29 Month Old Won't Let Me Go

Updated on March 17, 2010
E.R. asks from Northridge, CA
4 answers

I have a 29 month old daughter and and currently 5 months pregnant. About a month ago I hired a nanny to take my daughter to her various programs, bring her home, feed her, then put her down for a nap. About a week ago my daughter started crying every time I leave the room. She really likes the nanny, calls her by her name, hugs her when she gets to our house, but the moment I leave the room (even to go to the bathroom) my kid just goes NUTS. I can't let her "cry it out" cuz she gets hysterical and pukes all over the place if I don't calm her down. Once she is at school with the kids she is fine, it is just at home she is like this. The bigger I grow, the less I can do and I am stressing about it. Any advice?

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L.B.

answers from Stationed Overseas on

Have you tried spending some 1 on 1 time with her before passing her on to the nanny? It could be she just wants some attention from you first before food and naps. She probably just misses you and needs that attention.
Good luck!

C.B.

answers from Kansas City on

okay i don't know your situation but unless there is some medical reason, being 5 months pregnant should not stop you from spending time with your daughter. i don't mean to be judgemental but this is a prime age for separation anxiety, she is behaving just as she should, and you're her mother. you will have to spend a little more time loving on her, reassuring her, and being patient with her, and eventually she will grow out of it. right now her sense of security has been butchered because mom suddenly isn't around, spending time with her, doing these things. she is wondering what's wrong with her, did she do something wrong, and where did her comfortable routine go. i guarantee once the baby is here it will get worse, because then, not only have you chosen to spend time apart from her, you'll have replaced her - in her mind. i think it's a perfectly reasonable reaction to the changes she is having to deal with.

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M.B.

answers from Reno on

I am in the same situation like yours with my son. I am 2 weeks away from my birth of my second son and my older one is 3 right now. At the beginning before my belly is showing, he was fine with all the talking and the activities that we are talking and doing to prepare us and him before the baby is coming. But just starting recent months that he starts notice my body is changing and starts to realized that something is up. Then he starts to hanging on to me every chance he got. When he is home and it doesn't matter what I do, he wants to be there too. He is also doing great at school or when his grandparents pick him up after school and feed him for the night or even spending the night over there during the weekends. But the moment he gets home or even when he sees me, he only wants me... So as far as I understand, this is normal for kids to not wanting to let go the full attention of the parents, especially the mother, when there is another baby coming. They feel the anxiety, but don't know why. So just be patient and try to spend more one on one time with your daughter. Doesn't matter what, every little thing you do with her will help and maybe what you can do is, invite her to do something with you, like doing laundry, put away the clean dishes, clean the living room or even taking a walk during the evening to get mail after she gets home from school. What I do is, when I don't have too much energy left when my son gets home, I will try to get everything done early for the day and take a bath with him or just sit down and watch TV with him before he goes down for bed. Hope this will help and good luck! ^_^

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T.L.

answers from San Diego on

oh my, i thought i was the only on who's daughter did that lol. :) but i found the easiest way to breack of that was to just calm her down then let her know where i was going or even take her with me to the bathroom a few times so she knew where i was going, or even put her in her highchair gave her a few snacks then did what i needed to do, she loves dora lol. try new things just get her pre ocupide with something else then run like the dickens to the bathroom lol, just kidding but she will learn that you will come back and she will calm down her ways, it has gotten to the point with us that my daughter would rather play with her friends and her self then with me sometimes lol (she is three). and i am able to do what i need to do in the other rooms with out a fuss, she even lets me clean around the house. she will let me know that she needs a drink in her own way, her show is over, or even when she is hungry or tired. hope this helps

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