Would You Want to Hear This If You Lost a Spouse Years Ago?

I always tell my mom when I have a dream about my stepfather, gone for 6 years now. She does the same. I don't think it's that big of a deal. Tell her. Does he look young? Healthy? Happy? Tell her that too.

I personally love to hear when someone visits someone else in dreams and I know my family likes it too. I enjoy the messages or like my grandmother when she used to visit, just quietly being there in the room with us, which made me feel she was alway close.

I wouldn't because I would wonder why he hadn't appeared to me but instead a niece, and then would agonize over what the dream visits meant. and if there's no specific message from him for you to pass on...I wouldn't say a thing, just my opinion.

R.
I lost my husband 4 months ago. I would love for someone to give me a message from him. As a matter of fact, my neighbor across the street called me a month after he passed and said she dreamt of my husband. He told her to tell me he was ok and that he had not abandoned me and he was still going to take care of us. He told her that I was not open to hearing from him and that is why he came to her.
It should all be about how you relay the message. If you tell her he has tried to come to her but she is not hearing him and the only way to get her to hear him he had to go to someone that could hear and be willing to talk to her for him.
Ask her she has ever noticed things being out of place or doors open or anything that he might be trying to get her attention and she is just playing it off as something else.
Another thing R. is you have already have strange phenomena happen to you and around your house. YOU ARE THE PERFECT PERSON to get this message to his most loved wife.
You got this!!
Blessings
D.

Hi R.-

I was very close to my father. He died suddenly several years ago. He would come to me in my dreams a lot shortly after he died...He still comes now...but not nearly so often.

At first I hesitated to tell my mom about it (they were devoted to each other for almost 50 years). I finally did tell her. She shared that although she had not dreamed of him...she was finding 'pennies from heaven' in the oddest places! My mom is an impeccable house cleaner...so these were wierd to say the least. We joked that it was a shame he wasn't sending big bills! lol

Then a few years ago, my kids and I hid a $100 bill in her fridge...lol We all had a good laugh!

Your aunt may be comforted by your sharing...

Best Luck!
michele/cat

Yes, I absolutely would tell her. You are having these dreams for a reason and I truly believe that our loved ones are still "with" us at certain times/moments, even though they've passed on. He wants you to tell her and so you should. I recently had what I believe to be two messages from my deceased FIL and I did tell my MIL about them.

My wife lost her mom in September 08 (on my birthday). She and her sister have dreams about their mom, with her telling them to tell each other things and share stuff with them. Not knowing your aunt, but how you describe it, I think she would love to hear that you have had these dreams.

My father died when I was two and I have absolutely no memories of him. When I was about four month's pregnant with my first child, my father came to me in a dream and told me simply "I am taking care of you and my grandson. Everything is going to be okay." I absolutely know this was my father. I had been pondering prenatal testing and decided against it. We did not find out the gender; we had a son. When I told my mom this story, she was very happy (she never talks about my dad, by the way, so this was a nice way to be able to make him a part of welcoming the next generation....tell you aunt. ANy connection is better than no connection.

I would definetly want to know if that was me. If would make me feel good to know that he is doing ok up there :) and that he misses us.
It would make me sad, but a happy kind of sad. She will probably ball her eyes out, but even still. I think she will like hearing it.
Tell her that you are not trying to upset her, you just wanted to tell her because you feel like its so real, and its a good thing.
and if it does upset her, say I am sorry, I wont mention it again.

I would also take into account her religious preference....if she believes in angels, heaven, god, then she might be delighted to hear of your dreams...but if she doesnt believe we go anywhere after we die she might look at you like your crazy.

Good luck, but I say...dont keep something like that bottled up.

BUT!!! on the other hand I agree with 'GrammaRocks' If someone told me my husband was in there dreams, and not mine...I would be rather upset. and I would pray and question all the time why he wasnt letting me see him, and letting someone else. So maybe dont say anything! I am torn...

Sorry< i misinterpreted the question--deleted my reply because it wasn't helpful.

I think you should definitely tell her!!! I think it would actually bring much joy and peace to her. I have read several books like Heaven is for Real and 35 Minutes and Counting that are both based on true life accounts of visits with loved ones that have passed away. My dad had a heart attack several years back and speaks of a surreal moment when he was being prepped for open heart surgery and told that he only had a 50/50 chance of surviving the surgery. He said in this moment he became very aware of "other people" in the room with him besides his doctor and nurse. He said a sense of great peace came over him that whatever happened, whether he lived or died, everything was going to turn out for the best. He was not afraid. Luckily, my dad did survive and is healthier than ever. It has also given us a chance to mend our relationship that wasn't so great in my growing up years. At any rate, it gives me great comfort to know that even if our loved ones pass, they are still with us in some form and we WILL rejoin them one day in heaven.
What a great gift you have to share with your Aunt. I think she would love to hear about these experiences you have had.
Good luck and God bless!
A.

Not only should you tell her, I think you must tell her. If your uncle had told you something to tell her on his death bed you would feel a great responsibility to do so, I don't really think this is all that different.
She undoubtably thinks about him every day, you will not be reminding her to think about it.
I don't think it's about her "being OK" with his death it's about the LIFE they shared together. Maybe she's having her own dreams about him or maybe for whatever reason he wants you to reach out to her for him. Either way it isn't your choice, do as your uncle asks even if it was only in a dream.

Yes. I would want to know probably stalk you after you told me! " Um RD are you sleep yet? NO! Well you better tell everyone to go to bed because you sound exhausted" LOL!

Tell Her, you may turn the light back on and make her smile inside. It will be emotional but that is all in the Love.

