tell him to cook up a mean meal for all the women folk that are just sitting around.
Okay, how about having easy access to board games that can be played by two or more people. Cards, he can always play solitary games. Computer time, video games.
Tell him to get some long johns and let him borrow one of your hubbies coats and send him on his way. You can still golf and fish in the cold. If he is as big of a pain as you say, he will be happy to get outside and play. Or he can be miserable inside. His choice. Good luck.
Your sis probably knows exactly how to handle him. Tell her you are trying to come up with some ideas for the guys and need her help and it is about them.
Cold weather wouldn't keep my husband from golfing--and hunting is mainly done in the cold weather, so I don't see the problem--just tell him to pack his woolies!
You can send the guys to the park with the kids for a few hours to play, have him deep fry some meat or something! LOL
I like the idea for visiting Cabellas, what about an indoor golf range?
- Most sporting good stores have "cages" to practice golf swings..
- All go out to see a movie
- Pretend your husband is interested in purchasing a tractor and let them go scope them out?
This is tough b/c first thought is... he's an adult let him find things to do!
