JFF - Am I the Only One Who Doesn't Find This Cute?

Really bright little kid trying to get what he wants. If his mom wants to go by Linda - that is between her and Mateo. My parents had friends when I was little who insisted we call them by their first names. Not disrespectful. Disrespectful would be disregarding their wishes. My son (until he was about 4) called all non related adults by their first names if that was how they introduced themselves.

I don't like that the mom says she will hit Mateo or if Mateo doesn't want to get hit, she will hit someone else (didn't catch the name) instead. THAT is manipulative. Also - she says she is 'asking' Mateo to do something. Kids are literal beings. When you ask, no is an acceptable answer. If no is unacceptable, you don't ask, you tell. Simple.

I heard no 'disrespect' in what the kid said. A child's job is not to obey his parents. It is to test boundaries in getting his needs and wants met. It is a parent's job to set and enforce these boundaries in a safe way.

And yes, it is very funny.

I agree with you. So many FB friends posted it and how cute it was. How cute is it going to be when he's a teen talking like this? And the obvious disrespect in his tone was horrible and something that probably won't change considering his mom thinks it's cute/funny enough to blast all over the internet.

I agree with you. Her name is Mom. And a negotiating 3 year old is obnoxious. All I could think of when I saw that is that he's mimicking someone else's a-hole behavior...his dad? A grandparent? He learned that somewhere, and it's not funny.

Sorry, I thought it was cute. He apparently does not always do this.

And I thought it was funny when our daughter called me by name. She only did i it once, because I was not paying attention to her and she was very serious about what she was trying to tell me.

Her little voice saying my name really got my attention. Of course she was also saying, "Excuse me, excuse me, L. Excuse me, I am using my words!

So not cute at all. If you have no authority over him at 3 what happens when he's 16? No doesn't mean no to this kid. And the disturbing thing is that instead of parenting the mom films this all and happens to mention spanking. He doesn't need a spanking. He needs to have rules enforced and be sent to his room if he doesn't follow them.

Nope, you're not the only one. I was dumbfounded that so many people find it funny. Sure, it is a little cute (his tone and inflection) for about a half a second.. and then it dawns on you that he is saying that TO HIS MOTHER. Not funny. Not cute. Not even chuckle worthy. It makes me cringe.

What is even worse, is imagining that this must be commonplace in his home, otherwise how would anyone (mom?) have known to be ready with the videocamera?!

I also doubt you have to wait "until he is older" for him to be a nightmare. Can you imagine trying to babysit that kid? Or being a sibling to that kid?
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Oh.. wanted to add (since we are being freely judgmental here ;) ) that I was also very put off by the whole scene. An adult (presumably, and likely his mother) seemed to almost be encouraging this behavior. And if wasn't outright encouraging to drag the arguing/convincing on more and more, it certainly was doing that by virtue of videoing it! We all know that if we give a kid attention for something, we'll get more of that thing.. right? Guess what she just taught that kid that it is good to do??

He's only 3! I think it's freakin hilarious. He's a tad sassy but mostly just cute and determined to get that cupcake. My neice used to call my sis and bro in law by their first names occasionally when she was trying to comfort or reassure them (she's very nurturing) and she grew out of it. I've watched the video several times and laugh out loud each time.

I thought it was actually kind of cute and very intelligent and not that he's a monster. Looks like I'm in the minority.
I'm not bothered in the least that he's not calling her "mom". My kids know what my name is and have used it. My name at birth certainly wasn't "Mom" and I was not "Mom" for the first 30 years of my life. My husband, family, friends certainly never call me "Mom" so they hear me called by my name all the time and know I respond to it. I don't see anything disrespectful there at all. My kids have never been disciplined or sent to their room for calling me by my first name. What a silly fight to pick!
Obviously that kid is always talked to like that. He sounds like his mom. Parroting. Treat the kid how you want them to treat you. Seriously. Respect the kid and they'll respect you. Treat them like a stupid puppy, expect them to nip back. You can still be in charge etc while being respectful. But even then, I didn't hear all that much disrespect outside of how I'm betting his talked to all the time. I don't see him intentionally picking a tone to be disrespectful, just the tone that's used in the house.
For a 3 year old, he was trying very hard to articulate his side. That mother could have handled it better. Obviously that kid is too smart for "because I said so" and I'm going to pop you on the butt because you didn't accept "because I said so".

