If someone had a religion that you did not know much about but possibly thought it was weird or had heard bad stuff or rumors about (regardless of what it was) would you feel it was ok to make jokes about it or have openly critical conversations with them about it or demand explanations from them about their beliefs and practices?
I am curious, it is a long story.
Thanks for the responses so far. I know it is a bit of an "obvious" question. I ask because my in-laws have always disagreed with my religion. My hubby and I met 14 years ago at our church. My in laws have actually been vehemently in disagreement, vocally so and have only recently, toned down about it. They still seem to feel if god forbid, the subject comes up, it is ok to demand answers to certain things (mind you, they don't actually want to hear anyone else's information, their mind is made up already, it is more of a belittling point of view).
My husband has had a ton of conversations with them about this. To not really much end.
They "know" (despite having no actual first hand knowledge, while hubby and I have a ton).
I may post a second question about this.
To answer a couple of points I've seen of course any "religion" using their beliefs to commit illegal acts such as child molestation and exploitation of women has no right to practice. That is not a "religion" that is criminal.
To the Rick Ross warning site, I can see the point of view here, however I will let you know from personal experience, sometimes some people have convinced themselves something is a certain way and don't listen to someone else's point of view or personal insights, because they are "sure" it fits into those warning signs based on some misinformation.
Muslims have been attacked because some Muslims do crazy things. Some priests have done crazy things. Are all Catholics perverts? Some Mormons have gone into a bizarre sect of secrecy and child exploitation and abuse. Are they all like this. Of course not. Is that fundamentally, what any of these religions are about? No.
Anyways, more on this later, I appreciate the responses. I know I'm still being a little cryptic, I'll leave it at that for now...
No, I would not feel it was OK to be judgmental or make jokes or have openly critical conversations with someone's religion. If I were interested in knowing more, I'd ask questions but always in a respectful manner.
This sounds like a rhetorical question, but no, I believe that people have the freedom to worship (or not) according to the dictates of their own consciences. This means that the topic of religion is either avoided or spoken of respectfully.
Curious or confused or misinformed? Absolutely. Judgmental? Hell no. Judging someone or something before you are educated about them/it is very close minded, IMO.
Hmm. I know some people that your quesiton applies; ie: I have heard rumors, I think the rumors I have heard are weird/strange.
NO WAY would I joke about it. I don't know anything about it first-hand, so cant joke about rumors.
NO I would not demand explanations or have a big debate with them either. It's just not my style. Do I think that a big debate or conversation is going to solve anything? Will I change their mind? With they change mind? NO. So it's not worth getting people upset - as I find that bringing up religion and belifs gets people extremely upset.
I met someone when we moved to Ohio that was of a different faith background than I was. She was super nice and we had a lot of the same parenting beliefs, but I didn't want to make assumptions based upon what little I knew about her religion. So, I asked her if it was OK if I asked her questions, not a third degree thing, but to educate myself. I made sure I made that distinction. She was completely open to it. I offered to do the same thing. We had a LOT of great conversations seeing where our faith's were alike and where they were different.
I think it's wrong to judge or to demand explanations, but it's always good and wise to ask questions about what you do not know. Ignorance almost always leads to hurt feelings. People just need to ask in a way that's open and kind and with an understanding of agreeing to disagree.
Yes, I feel it's ok to be judgemental about a person's religion. However, I don't feel it's ok to make jokes or demands.
Religion is a very personal thing and some people can be very defensive about their beliefs. I believe everyone is entitled to their beliefs and they should be respected whether you agree with them or not. I also think it's a good idea to learn about other religions than your own to better understand what you may think is weird.
Well it is a normal thing, for people to stick up for what they believe. If you believe different than someone else, then there is automatically a disagreement. It doesn't always have to be a judgemental and harsh disagreement. But with religion, it is a hot topic with a lot of people, so chances are, you will get into an argument. I do not agree with the jokes and such.
I think the best answer is to tell you about a snipit on NCIS. Ziva who Isreli and a Jew was questioning a prisoner with another man (not part of the team). The prisoner was Muslim and the other man made a rude remark about the Muslim religion. Ziva grabbed him and said "when you disparage his religion you disparage my religion and all religion".
I am Wiccan and I am happy to answer any questions about my religion as long as the person asking is respectful of me and my religion.
My answer is no.
I don't want to judge anyone's religious beliefs, especially if I don't understand them.
How can I judge what I don't know?
There are two subjects that I really try to avoid at all costs.
One is religion and the other is politics.
Just my opinion.
I think it's okay to argue religion with someone, it's how some people see the light.
Nope. It's rude. I try to avoid all religion and political conversations with people, those two topics are ones that people feel so strongly about, as do I, and I really just don't want to debate. People have the right to believe and practice whatever religion they want. It doesn't bother me, I don't try to convert them to see it my way, why? For what. One of my jobs a while back I was having a 1 on 1 conversation with a Muslim guy, and he was just telling me certain things they do, and what not. I was actually intrigued, because I was raised around people who would may fun of, and talk bad about Muslim people, because they never actually knew any people who were Muslim and just stereotyped. I Aldo hear alot of talk about the polygamy couple, Yes it's illegal to be legally married to more than 1 person at a time, but their not all legally married, he's not molesting and sleeping with his kids.. What's the problem? That's their religious beliefs. Not everybody is as accepting to things that differ to them and what they grew up to believe. Same as with everything in life, some people grow up being taught that they should never whoop s child, while others swear by it, both sides are gonna think their right. Everbody is guilty of this, about something in their life, even me.. But back to your question, which I almost forgot what it was about... No.
