Hello Ladies,
I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years now, and he's great! We have known eachother for 5 years (we met at work when I came back from maternity leave- I was a single mom at that point- another story all together lol) but we were work friends, then a group of us started hanging out outside of work and now we've been together for almost 2 years (valentines day will be 2 years). I thought we knew eachother pretty well, we are looking at buying a house early next year, he's great with my son and my family loves him. The other day we were teasing eachother, which is quite funny, we skipped that "honeymoon" phase of our relationship and went straight to acting like an old married couple =) our friends always laugh and say we are super cute lol... anyways, so the other day we are teasing eachother and it's funny, and then I'm talking to a good mutual friend of ours and she was saying how her boyfriend surprised her with tickets to a play for the previous night (just showed up dressed up and said lets go) and I was like oh that's so sweet you get tickets to a play and I get made fun of =) it was very funny. So I tell my boyfriend that so-n-so's boyfriend did this and I get made fun of and we both laugh and he makes a comment about the other boyfriend making men look bad lol. Then he said well I thought you didn't like musical and plays you never seem that excited about them and I jokingly said do you not know me at all, I love musicals and plays, we've never really discussed going to one though so it never came up (he took me to the Cirque de sole Elvis show for Valentines day last year, but he thought I only wanted to go cause I'm a die hard Elvis fan). So he said I always thought you just didn't like them. We should talk more, so that we know these things. and I thought well how cute is that, when do you normally hear a guy saying we need to talk more =) So we have since bought some books for fun like 1001 questions every women should ask a man and the book about us, and other question books just to have something to start with and it's been a lot of fun asking questions at dinner and long car rides and such but I was just wondering what you ladies have done to learn those little things about your spouse that seem trivial at the time, but make it so you know all the ins and outs of your partner? I know a lot of stuff comes with time, which is why I know his shampoo schedule (he uses two but has certains day of the week for each one lol) and his favorite christmas song and how he likes his coffee in the morning and night, and things like that- but did you ever play 20 questions with your spouse? I love that he is the one to make the suggestion and we are having a lot of fun with the books, especially the all about us book but just wondering what others have done =)
Thanks for your ideas! Have a happy and safe holiday!
H.
For the ladies who asked the books we have used so far are: All About Us by Philipp Keel (it's a fill in the blank book for couples the cover is all red, I got it at Borders for 12.99); 237 Intimate Questions Every Women Should Ask a Man by Laura Corn (we reverse the questions too so that I have to answer them as well, I got it at Borders for 19.95). The books we have orderd that have not come yet are: 365 Questions for Couples by Michael J. Beck, orderd on Amazon, and The Hard Questions by Susan Piver, also orderd on Amazon. I also have a few other books similar to the would you rather books that are fun and I just had those for when we sit at the bar on Friday nights with our friends, it's fun to ask those types of questions.
The best advice that I can give you is keep on doing what you are doing!! Sounds like you guys have a great relationship ~ Bravo!!
I'm excited for you guys, so many people date for years and have no clue about each other at all outside of the bedroom or day to day chores.
My husband and I talk, and I think know pretty much everything about each other. and have since the very beginning. We got married only 10 months after we met. On our first date, we laid out our 5 year plans, talked about our goals, how we valued things like finances, family, children, work ethics, education, religion, told our family history, likes and dislikes... we really just bore it all since day one... things that many people don't do until years later, but it was so nice and refreshing..
Couples grow and discover new things about each other over the years, and you find things out like that through trying new things. Like would he ever go bungee jumping with you, you never know until you talk about it or make a plan for a vacation... It's fun when you discover things you have in common, and interesting when there are things where you are polar opposites.. just as long as you can respect each other's differences and compromise.
For instance, we both like action movies, documentaries, war movies, comedies, but every now and then I want to watch a Jane Austen film or something... and he will watch it with me b/c I watch hi, play video games... Anyways, it's all about compromise and discovery.
The little things, like my husband knows I'm feeling sick when he holds my hand, he can just feel it, and I can tell he's zoning out when he does this weird thing with his lips, or differing opinions on things that never really come up... things like that happen over time.
What an awesome idea!
Often I think people make more of an effort to get to know strangers better than they do a spouse. Excellent point!
Gotta go make a list of questions for hubs.....
How sweet. I can see you are gushing for him in your post! Congrats on your love! :)
My husband and I (when he was my BF) played a Newlywed game with some friends. It was a lot of fun to do and helped me learn some things. I would actually like to pick up a book like that to see how we do. I think it really does come with time that you get to learn all of those things. Sometimes he teaches me things about myself I never ever realized, like when I'm thinking about something I bite my lip. I didn't realize it until a couple years ago he said, what are you thinking about? I said, what do you mean? How do you know I'm thinking about something? He said, you bite your lip when you're thinking about something or when you're nervous. Really? You're right! I do! LOL
Congrats again!
Oh, I wanted to add, My husband and I also met at work! :)
you guys do sound like a pretty wonderful couple.
i don't think one needs to know everything about one's partner right off the bat. every now and then the ol' man'll throw me a curve, lo these 28 years down the road. i love that!
:) khairete
S.
I want those books! Can you post the titles and authors? and yes, I think it does come with time. How boring would the rest of our lives be together if we knew EVERYTHING there is to know about someone in the first 5 minutes????
We play that all the time! We have been married for 8 years and are STILL finding out new things about each other. The best thing about marriage is that both spouses grow and change and mature and there will always be more to learn.
We also play a game called "5 things I like about you", where we each say 5 things we like (or love) about the other person. No negativity allowed and we can only copy each other once. :)
It's a great way to gain perspective and see what really matters.
Great post!
Everyone should do what you guys are doing.
You learn something new about each other just about everyday.
We all change too, so what you thought you knew once isnt always the case.
You guys sound like my brother and his new wife, lol. They are both kooks. My husband is just now growing up and not acting like a teenager, its like im falling in love with a new man, only its the same one. Everyday i learn a new thing about him, through his maturity.
That is SO unbelievably Cute! Thank you so much for posting this today. I'm in a relatively similar boat with my boyfriend in that we also met at work, have been dating for about 2 years and in the nxt couple of years plan to move in together.
I play a creative questions game in the car with my kiddos on road trips that my bf thought was pretty cute. I'll start by asking one kiddo "If I gave you a robot "insert animal name here" what color would it be? Big or small? Does it do tricks? Does it were clothing? What would you name it? Etc, etc.... And I basically verbally walk each child through "building" their own robot to their zany specifications while the other children in the car laugh hysterically and wait for their turn to answer robot questions.
So we'll end up with microscopic, motorcycle riding robot chickens with black feathers, laser beam eyes that clean rooms, eat vegetables when no one is looking and can do the macarena and play back weird al you tube videos on voice command... lol
So the kiddos and I let him build a robot on a car trip to the natural history and science museum and I was uber impressed with his creativity and improv skills - I also learned a few things about his personality I hadn't known before. It was also a great bonding experience for the kiddos and him, his answers were progressively motivated by getting the maximum amount of giggles from the backseat rather than paying attention to form or function.... (and he's the analytical type who is usually ONLY focused on form and function)
I'll have to check out those books you mentioned. They sound like lots of fun.
I'll have to chec
aw you guys sound really cute :) it sounds like you're already doing great stuff together. i'm gonna go look up that book you mentioned :)
