Help, Once a Good Sleeper, Not Anymore

Updated on September 30, 2006
A.B. asks from Maricopa, AZ
7 answers

My 13 month old has always slept great. At one month she was sleeping in her own crib/room and at 6weeks she was sleeping through the night. She has been bottle fed since one month. To get her to sleep we always gave her a bottle and rocked her to sleep (I know, I know..not good). And occasionally she would wake in the middle of the night crying and all I would need to do is give her pacifier and back to sleep she would go. She is also a light sleeper, any loud noise will wake her up. At one year she switched to whole milk and sippy cups only. She hasn't shown a want for her bottles at all. A week ago she started waking in the middle of the night crying but not wanting to go back to sleep unless we rock her. Then once she fell back to sleep I attempt to put her back in her crib and she wakes again, in fear I will leave her. So the cycle goes on. So now I have tried to give her her milk out in the living room then while she is still awake put her in her crib. For a few nights we let her cry herself to sleep (heartbreaking). And we find that if we put her in her crib awake and rub her back for 5 minutes she goes to sleep. But she is still waking in the middle of the night, I don't rock her, but I give her pacifier and rub her back for a minute and she's sleeping.
I don't see a difference between rocking and rubbing her back. I am confused please help!

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So What Happened?

Turns out Patti was right! My daughter is fighting a cold and since her cold has peaked she started sleeping through the night again!
Thank you everyone for your suggestions!

More Answers

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K.W.

answers from Phoenix on

If the back rubbing is working I would keep it up, I am sure you would rather sleep through the night but somthing has her changing, My son is 3 and I would say about half the time I still have to get up with him just to say "its ok" sometimes. Some nights he will wake up 6 or 7 times those ones wear me out. In the middle of the night I would say if you give her anything to drink do water, we did milk and it is a very, very VERY hard thing to break at least for us it was. Now i put him to bed with a sippy cup of water make sure I show him and say heres your water. Good luck

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D.

answers from Albuquerque on

If you get any good ideas, please let me know. I'm having the same problem with my 13 month old and she too was a very good sleeper at an early age. Now she doesn't want to sleep unless she's in our bed. I'm thinking about getting rid of the crib and buying a toddler bed with side rails. Maybe that will help. I don't know.

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P.M.

answers from Boston on

Is there any possibility that you're fighting against an illness? I ask this because my 15 mo. daughter did a very similar thing. She's a great sleeper and always has been. Recently she started waking in the middle of the night. We would give her her pacifier, sippy cup (didn't matter if anything was in it), rock her, or just cuddle to help her get back to sleep. She usually wasn't awake for very long. No fever. No fussiness (other than being overtired... or so I thought). No "symptoms" of anything. About 2 weeks after this all started, I took her in to the doctor b/c she started to put her finger into her ear (so subtle). Still no fever. Still no noticeable fussiness. Her appetite had decreased ever so slightly. Come to find out she had a double ear infection & a sinus infection. Got her started on anti-biotics right away and within 3 days she was sleeping soundly again.

I'm not suggesting that your daughter is ill, but there may be something else going on. If she starts to give you any signs (subtle or otherwise), you may want to check on them quickly.

Good Luck!
P.

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C.R.

answers from Raleigh on

My advice would be to put her to bed while she is awake, but after a routine to help her relax, like a bath then a quite story. Give her a kiss and hug good night and put her to bed tell her goodnight and leave the room. If she starts to cry then let her for 5 mins, then you can walk in and let her know everything is ok and that it's time to go to sleep then leave the room again. Repeat this while increasing the time you're out of the room, ie: 5 mins, 10 mins, 15 mins, until she finally goes to sleep. It will be heartbreaking to do but after a few nights of this she will learn that she needs to put herself to sleep and once she gets it down then she should put herself back to sleep in the middle of the night. I did this with my son when he was still an infant, putting him to bed while he was still awake and he slept through the night just fine and has always put himself to sleep.

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M.K.

answers from Colorado Springs on

Is it possible that it is the milk? It seems like it kind of happened at the same time. Or could it be some other factor that started at the same time. I put my daughter on rice milk.

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L.K.

answers from Phoenix on

A.,

If she is waking up and wanting "Mommy" - I would hold her and rock her to sleep. You are her security and to ensure she feels secure, do what is in your heart. Believe me, she will not be sleeping with you as a teenager. The early years are so important to establish trust and build independence gradually. At 13 months, she is still TOTALLY dependent on you. If she is going through a "phase" - it will not last that long. Trust your instincts - it will be best for both of you.

L.

L. Kandell, MS, RD, IBCLC
Registered Dietitian/Pediatric Specialist
International Board Certified Lactation Consultant
AFFILIATED NUTRITION CONSULTANTS, LLC
Scottsdale, AZ 85258
###-###-####

I am a firm believer in attachment parenting. I have two children, 8 yr old daughter, 5 1/2 yr old son. Both are confident and have no separation anxiety at all. Very secure and happy children - I attribute this to being there socially, emotionally and physically whenever they need it.

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P.S.

answers from Phoenix on

It's all about habits and routines. Like anyone, children will resist a new routine. It generally takes about a week to settle them into it. I remember seeing the chapters in my baby book for "Waking at 12, 24, 36 months" and thinking 'why would they wake up after being in a routine'? They both did. Whether it was from teething or who knows what, I would just comfort them and put them back to sleep. Admittedly, with my first I did a lot more holding and rocking, but with my second I learned to not pick her up every time she woke up at night. And generally it took 5 -7 nights to get into or return to a routine. I think you are better off just patting her back and letting her fall (back) asleep on her own, then to pick her up. In the long run you will both be better rested. I still snuggle with my girls (8&4) at bedtime, I dreed the day when they don't want to 'nuggle' with mom anymore.
Good luck.

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