Nearly 5 and Pooping Pants

Maybe she is lactose intolerent. My son had problems at that age with stomach aches. She may think its gas and accidentally have a partial bowel movement. Try little to no dairy and see what works.

I have to say that i think it is wonderful that you are jumping right on it. I still remember the name of a boy from over 20 years ago that used to do it in school. If only his parents took it seriously and tried to help him. We need more moms like you to pay attention and care when they see something like this!!

This is probably more common among children than what you think. Don't make a big deal about. Its frustrating I know and gross to clean but this really is normal.

She may not be wiping properly, holding it in or constipated. Monitor her fluid intake. She need to drink enough water in hte day. Watch out for things that are constipating and cut back on those e.g. bananas, yogurt, too much calcium products, etc.

Do a diet check and see if she is getting enough fibre. The best fiber comes from whole grains and fresh fruit and veggies. These are all things that kids are known for not liking. Maybe you could all overhaul your diet as a family to make way for more basic nutrition and ingredients.

L.,
Bowel control can be linked to some medical issues that should be addressed by your doctor. I wouldn't wait to call the doctor, good luck.
C.

L., my dear, listen. There are some things that it is perfectly normal to ask other moms their opinion / experience about. Like teething, best diaper brands, sleeping patterns, car seat brands and such. But I think that when it comes to medical issues, please don't hesitate to call your pediatrician. They are also trained to initially even address emotional problems in children and refer your child to a specialist if that is the case. Your daughter could have a bowel problem, nervous stomach for some reason or it could be behavioral. Whatever it is, I think you cannot rule things out without first exploring it. If that means you need to take her to the doctor, and I think you should, please do so. I don't doubt that you are a loving mama, so please don't make yourself feel guilty later that you did not take her to the doctor. Do whatever you have to do until you get this issue resolved. I always say, better safe than sorry. Good luck and I hope your little angel will be fine. God bless. :)

L.,
Get your girlie to the doctor. She told you she can't stop the pooping and she agreed to go. There is no reason not to rule out a medical issue. What kid would purposely poop their pants at a friend's house??? This would surely be asking for humiliation. It seems to me that she needs some help.

L.,
I'm looking at this from the perspective of a preschool teacher. 1) It doesn't sound like she is doing it on purpose- it may just be that she gets busy and forgets or holds it too long and it comes out before she can get to the bathroom. Try to take her into the bathroom every 1/2 hour to 45 minutes. Don't ask- just say "Ok honey- time to use the bathroom". If she says she doesn't have to go just tell her she going to try and its ok if she doesn't go.But make sure she sits on the potty. Get her back into a solid toilet routine.
2) With a new baby in the house,there are changes that happen and children are particuarly sensitive to any change in their normal routine. Children sometimes cope by regressing to behaviors you may have thought they outgrew. It happens. Try not to make a big deal about it because the more you threaten her or shame her, the worse she'll feel and it could take her longer to get over this small step backwards.
By all means, have her checked by her ped to make sure nothing medical is going on but it sounds like she is just reacting to the changes in her environment. I know it is frustrating but please try to take it with a grain of salt and remember, it won't last.
Best of luck.

Could be just getting back into school. Or you say she does it when she is with a friend? maybe she scared or gets too excited and forgets

If you read about encopresis and 'sneaky poo' on the web, you'll see that this is almost NEVER an on-purpose behavioural problem, is very common, and very terrifying for the child. They really have no control over it, so they need your compassion, support and empathy, and help from the doctor - not anger and frustration (easier said than done, I know).

We're having a similar problem with our son having loads of little poos each day, he's only 20 months, and still in diapers, but he's effectively got the same thing, just before he needs to be going to the potty by himself. If it continues it will be the same as you are saying though, so we've talked to specialists and are going to do laxatives for a week to try and break the cycle, we're praising him for his 'big' poos, and trying to not make anything negative about poos at all - the problem really stems from them trying to hold in poo when they are constipated, when they get worried about it hurting etc., and then their little bodies over-come them, and some leaks out anyway. That's partly why getting angry with them and asking them to hold it doesn't work - that usually IS what they are doing too much of anyway. Should make sense if you read more on the internet, but definately go to see your doctor sooner rather than later. Diet is a big part of it all, and plenty of fibre (veg, porridge for breakfast, brown rice etc), and plenty of water should also really help.

Good luck.

