Advice for a New Mom of Twins?

K., I completely get your anxiety. My boys are 21 months now and I will say, by month 3, it was already getting better. I did make the decision to pump and do bottles at 3 months (I think this saved my sanity and boobies!). I would just prop them both up and away they would go. It was tricky getting it down, especially burping. I cried ALOT the 1st week of doing it alone, but it was smooth sailing after that. As far as doing all of this with a 3-year old, I am NO expert! My daughter was almost 10 and it was very difficult meeting her demands on me too. I will pray for your patience and strength. It is soooo worth it! Good luck to you, hun. I am a working mom of the 3 kiddos. My sister is my sitter! I am so lucky. Let me know if you want to hear any more about little pointers, would be glad to help out!

can you afford toget any paid help at all?
may be a post partum doula.

Hi - I'm a mom of 2 and half year old B/G twins. First of all let me say congrats to you - and that I understand how stressful and overwhelming the first few months are. I am glad to hear you have had some help, and I know it must feel overwhelming to know that your help is leaving.

I'm not sure what area of DFW you live in, but one thing I would highly recommend if you have not done so already is to get involved with a local "mothers of multiples" group. There are several in DFW. I belong to Lake Cities Mother's of Multiples (www.LCMOM.org) and we meet in Southlake/Keller area. It was a valuable resource for me when I was pregnant, in those first few stressful months, and has continued to be a great resource for me today as questions continue to crop up.

While I don't have any additonal children beyond my twins, I will say that quite a few moms in my group have twins or triplets + other singletons. This coping question with a toddler at home plus twin newborns comes up a lot. I'll pass along what I have heard those mom's pass on as advise:

-With your daughter being 3, highly recommend getting her into a preschool program if you have not already. Provides you a "break" and gives her some time to get out socialize and be stimulated. I know booking something for summer now might be difficult, but for sure look into getting her signed up in the Fall. If you can't get her in a preschool program now, you might look into hiring a mother's helper for your home this summer. With college and highschools out of session for the summer it's the perfect time to hire someone to come help out. They can help you juggle and even get your daughter out for "adventures" like the local area parks etc. My sister has a newborn at home now plus a three year old, and she has made these arrangements for the summer and it is making all the difference for her. My nephew not "bored" so much and so behaving better and not as jealous of the time she is having to spend with my newborn nephew.

-In regards to your managing your multiples...if you aren't on a schedule yet...work to get there. Breastfeed both at same time, make sure they nap at the same time, etc. This will be important to your general sanity. If you need some help or tips for getting there let me know and I can get you connected with some moms that can provide some advise.

-One mom in my group recommended that you use the time when you are breastfeeding your twins to also have "special storytime" with your toddler. She did this with hers and she said it made all the difference in her toddler's attitude about her mommy needing to spend time to feed the twins and that her daughter began to feel more involved in that process and really looked foward to that special time with mom.

-You have to get creative when you are managing two newborns...you will be amazed by what you can accomplish...don't be hard on yourself if you are managing them differently than you did you first born...we do what we need to do and they will be just fine. :-) :-)

Would be happy to talk to you directly if you would like or help you get connected with a mothers of multiples group near you. Feel free to drop me an email. I know being in a new place and trying to juggle it all is difficult. I will tell you it does get easier with passing weeks and months so hang in there!

Hugs and Best Wishes!
G.
____@____.com

My twin boys were born the beginning of June and my mother has been helping out as well. I also have a 6 year old and 3 year old boys. My mother leaves next week and I am terrified (she lives out of state). I have been crying all week with anxiety. My 6 year old will start 1st grade soon and my 3 year old is set up for preschool. I think that will help a little. My husband works out of town most weekdays and I recently quit my job to stay home with the kids. I feel your pain. I also plan to go to the Lake Cities Mothers of Multiples group when they start up again next month. Hope they have some seasoned moms to help me out. If you need someone to go insane with, I'm here.