Not cute.
Not effective parenting either.
What part of "No" are you not understanding?
I don't care about using the parents 1st name.
It's the incessant willingness to argue and debate and try to do an end run around Mom when she's said "No" that irks me.
And she videos it and posts it when she should be sending him to time out for sassing and back talking.
Makes me want to give HER a timeout.
Linda, listen to me - grow a freaking backbone already and don't let your 3 yr old call the shots.

I didn't like it at ALL.
I just imagine that that is how her husband speaks to her all the time. "LINDA...lookit, listen to me"
Somehow she has managed to make it look cute while I think it's disrespectful and my son or daughter would be sent to their rooms.
Bahumbug!
L.

I think there are a lot of younger parents that want to view this type of bratty behavior as being self confident. Nope, disrespectful.

Kids are not equal! That is entitlement, not talent.

And they wonder why us older parents find nothing attractive about their kids.

Okay watched it. My kids learned you nag, it gets you nothing. What they did was asked including all data points they felt were relevant, they usually nailed it. If I said no the discussion was over. They never whined or changed their argument, they walked away and tried to figure out what data was missing. They were allowed to ask why and I would honestly tell them the why. They didn't use that for a counter argument. They may consider it next time they asked but it didn't become a battle of wills.

I respected them enough to be honest about my reasons and they respected me enough to accept that is my decision. That is maturity, not saying Linda! listen! Lord!

The faces he makes are funny, but that's it.
The fact that Mom stands there arguing and recording him, while he talks back and is rude isn't cute at all.

Did anyone see this little boy and his mom on Ellen? He was sweet and shy on her show. His mom seemed really nice and extremely humble. Ellen gave the kid a huge table full of cupcakes and the mom a check for $10k! Let's just hope some Hollywood exec doesn't offer this kid his own sitcom.

I imagine the mom let his bad behavior go on for so long because she wanted to make a funny video to show her son when he grows up. And she probably never thought that the video would go viral.

We're making judgments on this entire family based on a one minute video. Personally, I was annoyed by the kid too, but I also thought he was pretty adorable. I agree with Kristin C that the public reaction to the video is more interesting than the video itself.

I did see it - clearly he's mimicking his dad. I foresee dysfunction in the future...

I agree, I didn't really like the video... I hate to see WHAT he will be like when he gets to school!

However, as an aside about him calling her by her first name....

When my niece was little, if she was trying to get her M.'s attention, she would say "M., M., M....... Sandy!" (Sandy is her M.'s name....) However, when she was trying to get her grandma's attention, she would say "Grandma... grandma.... grandma..... M.!" (not calling her M. this time, but trying to get grandma's attention ... she called her "M." because that is what she heard US call her!)

Just a really cute way to get their attention. She didn't do it all the time, just when we weren't really paying attention to her.

.... aaaaaand, at 41 seconds in, I was ready to pick him up and take him to his room. Interrupting is rude, his tone is rude, asked and answered, etc etc. That was as far as I could watch.

No, this is not 'little darling' territory. This is "you asked, I answered, you are continuing to be rude and cut me off, we are finished."

Instead, the parents think it's 'cute', the viewers (who do not have to deal with this annoying brat behavior) think it's cute, and so he is colossally rewarded for being a PITA. Not good. The mom must be a real ring-ding to feel like this is worth loading up online.... :(

FWIW: I'm rather 'meh' on the first name thing and more concerned with tone of voice. Maybe because I taught preschool for so long? That said, I think what bothers us most as parents is not so much the name used, it's that Matteo is speaking to his mother as though she were a PEER, instead of his superior. There's a difference there. I don't lord it over my son or the kids I cared for, but *I* am in charge, so bossing me around as though I were a peer doesn't cut it in our house.

And if she's threatening spanking, that means she's let it go on too long, period.

Nope. I didn't find it cute, either.

What I don't understand is why someone would post this on Youtube, thinking that everyone else would be interested in seeing it.

Little kids find out their parents' first names - it's what other people call them, so it's not a secret. And little kids will try those names out. They don't know why Daddy and the Grandmas and the other moms at preschool dropoff call mom "Linda" and they don't. Also, it is appropriate for small kids to know their parents' full names so that if they should become lost/separated and an adult/authority figure asks their parents' names, they don't say "Mommy and Daddy!"