I actually don't have children, but I remember having a similar problem when I was a little girl. My stools were sometimes harder from not eating enough veggies and such, and I would begin to feel like I needed to go hours before I actually could. So feeling like I needed to poop verses actually being able to poop wasn't different enough for me to always know when it was coming. So... with that said, it may not be behavioral, but rather a need to add a few more fruits and veggies to her diet, while limiting the amount of prepared foods and corn syrups she eats. Hope that helps.

Hey, you're not alone in this. My son, who is 7 has been doing it too, and doesn't know why. We had him checked out & the doctor sent him for an X-ray. It showed him being severely constipated. He would complain of his stomach hurting. I don't think the stool would be all diarrhea either. It has been frustrating for us, too. I've been carrying pull ups & wipes in the car for such incidents, so it doesn't always have to ruin an outing. And before anybody gets on me about it being humiliating for him, he has put them on himself, and I think he understands that putting a pull up on him has really been so we can get him cleaned up sooner and still be out. Yes, he could regress, but again I think he understands about the ease of cleanup while we're out. He still does wear regular underwear more of the time. His doctor put him on Miralax. We're still having trouble, but the Miralax at least helps move things along. The dr. also recommended we talk to the psychologist in their office. We haven't done it yet, but we have appt.
Not saying these are what YOU should do, but they are things to consider.--with your doctor, of course.

Ours would do it at school, at home, and while we are out. We'd get mad because he might be 10 feet (+ - )from the bathroom and still do it, and not know why. That's how the constipation works-it can still seep around while there's a blockage, and then pow. Or something like that. Not a pleasant thing to picture, is it? Well,think physiology and science.

AND try not to act like you're mad at her. In light of the medical aspect, she probably can't help it and feels terrible. If I didn't understand my son's doing it, how could he know what was going on.

Please work with a doctor and psychologist. And give your daughter a hug--she probably needs one. Stress (from condemnation) associated with a problem like that doesn't help.

Let me know how you make out, and I can fill you in on ours, too.

Maybe she has gas and when she tries to expel it she acidentally poops. Does she have complete bowel movements? Has her diet changed in any way? I guess it would be worth a doctors visit if the behavior continues. Good Luck!!

You need to call the doctor. Please don't wait. Nobody on this board is as qualified to speculate on this as your pediatrician.

It sounds like she may be dealing with constipation, and some is slipping out around the obstruction. She really can't help that when it happens. I would definitely take her to the doctor to see what they say. They may just tell you to use Miralax (they'll tell you the dosage). That's what my pedi told me when my 4 yo was getting constipated. He actually started taking it occasionally when he was 3. Once you know what to do, you can watch for signs and catch it before it gets this bad again. Your poor daughter must be very unhappy with it herself if she's so willing to go to the doctor for it. I hope you can get it figured out soon!!

I had a similar thing happen to my son and I when he was around 7 or 8 and all it was that he was too busy and held his BM and then it just came out. An old Doc told me to give him a gentle laxative every night for a week to regulate him that he will go in the morning and lo and behold it worked. He is now 40 and still goes in the morning I guess after coffee. It is as embarassing for them as for you, try to hold in there.

I would take her to the doctor. I most certainly would NOT threaten her with diapers!

My daughter had the same problem when she was your son's age. I discussed this with her pediatrician and he said it sounded like she was constipated. He gave me a laxative, I beleive it was called Miralax, and it worked itself out. No more problems! Good luck.

I read your responses down to "A B in Reno" and thought her response was the only one that got anywhere near what I suspect is the true problem. Things to remember: Kids who are being emotionally neglected will often act out in order to get a response, even if it's a negative response! And pooping pants at age five is a form of regression. I'm not a psychologist but my understanding is that "regression" in kids happens when a child is either expected to or is trying to grow up too fast. Many of you described just such situations with mother working or separated from Dad, etc. The remedy? Why not experiment with things that will give you control instead of feeling such a lack of control as a parent? i.e. give the child more hugs, more close time with you, more fun time. Let us know if that works.

L.,
If you are so sure it isn't behavioral, why NOT take her to the doctor to see if there is a physical reason that this is happening? Seems like she already knows that she can't control it. Maybe SHE's right and there is a need to see a doctor.

Personally I think she is just having too much fun, or is preoccupied doing something, to think about going to the bathroom. I'd try reminding her every once in a while. And try not to make such a big deal of it. It only adds to the stress and humiliation.

Be matter a fact about it. Buy her some diapers and say in a supportive way "Well, we can't have you pooping in your panties so I got you some diapers just like (siblings name). Now if you have an accident it will be in a diaper". She'll probably get the point.

Sounds like a trip to the pediatrician is a good idea. Could be some level of impacted bowel.