Am I Just Lazy?

that doesnt sound lazy, it sounds like agorophobia and depression.I would seek a therapist if possible.

I agree with those that say the meds probably need to be changed. I would never call someone with three kids doing the single Mommy thing "lazy". I also agree with the one who said to be careful about the meds.

My take is that this is NOT laziness, but a side effect (apathy & irritation) from your meds. I would personally go visit with my Psychiatrist and find a new med.

I can think of 12 or so that treat anxiety (but there are soooo many more), and they're all vastly different from each other. How meds react with our neruochem varries from individual to individual. ***You know you've found the "right" med, or combo of meds... because you just feel like YOU***. All meds have side effects (in fact, I often think of meds as "picking your side effect" or "finding the flavor you like best")... but those side effects change from person to person, and vary a great deal in application. The side effects *I* get from one med will be different from the side effects *YOU* get. For example: in ADHD meds Adderal causes violent temper tantrums in some kids/adults (adderage), but causes euphoria in others, and for still others evens out their moods. For others there's no mood thing at all, but they get really hungry, or are NEVER hungry, or have diarrhea, or their heart races, or it slows, or they can't sleep, or they can do nothing but sleep. ALL of whom have adhd. But their neurochem reacts differently. If it didn't we'd only have 1 drug per disorder.

Also, don't get hung up on med labels. Literal labels. The way drug companies work is that if they already have a best selling antidepressant, and they develop a new antidepressant... they label it as anything else it's good for (like anxiety, adhd, bipolar, antipsychotic) that they don't already have a bestseller category. Even if their new antipsychotic is actually a mediocre antipsychotic but a reeeeally good antidepressant. Good psychiatrists know all the ins and outs (one reason never to get a neurological scrip from a GP)... and so for anxiety, with those side effects, you may well be recommended to TRY a med that isn't labeled for anxiety, but something totally different. Or you may get another anti-anxiety med. Point being... don't sweat it. But DO look into switching your meds.

The others gave great advice on seeking a med that well help and I totally encourage that too. So I am going to suggest more lifestyle type changes that you can start in the meantime and help you keep up.

You need to reprogram your thinking. On days when I just want to lay on the couch, it's so easy b/c I keep telling myself how exhausted and depressed I am that I am being lazy. Then, one day, I decided I had enough and was going to train myself. As for training yourself, it takes time and motivation... things I lack very often.

I made a little schedule to help, just basic things to do in the mornings, then again in the afternoons, and night. When I start to feel down and tired, I eat a healthy and simple snack and get to work. I out things that sidetrack me easily (like the computer) off and say I can't get on until my thing is done.

I also try and have at least one fun activity or alphabet lesson for my boys a day, and that has helped a lot as well.

As for dinner time, I never ever cooked. So, I got a dry erase board and hung it in my kitchen. It has the days of the week written on it, and I write down each nights dinner, usually leaving a blank between some nights for leftovers. It has helped me out so much. Here are simple weekly meal plans that you can print out even:

http://www.livinglocurto.com/weekly-meal-plans/

It sounds so simple, but it really has helped me tremendously. I have actually started to cook dinners again, to do housework, to play with my kids. Over complicating the list at first may backfire, so start small, and build up to new tasks once you have are getting it down.

Also, doing a little bit of excersize in the mornings, taking a shower and getting dressed first thing will help you get motivated and the excersize will get you moving and feeling better too. Just maybe start off with a few jumping jacks and sit ups or lunges.

As for the yelling at the kids, I have been like that too. I'm hypoglycemic and when I start to get faint and such, I become more easily aggravated, weak, upset, and the yelling starts because I don't have the energy or brain power to think of a better technique or deal with the problem first hand.

But, I got this book, and it teaches lots of great techniques that can help. My boys have improved so much, and a lot of that is because my parenting has improved greatly. I owe it to what I have learned in this book.

The Discipline Book: Everything You Need to Know to Have a Better-Behaved Child : For Birth to Age Ten by Dr. Sears
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0316779040/carroll...

It may not be depression, but a side effect from your anxiety med. Either way, please talk to your doctor. It is no way to live and is sucking the joy out of your life. Do you have a good friend that will help you be accoutable? Have your friend meet you at your house for play dates or going to the park with the kiddos. Many times with depression and anxiety, it is the thought of doing these things that get ya. But once you are doing it, you are ok.
Please talk to your doctor and find yourself a good support netword. Do you have a church family? Or a local MOPS group(mothers of preschoolers)?
God Bless you! And God Bless your brave hubby!
M.

Girl, the first person to call you lazy should immediately hit themselves in the head with a tennis racquet.

Your meds are probably sapping your energy. Ask your doctor what you can do to get some of that energy back.

Hugs, my friend.

If you are not seeing a psychiatrist for your meds, I would suggest one. They are the best at presecribing the kind of medication you are on, it does not sound like it is enough, you have so much on your plate, and you are describing classic depression, a psychiatrist can help you, and you will feel better.

Take care,
M.

