Me and my big stupid mouth. My husband has an aunt that is also writing a book, (so am I), and I told her about the Florida writers conference they have each year. I figured she might be interested in it, I learned a lot. Well, she was. VERY interested. She pops up and says, "Hey maybe we can share a room!" Hey, how about not.
I like her, I do, but I've only met her three times. I can not imagine anything more uncomfortable than sharing a room with someone I barely know. Besides this is a time for me to get away from everything and relax, while also gaining some valuable information about my craft. Any ideas on how I can tactfully request different rooms?
Heather, LMAO. I thought about that. Honestly, I usually do sleep in the buff so, it WOULD be true, sort of. :)
Looks like the aunt actually already booked her room, a single room. Yay, off the hook!
I'd tell her that I'm planning to write while I'm there away from my family and I need solitude to do it. Perhaps you could meet for lunch?
Most serious writers would understand that.
"No, ma'am, I am looking forward to walking around naked. As soon as I hit the door, I am dropping my drawers, and you shouldn't be present for that." Say it jokingly, but mean it.
Take your notes and your computer with you and write on your book while you are there. Tell her that you need to be alone so that you can concentrate on your writing. And mean it. Tell her that she probably needs to do the same thing. Separate rooms, J. - and a few meals together downstairs. This way you can get to know her, yet not have to stay with her.
Dawn
Book a single right now without telling her.
If it comes up again.....Oh I got a great deal on a single but I had to book it right then. Maybe you can get a room next door?
Bleck, I'm with you. I would not be able to relax sharing a room with many people, my kids, my guy, and a couple of sisters exempt of course.
:)
A simple, "no, I don't like to share rooms" is fine. It's clear and to the point.
I would be honest with her. Email or call her, whichever is more comfortable for you, and tell her, "I am super excited that you want to come to the conference, but I've been thinking that it'd be better if we didn't share a room. I REALLY need this time away to collect my thoughts and unwind. Maybe we can ask for rooms close to each other, though?"
Oh Aunt ________, that would be great if we were taking a fun vacation, but what I learned from last year's event was to not share a room because I have put myself on some serious deadlines and plan to work late into the night--waking in the middle of the night, etc.
I have saved all year to be able to afford the luxury of doing that. But, lets look at the conference brochure and see if there are any workshops that appeal to both of us and be sure to sit together at those!.
SO with you. honestly, even with friends, if i can afford to stay alone i will. sometimes sharing a room is necessary, and often it's fun if it's with the right BFFs but i like to read late into the night, and who doesn't want to feel free to belch and snore and fart at will?
;)
your only choices are to do it and hate it, or find a courteous way to demur. 'oh, it would be so fun to get to hang out together! i do hope you go. i can't share a room, i'm afraid, but if you attend, let's plan to sit together!'
don't offer explanations. if she's crass enough to inquire (most people aren't) have a polite non-committal 'i do so much better when i'm away from home if i'm on my own.' (if it were true that i had sleep or health or some other issue i might mention it, but i myself would not white lie about it. i know it works for a lot of people, but it makes me feel all oogly.)
good luck!
:) khairete
S.
I think you had the perfect opportunity to say 'no' when she said 'Hey maybe we can share a room!' I imagine you were caught offguard so hopefully whatever you said didn't leave the door open to her believing that you will or want to.
Unfortunately I have no real advice since if I were in your shoes I probably would have done the same thing and been looking for a tactful way to back pedal too ;-)
Find hotel rooms with ajacent doors so she feels like she has company but you also have privacy.
Be honest. Tell her that this is your special time, and you need quiet to reflect on the information you're learning at the conference. Suggest you get together at the conference and have a meal together, so sit together at a workshop, etc.
