Apartment Issues

Who reports? It sounds like you guys report each other so isn't it possible they are reporting you because you are reporting them?

All I can say is that I hate apartment living.
You think YOU have problems?

Oy.

I am the quietest person where I live. There are only 4 apartments and it's very rural. All four tentants are single women. I have one neighbor who works and is very quiet. She has two adult sons who live with her. They should be out on their own, but she never coped well with her husband dying and having her sons with her is a comfort. They are quiet.
My son is 17 and lives with me. He goes to high school and works. I'm on temporary disability and hope to get back to work soon.

The two women who don't work and have nothing to do but fight with each other and complain to the landlords all the time are a serious problem. They fight about EVERYTHING! It gets loud and nasty and they scream words that nobody should have to hear.

My point is that when the landlords have had enough, all of us get letters. We are ALL addressed. Now, the landlords know who is who and what is what and I have had to learn not to take any of it personally. Something may have my name on it but not even be directly related to me. It's kind of a "blast" trying to make rules clear.

Before you flip your lid, and I mean no offense by that, you should have a conversation with your landlord. My landlord has told me that I don't need to worry at all because I don't cause problems. Letters and notifications are sent to everyone and the people who DO cause problems know who they are.

I don't feel "harrassed" when I get a letter after a fight my neighbors had over the laundry room. It had nothing to do with me. I don't get offended by reminders about everyone playing nice and following the rules. I already do.

I would clarify things with your landlord. You could be taking things more personally than you need to. I know I did at first.

I don't sweat the things that don't apply to me anymore.

Best wishes.

M.:

This sounds like drama. Tit-for-Tat. You report. They report. Is it possible that it's "payback"? Yes, it most certainly could be. What do you think will happen if you stop reporting??

I don't know the rental laws in Florida. I would consult an attorney with my rental contract as well as the violation letters. See what they say. If they yes, be prepared to move.

Who is giving you the violation notices? The office or just other neighbors? I mean - did you stop to think that your reporting is harassing them as well? You are complaining about the SAME THING you are doing.

If you can't afford an attorney (most do give consults for free), talk to the management office and see what you can do to remedy/stop this.

Good luck!!

I would want to move if I had to supervise my 7 and 10 year old, but I can't imagine having to supervise a 15 year old!!!

Anyone under 16 has to be supervised? Geez. I'd want to move somewhere else just for that. How dangerous is your playground that they had to make that rule?

ETA: A kid could fall and break his arm with a parent right there. Making a rule that only kids 16 and older can play at the playground unsupervised won't make it any safer. It'll just make it less likely for kids to go out and play.

When you talked to the manager about the notes on your door and why they were there what did they say?

Sounds like they are targeting you because they don't actually know that the kid out there isn't yours.

Talk to the apartment office and tell them that you NEVER send your son out there alone and that you are tired of getting harrassing notes. THEN put a sign on your front door saying "Whoever you saw on the playground unsupervised is NOT my child. Stop leaving me notes!"

Make sure your son never sneaks out to play without you knowing.

Dawn

I, too, suggest that you're taking this too personally. You know you've complied. If the notes are coming from management, go and talk with them so that they know that you're outside with your child. Then just throw the notes away.

I would also stop reporting others. It's really none of your business if others don't obey the rules. You're responsible only for yourself and your child.

I suggest that management isn't enforcing the rule. Why should you expect others to comply? It's not your job to enforce the lease. What they do is their responsibility. What you do is yours. You believe in compliance. Some others don't. You can't change them. You only make yourself miserable.

You are especially honest. You get upset with a notice. That can be seen as being "holier than thou" to those who don't have the same values that you have. So, of course, if one of them saw your son outside by himself even for a brief moment they're apt to be petty and report him because they see you as being petty when you report them.

Whether or not others comply is just not your responsibility. You are only responsible for yourself and whether or not you live up to your values.

Take a picture of your child to the apartment manager. Tell him/her they obviously have your kid mixed up with someone else's!

Yep, sounds like you are getting these notes because you're reporting other people's kids. It may not even be the reported kids' parents doing it -- a teenager with a grudge that you reported his or her family could be doing it.

How does the management react whenever you report an unsupervised kid? I think that's important to know here. If the management is swift to react and says "Thanks, we need to know these things, we'll talk to that family today," they are likelier to work with you, but if the response is usually, "Uh, OK, whatever" and a blank stare -- you are not going to get squat. And...how does anyone know it's YOU reporting unsupervised kids? Is it possible that someone in the management office is telling these families that you were the one who reported them? That would be stupid on the office's part, since if you are harassed or hurt -- the office should be to blame. But it's possible that someone in the management office tells these people you're the one. Honestly, that would worry and frighten me.

I hope you have kept copies of the notes -- every one. I would take them to the apartment management and say that you are being harassed, and it's probably because you have blown the whistle on other people's kids being unsupervised. Tell the management that you don't know who has told these people you are the one reporting them, you can only assume it's the main office itself, and it needs to stop now.

Tell them that you have a right to live in your apartment without being harassed. If they are uncooperative, tell them you will be talking with (fill in the blank here with some local legal organization that represents tenants!). Those kinds of organizations make apartment managers crazy and mentioning them might get you some action --though what it would be, other than the management sending out a notice not to leave notes on doors, I don't know. Maybe that's what to suggest -- a new rule that notes cannot be left on tenants' doors, stuck underneath doors or stuck in the door frames, left on cars, etc. In other words, if you want to communicate, send me a letter, right?

Be aware that going to the management will put you on their radar as a "troublemaker tenant" so....you may have to deal with that. You will not be popular with other tenants if you push for a no-notes-anywhere policy, and it is hard to enforce too. But you do have a right to complain.

Have you talked to the office and told them they you think they have the wrong kid/parent, because you keep getting the notices, despite supervising your child? That seems like the easiest start to getting something done.

Why are you reporting unsupervised kids to the office? Maybe someone's getting sick of getting notices because their 15 year old was unsupervised and they're trying to get back to you. Who knows. Sounds like a lot of unnecessary drama, when all you have to do is communicate with the office about the notes.

16 is a ridiculous minimum. Besides, accidents happen with parents sitting right there, so I'm not sure how this new policy will prevent accidents.

Have you walked over to the management office and spoken to someone? Perhaps the notes are being left on someone else's door and they know you are the one reporting them so they move the note to your door? Who knows, but all it will take is a simple, civil conversation with management to find out what's going on.

Calm down first and then go talk to them.

FYI - to me, 16 is a bit much. If I had to sit outside to watch my 13 or 14 or 15 year old play, I'd move!