Excuse the Interruption

This is a very annoying and very common problem. I always joke that if I want my kids to talk to me all I have to do is pick up the phone. : )

My kids are now 5.5 and 8.5. When they need to talk with me and I'm in the middle of a conversation they are required to put their hand on my hip. That's a non-verbal cue to me that they need to talk with me. I usually put my hand over theirs to acknowledge their respectful request. Then, when there is an opportunity to break my conversation I praise them and allow them to talk.

This is not perfect because it doesn't address when they are just so excited or anxious that they blurt things out. But, for the most part, it works like a gem and interruptions are much more pleasant and respectful.

Good luck!

Kudos for the "excuse me". But yeah, that can get annoying too. Saying it isn't a license to interrupt, but kids sure do think it is.

My son isn't this old yet, so I am not really experienced in this, but I have a sister who is quite a bit younger and I remember what my mom did with her. She was a huge talker and interrupter. My mom made her start raising her hand. She couldn't say a word out loud until she was "called on" just like at school. So sort of like Kimmie's answer below, but I think I like Kimmie's better. My sister would sometimes get so impatient that she would start waving her hand in the air, which is also annoying. But the key was the non-verbal "excuse me". It worked pretty well with her, and I swear she still does it sometimes as an adult out of habit. :)

Great question! 1st time I've seen that asked here.

Lecturing won't help...as you have seen.
Try this technique from school. Find a talk stick, or toy, or stuffed animal....
In college dorm meetings, we used a pink stuffed teddy bear.
Whoever is holding the "talk object" has the floor. When someone else wants to speak, they raise their hand and when the speaker is finished, they hand the item to the next person.
It really works!

And he's 5, so it'll be a game that teaches listening and patience. Set just a couple other rules.....like when your hand is up, mouth is closed and you listen....you can't be raising your hand the whole time or immediately after I start talking.....

You won't have to do this forever....but it really worked in college in an all girls dorm with 80 girls, 3 RA's and the dorm director. The director would start each meeting, holding the bear, would pass bear to the RA's who had a chance to speak, then when the floor opened up to others, the bear traveled, too.

Thank you for addressing this! As a summer coach for dozens of kids, I thank you for wanting to have a well mannered son!!!!

My answer is i have a 6 year old little boy and let me tell you he act the same way and you are right it done get on your last nerve and it is annoying at the same time and i believe that he just want attention from you noi matter what you do.

We are in the same stage as you, except I have my 5 yo son and my almost 3 yo daughter doing the same thing...usually at the exact same time. We tell them to say "Excuse me" and make them wait until the adult conversation is over. But it does get annoying. I like the raise your hand until I call on you idea. I am going to try that with my kids.

The worst is when we are in the car and they start screaming over each other to get my attention. :(. Hubby will roll down their windows a little bit and create that helicopter noise in our car or turns up the volume of the radio really loud for a few minutes. That usually gets them to quiet down since it starts to hurt their ears. Before that we would all be yelling in the car and no one was being heard.

We first had our children say "excuse me" which soon became annoying becuase they would say it over and over and louder and louder.

We just started a new thing, which seems to be working so far. It is mostly our 4 year olds who interrupt. Now they are supposed to walk up quietly, and if we're talking they have to grab or hold my hand and squeeze it once. This usually will get my attention. I told them I will squeeze back to let them know I felt it. They have to wait quietly while I finish my sentence. I will then tell whomever I'm talking to, to please excuse me. I thank my child for quietly sqeezing my hand and then ask what they need. If I squeeze them back 3 times that means that they will need to wait a while for an answer and they may just want to try again later. If they squeeze my hand twice that means it's an emergency. They only are allowed to squeeze twice if someone is really hurt or going to get hurt. I actually do not allow them to interrupt while I'm speaking with someone at a store. Of course if it's two squeeze worthy they can.

We are still perfecting it but so far it's working great.

