I am finally going to ask this... Let me preface by saying my daughter would not have seen this happen anywhere, and there is no way anything bad or wrong happened or was witnessed by her.
My daughter is 2 1/2 and for some reason, several months ago, she discovered something odd that seems to soothe her. She does this while she is resting and while she is falling asleep at night. What does she do? She lies on a stuffed animal and rubs her privates on it! <sigh> Is this normal? Do other toddler girls do this? Do I just ignore it? I nicely ask her to stop, I take away the stuffed animal, I tell her it's not nice, it's dirty, it can give her a boo-boo. I'm afraid it will continue. How should I handle this?
Thanks!
Wow, thank you for all the responses. I guess I wasn't thinking too far into the future and setting the stage wrong by using poor terminology. Thank you SO much! I won't tell her it's bad or dirty anymore, perhaps I will tell her to do it in her room because it's private. Thank you all so much!
So so normal....please PLEASE don't tell her it is "dirty" or tell her to stop...you will be making a HUGE mountain of a teeny tiny little mole hill...don't make her feel "dirty" ....
Please, please, please do not tell her it's dirty, not nice or will give her a boo-boo. You set the stage as the parent for your daughter's views on sex and her sexuality later on. Do you really want her to think something that is perfectly normal (masturbation) is bad or dirty? Do you want her to think that she, as a sexual being, is dirty or bad. Sure that is a long way off but it's something we as parents need to think about (even if it makes some of us uncomfortable). You also want your daughter to feel good about her body. That is empowering and will make her strong enough to be protective of her body and not just give herself away freely in the future.
All that being said, she is very young and all she knows is that it is something that feels good and is soothing. She doesn't know anything else or any different. As long as she understands that this is something private and only for her room then I would leave her alone and she will probably stop in her own time.
My daughter will sometimes do this while we are in the car and she is strapped in her seat (she started this around the same age as your daughter). I gently explain to her that that's not for the car and is private.
It is normal – lots of little girls and boys adopt similar behaviors when stressed or relaxing into sleep. Please don't tell her it's dirty, or she could develop shame issues about her body and sex. That can create serious problems in adult relationships.
She's not being sexual, she's just doing something that feels good and relaxing. And she's in the privacy of her own room, the ideal place to send her if she ever does that in public. But it's not shameful, it's just private.
It's perfectly normal for children to masturbate.
This actually pretty normal behavior. Some girls do it, some don't. I had one daughter who did it, and two who didn't. The one that did stopped at some point. The only thing I told her. If she wants to do that, then she needs to go to her room and do it. (She didn't use a stuffed animal.)
From personal experience, it stops. At this point, she found something that makes her happy and relaxes her.
Whatever you do, don't tell her that what she's doing is dirty or not nice. She could have issues when she grows up. My mother told me sex and masturbation was wrong, dirty and a sin. (Well, sex wasn't a sin or dirty, but only under certain circumstances.) I've since realized that...well, really? Come on Mom. (That was to my mom, not you, lol)
Totally normal, not DIRTY. Telling her dirty will set the stage for her relating to sex as dirty and be sexually dysfunctional as she grows up. Keep your lines of communication wide open, just tell her that is private for her room, etc.
You got good advice just don't label normal functions as dirty in her head.
yes it's totally normal. I think if not all kids, then most kids do this at some time. My daughter did it when she was younger. She is 6 now, and I haven't seen her do anything like it in years now. The only thing is that I wouldn't tell her something that feels good to her is "dirty", but just tell her to do it when she is alone in her room for privacy. Just keep her underwear or diaper on (which ever she wears)
My little sister did this also...my mom just told her to do it in her room...
i know you already got your answers & i'm glad you feel better. i was tripping when my daycare lady told me my son was doing that. i was thinking - "well he's getting it more than me b/c he's definitely not seeing this celibate mama doing ANY humping!" lol
anyway, my other gf told me her little girl (bout 3 yo) does the SAME thing. i was feeling SO weird until she told me that...then felt MUCH better. i'm glad you do too. apparently it's very normal, just not something i read in any of my parenting books, lol. :)
Completely normal. My daughter is almost 6 and will tell me at times she has "tickled her bottom" as she calls it before she goes to sleep at night. Not really a big deal.
Very normal, just make sure she knows this is something she only does in private. Ignore it as long as she does it in her room or bathroom... without people around to watch her.
When she actually starts exploring with her hands and fingers, just add to the mix that she must do that with clean hands and to clean her hands AFTERWARDS as well.
Hi T.,
My daughter is 4 and she does it too. At first it grossed me out and I told her it was bad and not to do it. At that age its not a sexual thing. It just feels good and like you said its soothing. I've told my daughter if she does it it needs to be in private and not all the time. I've realized the more I push or say something, the more she will do it.! Your not alone, I've dealt with it too.
Normal, just let her know she should do it in private.
Yep, totally normal! My daughter is almost 10 and she started doing this in front of the television when she was little. I simply told her it was something she could only do in private, in her bedroom. I have walked into her room relatively recently and "caught" her doing this. Now I knock, every time :)
