JFF ( Kinda?) Manners - Question of Teaching

I think more parents need to teach their children to have good eye contact when an adult is speaking them and when they are responding.

To teach proper etiquette, is to be the model of a person with good etiquette.

Whenever we asked our daughter to do something, we used the word please.. When she completed the task we said, Thank you for.... whatever the task was..

If we needed her help, again we asked please.. and then thank you..

She learned to say, yes, ma'am (or sir) and no ma'am (or sir) .. to anyone other than me and her dad. EVERY time.. This is because this is the way we speak to others..

Eating with ones mouth closed as Kista said is a must.. Reminding the child to eat small bites, so they can chew with their mouths closed. Do not talk with food in your mouth.

Also listening when people speak with us by looking at the person..

Holding doors open for everyone, that is about to come through a door. men, Women, even children..

Do not yel across the house. Go to the person and speak with them.

Do not use the cell phone, computers, ipods, ipads at the dinner table during a meal..

Do not use these in front of other people in front of them while you are visiting, excuse yourself to take an important call..

Learn to turn these items to silent or turn them on in church, movies.. etc..

Learn to shake hands and say, my name is L. it is nice to meet you 2boys..

Say goodbye properly.. Thank you for inviting us.

We are now leaving,
It was nice to meet you 2boys.

All the ones you stated. In addition, and we are talking ideally here, by them time they are 10 yo, I would like them to:

Be good guests: don't help yourself to things, don't invite yourself over, offer thanks for the invitation along with a reciprical invitation to your house, clean up after yourself, respect property.

Be good hosts: offer a snack or a beverage, let a friend have first say in activitites, make people feel welcome, thank someone for coming over and offering to do it again.

Little things like offering to do dishes at someone's house if dinner has been provided, or offering to help clear the table, complementing the cook and thanking him/her. Opening doors and letting others pass through.

Basically just graciousness and gratitude.

Just this week my 18 yo son and I were walking down the hall to go downstairs. We were side by side talking and when we got to the stairs he stepped back and waited for me to go first. That was the coolest moment ever. He didn't even think about it, it's just what you do.

My kids seem to have mastered the please, thank you, excuse me, but they need to work on taking turns, don't interrupt or insert yourself into adult conversations and if you must then say pardon me, cover your mouth/nose when you cough or sneeze (oldest one does, little one does not), don't talk with food in your mouth (pretty good about it), no commenting on people's physical appearance unless you are saying something nice (not an issue yet and I would like to keep it that way).

I would love for my dd to wipe her own poppy butt and stop feeding the dog the part of her dinner that she doesnt want. Also sharing with her baby brother would be nice. Right now we are working on only asking once for something, and not begging. She is doing well for me but still asks dad 500+ times since she knows he will give in, lol.
Also, Im not sure if its really a manners issue, but my daughter loves to talk about booby milk, how her brother drinks it, and how I have boobies that have milk in them ,ect, if she would stop that, it would be nice.

Not much at this point. At 4, he's well-mannered and others will comment on it, which is sad to me because the way he speaks and behaves was (at one time) very common. He's not this way by accident. We taught him to say please and thank you. We taught him to wait his turn. We taught him to say "Bless you" and "excuse me". We taught him to chew with his mouth closed and not to speak with a full mouth. He uses a napkin and utensils and asks to be excused before leaving the table.

It's not rocket science. It's parenting. If you want polite children, insist that they be polite. My nieces are HORRIBLE! To the point that we have stopped buying them gifts because of their commentary. I have yet to receive a verbal "thank you" let alone a written note. They complain about food, have terrible manners and throw tantrums when asked to behave otherwise. It is 100% my in-laws fault. They allow the behavior, so it continues. The funny thing is that they don't behave that way nearly as much in my home or in my MIL's home...

I like all the ones listed and we try to teach by modeling the correct desired behavior, and now our 3 and 5 year old even catch/correct mom and dad sometimes! LOL!

Another thing we like to instill is waiting for everyone to sit at the table and say grace together before eating, and now thye remind us to say grace even at places like McDonalds.

Something that is hard to teach my daughter is to take a compliment gracefully ( since I myself rarely get many verbal compliments for her to see me respond to), even if she doesn't agree with the complimenter. She has beautiful naturally curly hair, and I try to do some different cute styles with it, many times she doesn't agree with what I and many others deem cute....and throws a fit over it in the morning. Well, invariably later in the day, some passing person compliments her curls or her hair-do, and she just ignores them ( becasue she doesn't agree that it is cute and those people are validating what mom said, UHG!). I say to her "What do we say when someone pays us a compliment?" She usually mumbles "thankyou" under her breath - later I explain that those people would love to have hair like hers and are telling her something nice and when someone says or does something nice for use, even if it is not what we would choose or agree with, we need to thank them so they can hear us. Taking a compliment well, even if you don't particularly think your hairstyle or dress or whatever is the best/your favorite, is an important part of good manners - if we all start ignoring or snubbing complimentary people, they will stop giving compliments all together, please thank these kind people who are trying to make your day!

You have listed the basics and Lisa C. added some great ones!

I'd also like to add that I want my children to reply when spoken to. Listen when someone is talking to them and look them in the eye. Shake someone's hand when they first meet them and say nice to meet you. When they take a girl on a date I want them to go to the door to get her and walk her to the door after. Open her car door for her.

I would love it if my oldest (he's 8) would use a fork! I always have to remind him. Other than that he has good manners. As I hear it he has great manners when not at home. My youngest (she's 5) burps at the table when we're eating and does not say excuse me.

I would like my kids (8 and 4) to learn to sit up straight on their bottoms and not wiggle, bounce, lift their skirts, kick the table, play with their hair, etc. I am hoping the constant movement will eventually stop. But as adults I would really like them to sit up straight and gracefully.

I also value making eye contact and speaking clearly, not talking over someone and actually listening.