Hi L. - yes, I totally understand your problem. I would be on the phone and my son would come up to me and say "excuse me". If I couldnt stop my conversation, he would say it over and over and louder and louder.

They do outgrow it so that is the good news - being in a classroom environment helps alot. The thing that helped alot to explain to my son that saying "excuse me" is the first step in being polite but that the second step is to be willing to be patient if I couldnt take their question just then.

When we are on playdates/mommydates and they are constantly interrupting for no good reason, I had to realize it was just part of their play. I had good luck with telling them that they needed to play on thier own for the next ____ minutes or when the clock says _____.

I hope that helps you!

This is pretty normal behavior and he is saying exuse me and that is a GREAT start! It is for attention. I am a SAHM too and the 5 min I am on the phone or talking with an adult I bump into it is the same here. I think it is just natural for them to show off for our attention even though they get plenty. Sometimes I think my daughter is looking for some attention from the other person too? She is only 3 1/2 so I still have to remind her every time to say "excuse me" and then I usually try to involve her in the conversation somehow or introduce her if she doesn't know the person. I will say something simple like "Can you tell Mrs Jones how fun the park was this morning?" She usually decides that our conversation is much too boring for her at that point. If I am about to make a call I try to explain to her before I get on the phone that Mommy is calling the doctor to make an appointment or calling grandma to ask her for a recipe or whatever. When I am talking to Hubby and she starts the insistent interruption we stop for a minute and (after she says excuse me) we involve her in the conversation for a bit. There could be a secondary motivation if your son is perceptive enough to pick up that it gets on your nerves then it is something he KNOWS will get your attention because it annoys you. Sometimes ignoring bad behavior and remaining calm and unnerved will work on kids. For mine I find they are resistant to this tactic because they are very persistent little people. I simply turn things to positive and try to show them a better way to get Mommy's attention. Patience is something I struggle for all the time (and we all do I think). I just try to remember that they are not little robots to be programmed. They are people with annoying habits and faults like the rest of us. But they make up for it in love.

Sounds like you can help your son by giving him clear instruction before your conversation for example," son I am speaking to the neighbor right now, please read, color, or play with your favorite toy till I am finish, when I am done you can read your story with me, or show me your pictures, or you can tell me about your toy that you played with. If child interruptes, remind him that it is rude and it's not his time. Give a consequence, if he does it again say, because you interrupted now you can not share your book with me and you will have to read alone. It's your time he wants and does not want to share that with anyone. I am a sahm mom of three and consistancy and following through with consequences or rewards is key. Don't give up mom. You are not alone and it will soon pass. Thank God that your child loves you and still needs you. The days will pass so fast and crazy to be said, but you might one day miss the interruptions:) and be fair and resonable, if you spend the whole day conversing with your child he might not except a lengthy conversation that would last for 2hrs. so if you know that you will be talking for a long time, then tell your son, Mommy is going to talk for a while when I am through I will call you and it will be our time to...(make it a special surprise reward! He will want to wait for the surprise:) rewards can be mommy and me time, computer time, movie time, special treat, play a game together, nothing over the top unless you want but always praise them for the little efforts they make. If they get restless during along converstation, tell them thank you for waiting on mommy I am so proud of you for being so respectful. I can't wait to give you your surprise I will just take 5 more minutes. The grown up friend sees and hears your dilema and should be sympathetic, if not tell that person, I only have this amount of time to talk or make a play date and let the kids play while you talk, have a mommy date away from your child if you can, He just wants to know that he is still your #1. Remember that you treat him so all day. and your should he is your child:)

Very normal, but so irritating.. At the age of 5 he should have minutes of patience.
When he says excuse me, tell him, "I need to finish my phone call in 5 minutes.Thank you for not interrupting me"

I have a friend that would ask her kids, "is someone bleeding"? If the answer was no, she would tell them, "I am already having a conversation, I will come and speak with you the minute I am finished, thank you for your patience."

It will just take practice.