I remember when I was in jr high, back in the 1980's, I knew a boy and his sister, who called their parents Mike and Carol. It seemed silly. My kids are not my equals. Even my young adult college student doesn't call me by my first name - although I do remember a couple of times being in public places and her using my first name, because if someone yells "MOM!" then 28 other women at the beach will turn around, not necessarily your mom.

Now, if a toddler/preschooler/any age kid is using a tone or words that are disrespectful, then I feel that they need to be reprimanded. I work in an elementary school and trust me, many kids are not being taught respect and how to speak to adults. It is a shame.

Part of me thinks it's cute and the other part of me says he deserve a spanking. For the record, they taught him their first names to use in case he ever got lost. When you ask many three yr old's what their parent's names are, they say "mommy and daddy".

I also wasn't a fan.

I thought it was one of the funnier videos I've seen. The boy is simply mimicking the behavior he's seen in the house.

I imagine his teachers are going to LOVE him when he starts school. :/

I found it kind of funny, but only because I know I will never have to deal with the kid. I don't let kids I don't know talk to me like that, let alone my own child. My daughter may try to negotiate with me once in a while, and I am open to discussing my decisions with her (and have changed my mind if she is able to give me a good, legitimate reason why I should...) she is respectful about it, and actually follows back-and-forth conversation, rather than interrupting and attempting to override/out speak me. BUT she knows that when I close the discussion, my decision is final.

I suppose if "Linda" wants to let her kid act like that now, she will get to enjoy the behavior when he gets older, and it isn't "cute" any more.

They have a dynamic in their family (talking back to mom) that I don't personally agree with for my family...but if I totally disconnected myself from the scenario...the little guy was cute and funny.

I'm a little late here, but, I was annoyed in the first 30 seconds.
Every man who has seen it (with the exception of 1 that I personally know) thinks it is SO FUNNY.
Every MOM I know does not. I don't think it is funny.
The kids point (if you were able to understand him) was basically, "what Linda says doesn't matter, this is not Linda's house its grandma's house"

I would have NEVER let my kids talk to me that way. at 13 and 15 they haven't yet. They know if they disagree with what ever "Rule" I have set, they can speak to me in a respectful manner, I may not change my mind but I will listen.

I thought it was ridiculous. Not cute one bit.

I didn't find it all that funny either!

he's an engaging and smart little fellow. but he interrupts endlessly and is not being taught how to listen respectfully. negotiating is a phase kids go through, and yes, it's a necessary one. but negotiating doesn't mean prolonged interrupting and discourtesy.
and the fact that she has to end up threatening a spanking is, i think, video-taped proof of ineffective parenting tactics.
why anyone would want the world to see THAT, i have no idea!
khairete
S.

V., I agree with you. Sadly, this is not cute. Mateo's mom thought that his little one is cute and funny that is the reason the kid is on YouTube. The problem is that disrespectful and overindulged children are annoying; they end up being too self-centered. In a few years, just a few years, her mom will be asking on this very same site why she cannot control her boy (!).
Sad isn't?

Hi Jff,
A co-worker showed me the video. I did not find it particularly funny but at the same time I could see how someone who does not have a child might find it amusing. I did hear the mom say something about giving the child a spanking or something if he kept it up. That lead me to belive he may have received a swat or two on the butt when the video was over.

I thought it was funny-ish. But at the same time, I was uncomfortable watching it. It just went on forever! My son calls me and my husband by our first names (has done so since he was 6) and I have no problem with that. And the child is obviously repeating what he's heard his dad (or another adult) say many times "Linda, honey, listen to me…", which does sound cute at first.

The more I watched, the more uncomfortable I became. Cute and disturbing at the same time. Mom lets it go on for way too long. Kid is simply doing what kids do, pushing the boundaries. Mom just keeps engaging him instead of shutting it down.

The internet reaction over this has been interesting, though.

Not cute at all. My daughter knows not to call me by my first name. I told her it is disrespectful.

I have PMS & found the video HIGHLY annoying & agree 100% with NYmetro. I first, would hit the Dad & then put the kid in time-out.

Nope not cute. And really not very funny either. Couldn't believe he made it onto the Ellen Show. Yawn.

For the moms who think it's okay to call a mother by her first name, (because you or your child did it), does not make it right.

You didn't find it cute but you sure did watch it and had to post on it. Next time dont look.