How Do I Stop the Screaming?!?!

Updated on May 16, 2007
C.P. asks from Littleton, CO
9 answers

My precious little 15 mo old boy is a screamer! If he wants something, he screams for it. It drives me NUTS! He doesn't talk now, and I know he gets frustrated because he can't communicate with me, so he screams! Does anyone have suggestions on how I handle it? Other than telling him "no", I don't know how else to get him to stop...that doesn't work!

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T.H.

answers from Denver on

Hi C.,
Sounds like you have had some great advice! My son screamed twice, the first time I put him in his room and told him if he wanted to scream he would have to do it in his room, I walked out and closed the door. The second time I picked him (no words) and put him in his room and closed the door. He has never screamed again. I did teach him sign language at an early age and he is a great communicater- I just don't do screaming and he learned very quickly I wasn't messing around.
Hope this helps,
Peace, T.

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J.A.

answers from Colorado Springs on

Hi C.-

You have gotten some solid advice. At 18 months, he should use anywhere from 5-20 words. If he's not, the screaming could be the only way he knows to communicate with you. That being said, I don't think ignoring it or punishing him (ie putting him in his room) will help. He is old enough to use a few basic signs. I am an early intervention speech therapist and we typically start with "please", "thank you", "more", "yes", etc. Kristen's advice regarding choices was right on. In early intervention, we encourage parents to offer their children a choice between 2 objects. That way they can point to what they want. You can also take his hand and ask him to show you what he wants. When he does, you can say something like "Oh, you want milk." He will learn that this will get his needs met, and the screaming will probably decrease. Once he does start using signs, pointing, etc. THEN you can start taking a stand against the screaming. Until then, assume this is his only means of communication. What you don't want is for the behavior to get worse.

As for Childfind...If you are interested in having him evaluated for early intervention, you need to contact your local school district. They will give you the number for Childfind. Childfind does the evaluation. If he qualifies and you are interested in services, they are provided at no cost to you. If you have any questions, please don't hesitate to ask.

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J.L.

answers from Denver on

How about responding with whispers. He has to stop screaming to hear what you are saying.....

E.B.

answers from Fort Collins on

My 18 month son has the same problem. I started teaching him some basic sign language and that helped tremendously. Now when he screams I tell him to talk to me and he immediately signs it and says the word as well. I think it helped because he gave him something physical to do with his frustration.
When telling him to talk to me does not work, I put him in the other room and I tell him that I would be glad to talk to him when he is done screaming. It took some patience, but now he almost immediately comes back and is calm. It did not cure the problem overnight, but it has made a huge difference.

Hope that helps

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L.C.

answers from Denver on

First I would attempt to not respond to the screaming. I know it's hard but he'll continue to do it if it gets a response. Also, it is not to early to start signing. We started signing at 7 months, by 1 he was signing milk. By 18 months, 1/2 of my son's words were signs. Now at three he is an amazing communicator (can't say it is all about the signing) but it is easier developmentally for children to make signs than to speak and signing ultimately will help them talk better later. There are lots of books on how to do it. Introduce just a couple at a time until he begins to sign and then you introduce new signs as appropriate. There are two ways to go.. the baby signs (made up signs) or using actual American Sign Language. There are even board books and a baby einstein video with signs. It's everywhere. It is a lot of fun. I don't think it's necessary to take a class but htose are also available.

Good Luck

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A.K.

answers from Provo on

I know how hard this one is....my second daughter is a screamer. She is 17 months and can usually get us to figure out what she wants. When she starts screaming, I tell her to show me what she wants and hold out my hand for her to lead me to it. While you are at home with him, try talking to him, giving him options like, "do you want toast?" "Is this what you want" "can you show Mommy?" Even show him the items as you say them, it will help him link things together with words. And when you do have to say no and he screams, ignore it. I know thats hard, my youngest always wants to watch Shrek or Harry Potter (as strange as that sounds) and after awhile I HAVE to say no; she will scream for a while but then she finds something else to occupy her. If you "threaten" with something, like leaving the store to sit in the car...DO IT!! they learn fast that mommy says things and then doesn't do them. smart little farts lol.

Hope this helps!

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K.H.

answers from Colorado Springs on

He's a little bit young, but you could start signing with him. I've used the "Signing Times" DVD's with my daughter (now 18 months) and she's picked up all of them really quickly. It makes it easier on both of us. Good luck!

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E.

answers from Denver on

I'm sure you'll get many of these responses, but have you tried signing? It worked wonders for myself and my little guy

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K.

answers from Denver on

Does your little guy use any words at all? On "average" babies are using two to three words at this age. Also they use gestures to indicate some of their needs and wants, such as pointing, waving, shaking their head, etc. Does he babble using such consonants and such? There is a range for these behaviours so don't get upset. However, I think I would have him evaluated by an early childhood intervention service. It is free and they do an excellent job. I had my little guy looked at when he was very young and he had a speech delay. He understood language, but could not yet communicate his needs and wants so he screamed and was very frustrated with us. Due to early intervention services he no longer has a speech delay.

In Denver the services are called Childfind. I am not sure for Littleton. Your pediatrician's office should know. (By the way my son's pedi didn't catch the slight delay). This is just a thought and there probably isn't anything wrong, just thought I would give you this info. Best wishes:)

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