Talk to your doctor. This could be a side effect as PP said or a separate issue of depression. Either way your psychiatrist needs to know and should be able to help.

Good luck.

T.

Celexa is a very weak SSRI compared to others. That being said, it's generic (Lexapro is the current branded form that is also weak in my opinion).

Each person will respond differently to each medication, but it takes time to let your body get adjusted to them.

For depression/anxiety, there are 2 main classes of treatments that are most widely used (SSRI - Selective Seratonin Reuptake Inhibitors and SNRI (Seratonin and Norepinephrine Reuptake Inhibitor).
I've been on many. I hated the side effects with some and finally found that fluoxetine (Prozac) worked best for me. But, I stopped it when I had my first child and am choosing not to go back on despite still having minor anxiety issues (mostly OCD).

Really important: there is a difference between branded and generic versions of the same medication. The FDA allows for a variation gap in the active ingredients, so if you like Celexa, see if Tricare will pay for you to try the brand vs. the generic version to see if it affects you differently.

I'd also speak with your doctor about 2 other things:
1. fatigue - could it be related to something other than depression? could you have a hormone imbalance elsewhere? are there other symptoms such as nausea/weight loss that might indicate another medical condition
2. therapy - when I finished chemo almost 18 months ago, I was terrified of living as a cancer survivor. I chose to seek therapy to work through my issues vs. using medication this time around. it really helped me understand myself better and to be a better wife, mother, friend, etc.

Good luck! You have a lot of support and empathy on this site!

Honey,
Sounds like me a few months ago. I was depressed. Please find someone to talk to or work with. I'm sure the military has someone who can help. I'm not thinking medications though. Sounds like a pretty stressful situation (3 kids, stay at home). I started taked 5 HTP (all natural) recommended by some mamas here on mamapedia. I take Calms Forte to sleep at night (another reco by mamas). I still haven't figure out how to get exercise back in my day, but I'm working on it. I'm glad you can see what is going on. Now, you just have to take a little action and you'll feel better.
My prayers are with you,
S.

You have some great responses. No, you are not lazy. Talk to your doctor about getting a 'piggy back' with your Celexa. Sounds like the Celexa did the job with your anxiety but you need something else for depression.

Having three kids with your husband in Iraq is a huge stressor. Don't be too hard on yourself. You have three kids, the house does not have to be perfect. Have the older kids help out...doing chores is a great lesson in pride and responsibility. Daddy is taking care of our country so let's honor him by taking care of our home together. You can talk about Daddy while doing chores as a family.

I hope you find the answer you are looking for.

It sounds like you are still having problems with depression. Celexa can help - and it sounds like it has - tremendously. I am wondering if your doctor needs to add something to it or up your dose a little bit. I know before I was on Celexa - which I do take - I was very prone to yelling and getting upset over little things, no energy, no want to do anything, etc. Celexa has helped me a great deal but I did have to go to a higher dose. I would talk this over with your doctor and see what their take is.

I know alot of people have stated you need more meds or a psychiatrist if you don' have one. All I can say is be careful...so often you end up wrapped up in a world of meds & taking another & and another to counteract side effects of the original one you were on. My first thought is make sure your dose isn't too strong...the second is check out the side effects, even the ones that say rare....third is hormonal changes....right now I could sleep 24/7 & I have NEVER been a sleeper...I can't bring myself to do laundry, dishes, exercise, NOTHING....totally not me. I talked to a friend who is in nursing school & she said it is most likely a hormonal change going on. I forgot to ask her how long it will last. I'm with you..I am disgusted with myself, but after talking to her I'm going to give it a little time and see what happens. Sometimes we have to patience with ourselves.

First of all, don't beat yourself up about it!
It is common for moms, especially with the husband not home to help, to become depressed. Your life revolves around your kids, and you are doing it solo, so it overcomes you.
My best suggestion would be to find someone you trust to watch the kids, and sign your self up for a yoga class. The classes will not only help you to calm down, but will give you some "me" time, and provide you with some exercise. Killing 3 birds with one stone!
Also, do you live on a base? I lived at Ft Campbell KY, and we had a wives club that was very helpful when I needed babysitting, someone to talk to who knew what I was going through, or even just some lady friends to meet at the park with the kids or have some coffee with once in a while.
Resources are available whichever route you choose, just go ahead and choose one, you will feel better the minute you do, and it will progress from there!
Good Luck

Hello, I'm a manic depressive....I took Celexa and loved it. However, it did start to "not work" after about 6 months and I had to switch to something else. I just got off of Effexor (40 pound weight gain) and on to Pristiq.
I was really nervous about changing because the Effexor worked so well! My Dr. said the reason for this is depression is caused by either serotonin or epinephrine (think that's right) shortage. Different meds treat one or the other or both. Once he put me on meds that treated both I felt WWWAAAYYY better!
Most people don't realize when you go through a big stress even "normal people's" bodies will kinda close down. But people who already suffer with depression and then go through a big stress really close down. Talk to your doctor...get him to help you find the right med and dose. You are going to need all the help you can get while your husband is away! Good Luck!

