My 19 year old daughter is married and lives close to Fairbanks, Alaska. Her husband is in the Air Force. The baby is due on January 15, 2009. I would like to go to Fairbanks and be there for the birth of my first Grandbaby. I am concerned about the weather being 10 - 20 - or 30 below zero temperatures. I don't know how to drive in the ice, snow and bad weather being from Texas. She and her husband live in a very small apartment with one bedroom and one bathroom. I want to be there for my daughter but not sure about the bad weather conditions, etc. Do you have any advice?
If they want help, go! Just don't drive around. Oh, and offer to take the night shifts after feedings if baby is still fussy so mom can feed and get back to sleep.
Congrats!
fly to fairbanks. hire a taxi or an experienced driver. get a bed/breakfast nearby... and explain the situation maybe you can get a discount. good luck.
I'm also from a cold state. If you do drive, the key is that you can't just stop like you do here. Even if it seems like you are driving fine. Always, always use twice the distance you normally would, and pump your brakes to gradually come to a stop. Sort of coast to a stop.
A hint about being in the cold weather. The biggest one - LAYERS. A sweater is great, but you need a turtleneck under it, and you need a thermal shirt under that. Thermal underwear under your jeans, and two pair of socks with boots, not tennis shoes. I'm so not kidding. Wear your knit gloves with big gloves over them, or big thick mittens over those. A scarf and hat are a must (forget a hair do - hope you don't have big Texas hair!).
Last - congrats on the baby! My first Grandson will be here shortly after yours and I'm so excited (but I don't have to go to Alaska to see him!)
Congratulations! First, I would make sure that your daughter wants someone to come stay to help. Be very open and honest with her and tell you you'd love to come, you know she'll need help, but you don't want to step on her toes. Maybe she would prefer you stay in a hotel nearby instead of in the house. Personally, my mom stayed with me for 2-3 weeks after each of my kids was born and I would have let her move in permanatly if she would have!! Ok, after you know if you should stay in the apartment or in the hotel, tell her your fears about driving. She probably won't even think about that because she'll be so used to it. If you stay with them in the apartment, you probably won't have to drive much. But, maybe your son in law could give you a quick driving lesson for driving in the snow. If she has a vaginal delivery, she'll probably be able to drive, but if she has a c-section, she'll need someone to drive for 2 weeks. Next, once you are there, remember you are the guest and just try to be helpful. Being helpful after a new baby isn't always about taking care of the baby, it's about doing laundry, making meals, and keeping things tidy. You might start collecting some freezer meals that you can make while you are there and freeze for her to take out after you've left to make meals easier.
Good luck! Driving in the snow would scare me too!
R.,
Congratulations on the birth of your first grandbaby! I'm thrilled for you. I cannot attest to being in Alaska in the dead of winter, however, I can tell you that there are several very nice lodges that are owned by various cruise companies (I used to work for Princess Cruises, and have stayed at the lodge in Fairbanks). You might want to call and look in to staying at one of those. I don't think they're terribly pricey, but will certainly be comfortable and probably not too far from your daughter, since Fairbanks isn't TOO big. It will at least take care of the trouble with accommodations in her small apartment.
Congratulations and best of luck with your trip to Alaska. It's simply gorgeous there!
My question is... have they asked you to come help? Do they have another support system they can lean on if you don't go? I firmly believe that you shouldn't go "help out" unless they have asked you because you might be less helpful to them because they'll feel guilty that you've traveled all that way and they are too busy with the new baby to give you the full attention they want to give you. If they don't need your help, I'd wait until warmer weather. By then, the baby will be a bit older, not sleeping as much as a newborn, and they'll definitely need extra help.
Try to avoid driving!
Congrats on the new grandbaby.
My TX mother-in-law came to Minnesota to help when I had my first baby. One bedroom apartment. We picked her up at the hospital and she didn't ever have any need to do any driving. My husband took care of the shopping, my MIL did the cooking and cleaning and I did the going to the hospital and whining. It all worked out fine.
When I got back from the hospital I felt like I had been run over by a large truck and it was wonderful to have her there. I'm so glad that you can be there for them.
She didn't really need to do any driving.
If you do need to drive, follow the other poster's advice and/or look it up online.
Have fun!
A.
My husband and I just moved here from Fairbanks. It sounds like your daughter is at Eielson. It is about 45 minutes from Fairbanks and in the middle of nowhere. The road in from Fairbanks is flat and straight, but I would not recommed driving it every day to get to a hotel. Only go if your daughter really wants you there. Maybe a good alternative would be to get two hotl rooms in Fairbanks and have her stay in town while you are there. Prices are good in the winter. Sophies has a kitchen in each room. Wedgewood may also have some two bedroom apartment style hotels that are very affordable. It's beautiful and a great place to visit, but a new mom needs space, especially when it is cold and dark outside.
I agree with the others. Ask your daughter if she wants you if yes, then go and make the most of it. Ask them where to stay, take lots of layers of clothing, don't even try to drive, an accident or stranded mom is not any help. Cook and clean and be grateful if you get to hold the baby even once. I think its very exciting, Congratulations!
Congratulations on the birth of your first grandchild! Before you leave for Alaska, be sure and check the extended weather forcast for that area. I'm originally from Ohio, where there is at least 4-5 months of icy, snowy and cold weather, so I can certainly understand your apprehension about driving in winter conditions. The best advice I can give you on that is to pay attention to the local news and radio for frequent updates and if the local authorities say to stay off of the roads, then do not drive on them until they are deemed driveable. If there are no warnings or road closures, and the weather is still bad, just take your time, go slow & leave PLENTY of space between you and the car in front of you. If you hit a patch of ice, DON'T slam on the brakes as this may cause you to lose control of your car. Is your daughter's husband originally from Alaska or some other cold state? If so, maybe he can drive you around while you're there. Make sure that any car you are driving or riding in has supplies just in case the car breaks down on you, which tends to happen alot in frigid weather. I can't think of a complete list, but I know you can get one from Triple A or some other website that deals with safe driving. I would definitely keep a couple of thick blankets, extxra coats, socks, shoes/boots, gloves ect. Also, keep your cell phone with you and a car charger if you have one. Your car doesn't have to be on for a car charger to work. Also, check the local website for Fairbanks to see if they offer any safe driving tips for winter weather. Good luck on your trip and be safe!
