My Kid Won't Sleep

My son was like that also. Every time he came in my room, I let him fall back to sleep, then I put him back in his room. After waking up in his room for a while, he just started staying there.

My parents divorced when I was 7. I am so glad my mother never took any advice to force me out of her bed. I finally stopped going in with her when *I* was ready, about age 10. I will always cherish those times with my mom, knowing that although my dad was painfully absent from our lives, she cared enough about me to not care what others thought and loved me enough to know that the closeness and security I needed at night was imperative to my growing into an independent loving adult. It worked. BTW, she worked as a mental health counselor for 30 years. She holds two master's degrees and worked her butt off for us. She was not a stupid woman, she knew about developmental milestones of children and realized that forcing me out would cause more harm than good. Just my experience, but judging from the other advice here, I thought you might need another point of view.

When my daughter was younger she would do the exact same thing. I just kept taking her to her room no matter how many times she came over. You don't get a lot of sleep but in a couple of days they will stay in their own bed. I hope this helps.

I would say do it Supernanny style. Talk to him about it during the day - that he is getting so grown up and that you're proud of him for doing (insert accomplishments here). Then introduce the subject of his getting in bed with you and saying that "we are not going to do that anymore." Offer a small reward and alot of praise when he succeeds, and when he tries to get in bed with you keep taking him back to his room with little comment. He will eventually stop when he realizes that you won't give in. If you give in even once he will manipulate you seemingly until the end of time. Do not give in. Even when he is sick, keep him in his room and stay with him if you want. I would say before bed each night spend extra time cuddling with him and reading to him. Or if you can't do that, pick a time during the day. Plan fun things to do with him like hide and seek, drawing pictures, "nature walks" where you discover things, etc. If he feels he isn't getting enough attention from you during the day he will do what it takes to get it at night. Key words - DO NOT GIVE IN. The adjustment time will be alot shorter that way. He needs to know that he can be independent - that you have the confidence in him to be independent at sleeping through the night. And you need the sanity of having your bed to yourself and giving yourself uninterrupted sleep. What a gift. He will be proud of himself when he accomplishes this. It will help also to put into your routine: going to the bathroom, a warm bath, brushing teeth, going to the bathroom one more time, then a story, then bed. Good luck!
J.

my son did this when he was 3. He was up like 15 times a night. Everytime he did it I got up and put him back in his room. It took a long time for him to get the picture but he eventually did. I know it's easier to just let him sleep with you. I was a single mom too. I figured, what's the harm, and I kind of liked him sleeping next to me. I realized that when I eventually got married he would not be able to sleep with me anymore and I didn't want him to resent my husband for taking his place... Good luck!

GOOD MORNING
I totally understand your situation. I have a soon to be 6 year old that thinks mommie's room is his room. I think my " mommy bed nightmare" started alittle early. As a single parent I found comfort in cuddling with my baby, once his father left us. He was like a security blanket for me and as i was to him.
My mother constantly fussed about him being in my bed, so i decided to " try" him at sleeping in his bed.
at the time he had a toddler bed... now just imagine going from driving a big tahoe all your life then being forced into a micromini geo metro. and being told to just deal with it. thats how i think he seen his toddler bed compared to my queen size spacious bed. so then i purchased him a full size bed and decorated his room in the "all sports", THINKING HE WOULD LIKE IT. wrong he like the decoration but still refused to sleep in his bed. so of course i refer back to my mother for help because it was her idea in the first place that she had a problem with it. she told me when its bed time, instead of just leaving him
lay there next to him for a few moments until he fall alseep. this continue the "security blanket" feel for him.
I can truly say it work for a few weeks, then he somehow found his way back into my room around Midnight. I didnt have to look at clock each night when i was knee in my back or a hand in my face i know it was after midnight.
Once again I went to my mom with my problem about his midnight visits. she told me regardless how tired or how good the sleep is you have get up an take him back to his bed
lay there until falls asleep. but honestly it took a toll on my sleeping habits doing this, but it worked. ( give that a try)
I hope my experience with this helps you and your son.
I noticed you stated his father isnt in his life, think of it as His loss ( the father). Everyday you find yourself falling in love with your baby all over again as if it was the first time you layed eyes on him. from the corny knock knock joke to the just being a boy things he does. Remember you are his Queen.
cherish every minute, but also in heart find closure with his dad. we are quick to say "I dont care about him" which is a lie because when you look at the precious gift he gave you regardless how good or bad they are. you find yourself asking why does he chose to miss out on such wonderful child. as mothers we cant answer that, all we can do is answer the question about their fathers the best positive way we know how. and when the time is right and our kings are ready to confront their father, hold your head high knowing he is a product of your love and devotion. your son will know that and his father will see how wonderful of a man you raised.
good luck and take care :)

If I were you, when he comes into your room in the middle of the night, just tell him that he has to sleep in his own bed, and take him back to it. It might take a couple of nights or up to a couple of weeks of you taking him back to his room, but he'll get to picture soon enough that he has to sleep in his own room.

If your son wakes to use the bathroom, perhaps you could stop his liquid intake two hours before bed time and make sure he tries to use the bathroom before bed. Perhaps if he did not have to get up to go to the bathroom, he would sleep all night in his own room.

Don't force him out of your room if he comes in during the night, but suggest going with him to his room. You might fall asleep in his bed with him, but it makes him more likely to sleep in his own bed all night and eventually he'll go back to his own bed on his own without stopping to visit yours in the wee hours.

Good luck, A.

I was in the same situation , its feels like only yesterday. With my kids, I had two mommy sleepers, I guess even at their age, they felt that I was lonely, till this day my 9 year old sneaks in when my "new" husband leaves for work. Anyway, I use to go into their room at bedtime, read a book and cuddle before bedtime. Let them know I loved them and we would see eachother first thing in the morning, when things got to the point when I was getting no sleep, I would do the worst thing, but bribe them to stay in their room.... eventually they started sleeping by themselves, and so did I.

The only thing I can think of is to everytime he comes in your room, take him back to his room. Lay with him for a bit if you have to till he is comfortable being back in his room. After he is calm go ahead and go back to bed. I went through this with my daughter and that worked for me.. Let me know how it works.