I am of a "controversial" religion and people openly make assumptions about it, or have heard rumors about it, and comedians regularly make jokes about it.
There are several ways to handle this.
#1 Educate the person. Truth always trumps falsehoods, and most human beings can recognize truth. Most of the time you can handle the lies very simply. You can show the ridiculousness of them by asking the person WHERE they heard the rumor--was it the INTERNET? Do you believe everything you read on the internet? Was it the National Enquirer? Seriously? Sometimes it's necessary to laugh it off. "Oh, that's so funny you heard that about our religion. Aren't people ridiculous? Of course it isn't true, but people come up with the darndest things..." Handle each crazy thing with truth. "You think we believe XYZ? Well that's not entirely true, we actually believe..."
#2 Don't discuss it with the person. Why discuss something with someone who is out to attack you? Simply say "I see that we have to agree to disagree on that subject. Now, what's for dinner?" Refuse to talk about it. Eventually they will give up. Good Roads, Good Weather. Sound familiar? Talk about positive things and IGNORE the bad. When they make a bad comment, find the GOOD part in it and comment on it.
"I can't believe you still go to THAT Church."
"Speaking off Church FIL, how's the one you go to been? Do you still like your pastor?"
See--deflect, deflect, deflect!
#3 Handle yourself on the subject of your religion. My religion has a course you can take on it. Funny thing is, once I learned how to handle people on it (because I was very educated on my religion) I no longer needed to. No one's made more than one bad comment to me on it since I took the course. Funny how when I was no longer on the defensive people ceased to make comments!
Good luck!
NO!!
Religion is as old as humans. It has always been around and is constantly evolving. I think a lot of people fear what they don't understand and/or make assumptions about different beliefs. Religion is not bad, but there are people that will use it and twist it to fit their needs.
History shows us that all faiths have used it to their advantage. We currently look at Muslims and think they are all bad, but we forget that some Christians were just as bad if not worst many years ago against Muslims. I also get frustrated when people claim that Wickens or Pagans are evil, they are not.
I try not to talk with my friends about religion because everyone has a very personal relationship with their God and it will NEVER be like mine. I am okay with that! I can't really remember a time where I have joked about God, unless it was....Oops, I am going to stand over here so that when God smites you with lightening I am not hit! lol.....but to demand and be critical, nope. Not my business.
L.
I don't think it's helpful to be condescending, or critical, or joking, or sarcastic. This approach will turn a potentially open minded conversation off very quickly.
Rather, I would simply and repeatedly, ask open ended questions..."Why?...How did you come to that conclusion? Where does that come from? Can you tell me more...? etc....
Then with that kind of honest conversation, you are liable to create an environment where the person can realize in their own time that their beliefs are off centered.
The approach you describe will only create division. No one wants to be tarred and feathered into a religion. Well, maybe there some exceptions. As a friend, you would know for sure which approach would benefit all.
It's one thing to have a conversation with someone of another religion, especially if you're truly interested and are asking intelligent and respectful question. It's a whole other thing to "demand" answers, only to try to shoot them down with arguments from your OWN religion.
I've certainly had heated discussions about religion, but never with a judgmental attitude. My MIL is Catholic and my FIL is Muslim, so you can imagine, there are a lot of discussions surrounding religion in our family, some of them get *quite* interesting. But to openly make jokes or criticize...well, that's not ok. Just like I'd never judge and make jokes about someone's race or sexual preference or how long they breastfeed their child.
Each one of us is different in some way (not necessarily just religion), we should embrace that. And if someone's difference feels uncomfortable to us, we should educate ourselves so that it doesn't feel so very foreign. Making jokes and criticizing just makes that person look ignorant and uneducated, IMO.
Of course not. That would be just plain ignorant.
Generally speaking, not it's not okay. I have one major exception to a specific "religion" and I have a few nitpicks about particular denominations of Christianity. Even so, while I may feel somewhat judgmental I don't feel comfortable poking fun and I don't like to make broad judgments about the people themselves.
It's very, um, situation-specific. I'm not one that will put down or criticize other religions in order to feel better about my own. I'm very strong in my own faith, and very secure in my beliefs and my belief system and since I've spent much of my own spiritual journey studying other religions and belief systems I have great respect for them even if I disagree with them intensely.
people are judgemental of what they dont understand its human nature. i am christian and my husband is catholic so i hear a lot from him that my religion has flaws and that his religion is the right way. i just ignore him. hes mad that my daughter doesnt attend a catholic church but a christian church. i just simply tell him im not catholic and if he wants her to learn the catholic religion then he should take her and teach her i can not. i did not convert for him so we were not married in the church. i respect his religion for the fact that it was what he was taught. i also will attend a catholic church with him and respect how they do their mass and such. the only part i feel is wrog is that i can not take part in communion because i have not been baptized in the catholic church.
i have become more spiritual then religious over the years because i have my beliefs that dont fall into what the bible teaches.
NO. I think that EVERYONE has the right to their own religion/faith etc. I would NEVER make any jokes or say anything negative about anybody's faith. If I have questions, I research it myself or ask them if I feel its not to personal or inappropriate. But...I would never demand explainations about anything. If they felt like sharing or wanted to answer some questions, thats fine--but I wouldn't pressure anyone into anything---
M