;

Have you talked to your Dr about this? He may want to check your thyroid levels or adjust your medication. You need to talk to the Dr and get help, it could be a number of things.

You may also be depressed, or still recovering from the anxiety/depression. Make sure your meds are at the right dosage just to be safe. Congratulations and good luck!

Hey, my hubby is gone for training right now (military) and I find myself feeling a lot more tired and watching tons of tv.

I don't know if you have depression or just plain it is more emotionally tiring to be alone with your husband gone. It takes more emotional and mental energy. My army wive friends get more emotionally thrashed and have a harder time thinking and doing when their husbands are gone, too, and we are only in the Natl Guard.

I think you would benefit from having a mini-vacation or a day at the spa or something and see if that rejuvenates you before playing around more with your meds. Can you go somewhere with your best girlfriend and hire a babysitter so that you get an emotional break/rejuvenation?

Then if you still feel super tired and lazy then call your psychiatrist and discuss if this is a side effect?

I think it sounds like you are depressed! Maybe they need to add another medication, the Celexa is also an antidepressant as well as anxiety med but obviously you need something more. Don't feel ashamed or mad at yourself for feeling this way, just call you dr and explain how your feeling. I've been taking an antidepressant for about 7mo after I had beed feeling just like you for about 6 months - wanted to sleep all the time, yelled at my kids and my husband, lack of motivation, etc. I feel completely better now and back to myself but I'm still on my medication. Hope this helps :)

It sounds to me like classic depression or side effects.

I think you need your medication tweaked. Probably a different medication would be better for you personally. Are you still seeing a therapist who is following your treatment? You need to be. If you get your medication switched and you don't get scheduled for follow ups, you should schedule them yourself.

Do you see a doctor on base? I never had follow ups scheduled when I was put on medications for depression by military doctors. And it was never a psychiatrist who saw me, only my PCP. Not that all military hospitals are this way, and I'm not talking bad about them, that was just my experience. I was lucky that mine was not as serious as yours, and I did ok without monitoring. But now, if I was put on meds again, I would be sure to see a psychiatrist, especially since I have a kid. With small children that are dependent on you, I wouldn't take the chance of your meds making you a little wacky and no one to be watching out for that. Especially since you are alone without a hubby to stop and say, Hey, something isn't right.

I am so glad for you that your anxiety is better and you are able to have a life again. I can't imagine how crippling that must feel to be stuck at home, and I know how bad anxiety and depression can feel sometimes. Now you just need to get it all adjusted so that you are a hundred percent. Your situation is tough, and you are allowed to be stressed, but I think you will feel much better if you go see your doctor.

Thank you and your husband and family for your sacrifices for our country. Hope you feel better soon!

Great job for seeking help to deal with the anxiety attacks, but you need to speak to your doctor about the side affects you are having. Write down everything on how you are feeling, how many times during the day you fall asleep, your tiredness, what you eat and consume (just in case it is an issue with iron levels or thryoid), and how you feel through out the day. Take it to the doctor to see. Try doing little things each day. When you get up put a load in the washer, at lunch put it in the dryer and before going to bed fold it and put away. Before yelling, I am a yeller too, stop and count to 10, then react. Try to whisper instead of yelling. It gets their attention because it is not your normal behavior. First few times they may look at you like you are crazy but they will have to stop and listen because you are being so quite. Whispering takes less energy than yelling. Get on a set bed time and get up time. Exercise whether you want to or not. When you get up in the morning sitting on the side of the bed do shoulder, ankle, and neck rolls and lots of stretching. During the day, park way out in the parking lot so you have to walk to get to the store. Before bed do some streching. It will make you feel better. My father has a saying (he has COPD) "You have to keep moving no matter how bad you feel or you will die before your time." He has out lived the doctor's predictions by 16 years, so I feel there is truth in that.

Definitely talk to your doc. Maybe this is not the best medicine for you overall. Are there other options you can try?

Others may have said this, but do talk to your doctor. My dad went on the same meds you are on for anxiety and he slept ALL of the time. It may be that they need to decrease your dosage. Don't be too hard on yourself, but do try to make a daily plan of activities and check them off your list. That might help you get motivated to get up and get things done. But, I bet the meds you are on have A LOT to do with how you are feeling! Good luck!

You need to get off the meds. They are causing you to be tired and gain weight. Your kids need a more stable mother. In my opinion, people have panic attacks because they are afraid of the world, and death, specifically. I don't blame you--it's scary, but it is a fact of our existence, and your kids need you to get it together for their sake. Especially since your husband is not around right now. Please, get into counseling and get weaned off of that medication. We have such a limited time on this earth; don't spend it drugged out of your mind.

Speak to your doctor ASAP. Sounds like depression in my opinion as well. You stay at home. You don't have much adult interaction. Your husband is overseas. Plenty of good reasons to be down in the dumps. I think it would definitely be helpful to speak with a therapist. Also, be sure to do things for yourself. Get involved in an activity outside of the home. Good luck! Keep us posted.