I would tell her only if you 100% feel like you should. If there is an inkling of doubt, then I wouldn't say anything. Nothing will happen if you don't tell. Even if God is allowing him to speak to you in a dream, your uncle has no control, only God does and He won't play games with you and cause something to happen or anything. He won't be mad. Your dreams may also be your way of dealing with his death. But either way, I'd go with your gut feeling on this. That is the way you should go. Good luck to you!

I lost my husband almost 3 years ago to cancer and I would absolutely love for someone to tell me something like this. You always want to think your loved ones are ok and are at peace, but you never really know. I would love to know that my husbands love for me had not died simply because he is not here with me physically. She will, most likely, get emotional. I whole-heartedly think you should tell her. This story really makes me happy. It makes me think that maybe my husband still hangs around my son and I. =)

R.:

Yes, I would want someone to tell me about the dreams. Especially if they are from my God daughter.

So tell her what he says in the dream(s).

Go to Philly with bells on!! Be happy!!!

My daughter, my niece and my cousins daughter ALL saw and talked to and fished with and danced with their Great Grandpa when he died in their sleep. They were never scared but it took a couple of years before my daughter came to me and said Grampa talks to me in my sleep. Then I told my cousin...and sure enough...same stories...then to my sister and yep...same thing. I am a FIRM believer in that they do in fact talk to us best when we're sleeping.

When the girls get together, they talk about the dreams...its healing for them. At any rate...tell her. Regardless of time, tell her. Let her know you love her and loved him dearly. It might bring her comfort in knowing he's ok.

I'm sending nothing but good thoughts your way.

I'll be honest - If I was grieving, that sort of thing would make me uncomfortable. I dont' really believe it, and I would feel compelled to be encouraging to you about you feelings, when mine are so strong. I don't take comfort in most of the "nice" sentiments, like "he's in a better place" or "at least his pain is over." If I am sad, I don't really want to hear what makes you feel better. I just want my feelings validated and to talk about happy memories. So for me, generally, no, it would not be what I want to hear. However, you know your aunt very well, and you know where she is in this process of loss. You also are "very close" to her. So sharing your experience of loss is not of a total outsider. So I don't think you should rely too much on others opionions. But I just wanted to represent my own opinion that yes, some people wouldn't take comfort in that revelation.

I would tell her and see her reaction. If she is happy, them continue telling her about the dreams when they occur.
I have a lot of dreams about my dad (it will be 11 years on Saturday). For some reason, my mom gets almost upset when I used to tell her I have dreams about dad. I've since stopped, unless she asks. I enjoy the dreams that I have and if anyone told me they dreamed about my dad, I would be very happy to hear it!

My daughter (who never even had the chance to meet my dad) once told me his picture said something to her - it was a saying he used to repeat quite often. I think he 'visits' her, too :)

It depends on your Aunt, I think. I'm the type of person who personally doesn't believe in this stuff. (No offense intended!! I totally respect you believe in your dreams completely!!!) I would think the person telling me is going a bit wacky, and be upset they are toying with me. If your Aunt tends to feel the same way you do about dreams and similar situations, I don't see why you shouldn't tell her.

I have to say that reading this post gave me incredible goosebumps. I will apologize now if I say the same things as another poster because I did not read any prior to writing this. Definitely tell your aunt about the dreams, all of them, especially the one he insisted. There may be a message that she needs to hear from him that would not mean anything to you " The Messenger". The 12 year anniversary of my mothers passing was just a few days ago, so I can sympathize with your intentions. Shortly after my mother passed a co-worker came to me and gave me a message that she received in her dream. It was a simple one sentence, but I knew the intended message. The sentence meant nothing to her, but she told me because she felt she needed to. I felt closer to her after that and appreciated that she gave me the message. It also helped me to heal a little knowing that only my mom could have sent that message to me. So please tell her, tell her about all of them, it will help her. (My mom passed of Cancer too, not a long time between diagnosis and death,)

The choice is yours, just be prepared for her to be hurt, pissed or a skeptic along with happy or excited. I would see if she is even open to the idea of this to begin with before blurting out your "news" of these dreams.

I would tell her that you dream about him. I would not tell her that he tells you to tell her that you dream about her.

Let her draw her own conclusions as to whether or not he is "coming" to you. It could make her feel bad or guilty if she is not having the same kind of dreams. It could make her wonder what is wrong with her that she isn't being visited like you are.

Let her say what she wants to say, listen, hug her, tell her he was always special to you, and leave it at that. Your job will be done, and you won't hurt her with it.

Dawn

Yes. My lovely mama died suddenly in 02 of a stroke on easter morning. I love to talk about her and I love when family tells me stories or talks about her. I love her so much and miss her and as her death was so quick and unexpected (massive stroke at 50 yrs old) it was shocking and all the dreams I would have of her were awful. Now that its been this long I have better memories but I would love it if you told me. Not everyone feels that way but I do. My mama wore youth dew by estee lauder and I go by the perfume counter sometimes and sniff the mess out of it. !!

O and happy early bday!!!! Mine is Monday :)

My dear Daddy died last year. My mom and I often talk about dreams of him. I love it when I dream of him. My mom loves to dream of her dear departed. We would both love to have a message from him.

I think it would be a lovely gift to her.

I had a hard time after my dad passed away and about 4 or 5 years after his death. He came to me in a dream and told me it was time to say goodbye and to move on. The dream was so vivid and real and it was the first dream of him since his death. When I woke the next morning I had a strange comfort come over me and even though I continue to miss him, I was able to get on with my life and the pain of loosing him was easier to deal with. It was so comforting. If someone had a dream with a message from a loved one that passed, I would want to know.