3Yr Old Wont Fall into Sleep Until After 10Pm

Hello,
may be time to drop the nap at daycare and put her to bed no later than 7:30 (lights out, story done).

At some point, my 3-year-old started doing that, too. We'd put him to bed by 8pm, but he'd pop out of bed every few minutes asking us irrelevant questions until he'd finally fall asleep at around 10pm. I couldn't understand it because he used to go to bed at 7:30 and wake up 11-12 hours later before he turned 3. At 3 1/2, I took away his nap because I realize he's a heavy sleeper and he could knock out for 3 hours straight and still wake up cranky. I keep him quietly entertained (books, puzzles, etc) while the younger one takes her mid-day nap and he loves the 1:1 time he has with me. He still argues he's not sleepy when we get him ready for bed (why wouldn't he when he knows mom and dad are still going to be up talking and having fun), but he falls asleep between 7:30/8pm within seconds after I leave the room. I miss having some down time during the day, but I find this to be more rewarding since I don't have to tell him to go back to bed over and over again every night. Skipping his nap worked for me because he didn't show signs of crankiness when he skipped his nap and he slept better at night.

Physical activity should tire kids out. Try to keep him going during the day so he doesn't get bored outside of the mid-day down-time. Granted, my son hasn't started preschool yet, but he did attend a few weeks of morning summer camp while continuing his afternoon play dates this summer and I still had the same results - so I didn't think it was because of the lack of activity during his day. Try different things (perhaps even diet, as the previous poster mentioned) and you'll get a better sense of what he needs and adjust accordingly. Good luck!

WHy are you staying with her til she falls asleep? It's a terrible habit, to get a child dependent on your presence to fall asleep. Perhaps she is staying awake in order to spend that time with you. Start a new bedtime routine. Read her a couple of stories, have a cuddle, tuck her in, say goodnight and leave. Also, staying up too late makes them overtired and unable to fall asleep. When my kids were 3, they were in bed by 8:00. Try making bedtime earlier.

I agree with Mindy T. First, I would try an earlier bed time. She might be a bit overtired by 8:40, thus making it difficult for her to fall asleep. It's completely normal for her to want you to stay in the room until she falls asleep, but this is a good time to try to transition our of that. I began by staying for a bit (15 minutes?). Then I'd say, "I'm going to go put clothes in the wash and come right back" or "I need to go to the bathroom, but then I'll come right back." I had lots of excuses. I would leave for a few minutes, but I always came back. Gradually I lengthened the amount of time I was gone, but I would always come back! After a few days when I cam back, he was asleep. It wasn't long before he began asking me to leave so that he could fall asleep.

My now 5 year old goes to bed almost every night without too much trouble. We did this transition shortly before his 3rd birthday (and a month or two after baby brother arrived). By 3 we had a new routine.

Her behavior is normal. But, just like you, I'd want to find a way to help make it easier for you and for her. Good luck!

Put her to bed earlier and don't stay with her! Just kiss her goodnight and let her fall asleep. She has gotten into a bad sleeping pattern and you all need to learn a new routine.

I would suggest:
- Move her whole evening earlier by 15 mintues every couple of days. She's getting her "cues" for bedtime from the household. If the lights are still bright and the t.v. is on, she's not going to think it's time for bed. Eat dinner earlier, bath earlier, stories earlier... all of it until she is getting her bed time cues earlier.
- Establish a new bedtime routine that includes down time and cuddling, but not a parent sitting next to her bed.
- If she doesn't already have one, buy a nightlight for her room
- If she gets upset or tries to leave her room, put her back in bed and give her a kiss and leave again

Kids won't nap if they aren't tired. If she's sleeping at daycare it's because she needs the rest! If she's not getting enough sleep at night, she's going to find that rest time during the day. Going to bed earlier probably won't eliminate the nap, but it may shorten it.

Make sure she is getting enough physical exercise during the day.
Don't feed anything sugary after 3pm.
High carb dinner makes everyone sleep better. Adding some baked potato and eating the skin is a good example.
No liquids if you can help it after 6pm, maybe she's waking up because she gets the urge to go pee?
If you are still up at 10 and she hears the TV and activity going on, she probably wants to be part of that. Definitely cut out any night time distractions.
Your post is hard to understand really... it doesnt make very much sense.

I don't think it's as much overtired as it is she doesn't need as many cumulative hours of sleep as she did even 6 months ago. Maybe she's ready to give up her nap? Maybe have the daycare start limiting her napping to 1 hour or less, then move her bedtime to 9pm and see what happens.

However, my 4.5yo has nights where he lays awake 1+ hours even though I would swear he's tired (yawning, rubbing his eyes, etc). Of course, nights like this, he's awake way earlier than he should be, and is a bear the whole day!

Make sure bath time is calm and quiet.. The longer you rile up a child, double it for the time it will take them to calm down.

Have her in her bed at 7:30. Make sure her room is dark. Make sure outside noises are blocked with soft music or a sound machine.. Do not have sounds of fun going on close to her room.. TV, Cell Phones, loud talking.

Only use a light bright enough for YOU to be able to read. (Like a book light). Sometimes, I would pat our daughter or rub her a little bit..

Have a routine where you read to her while she is in bed.. JUST read the book to her.. Do not make it animated or show her the pictures or ask her questions.. Read fairly slowly. By the end of the book, slow down your reading to a word at a time, not all strung together.

Once you have finished reading, tell her good night sleep tight and leave the room.

If she gets up, do not say a word, just return her to her bed.. And yes, for a few nights, it may take many times.. If she cries, let her cry.

I just wanted to say I'm dealing with the same thing. And boy am I tired!!! It's hard when they are up and active until late. My 3 year old son doesn't fall asleep until 10:00. Most people will gasp and say how their kid goes to bed by 7:00 or whatever it is. I don't get home until 5:30 or 6:30 though. Then, it's play time, tv, water balloons, bath, dinner etc. It's not always a perfect schedule. I do want to see and spend time with my child though! And it's just that by the time I feel I can tear myself away from chores to get him to bed, it's already late.
My MIL keeps him most days during the week and tries to get him to sleep as long as possible. She is caring for him for free, so I try to let this go. Plus, I know she has some health issues and my son can wear her out! If possible, maybe you can ask the day care to shorted your daughter's nap. (??) I wish my son didn't nap so long because I think it's be easier to get him down and then up in the mornings.
As one mom said, it helps to leave the child's room for periods of time. My son will sometimes call for me but it's usually just for his blanket or a drink of water or something small. He doesn't really need me right there by him anymore after a story, which is nice. Best of luck!