Non-custodial Parent Suffers Traumatic Brain injury...need Direction

You don't need "all the information" about his condition. You need to know the information regarding child support. If your daughter would like to know how her father is doing, at 13 she can call her step mother and find out.

You need to contact an attorney to find out how to go about this. If the CS was auto deducted, then it will likely be auto-deducted from the disability check, but be aware that with a reduced income the amount may change.

When he is out of the hospital and in the rehab center, I would suggest that YOU go out and see him with his new wife and ask about revisiting the custody agreement in light of the new circumstances. Until the doctors have an approximation of his recovery, you really shouldn't make any changes to the visitation- just make sure that the CS is back in place.

This is all VERY new, so bringing it up before he is released for rehab care would be in very poor taste (unless you are unable to provide for your daughter without it).

I understand if you are unable to provide for your daughter, that financial support may be on your mind. Please don't bring this up around your daughter. Your concern right now should be about your daughter and your ex-husband. This is very traumatic for your daughter and could permanently shape how she copes with pain and seperation.

She is old enough to understand that the injury has effected his cognitive abilities. Talk to the wife and let her know that the 2 of you will be coming to visit. Go with your daughter and be there for her. If she wants to talk to her step mother alone, let her. Do not bring up any of the financials at this time though as it would be very tacky and insensitive. This woman is watching her husband suffer and is living that every day.

It may be best if your daughter only goes in the room while he is asleep if there is a chance he may act violently. Allow her to talk to the nurses and doctors who are caring for her dad. She needs to feel involved so she doesn't feel isolated. Let her go into the room and hold his hand. She needs to be there for her father even if for her own sake.

Your daughter needs to see him. What a selfish step-mom. Trust me, I was raised seeing my dad near death since I was a young child (he had many leukemia complications)... it was worse not seeing him.. not knowing if you would never see him again. From what I understand, your daughter has the right to go to the hospital and see him. She just needs to go to the desk and tell them she's his daughter. If you have questions call the hospital, just ask them if your daughter will be permitted to visit. She is over the age of 12 so it should be fine. That his not a right in the step mother can take away from his biological child.

Also, people with brain injuries, under sedation or whatever can still feel touch and the presence of their loved ones. My father told us so many times how he would feel comforted even though we didn't know if he was actually 'there'.

As for your legal questions, definitely consult an attorney, it's sounds like you've gotten good advice there already, so I'll leave it at that.

I don't know if she has to apply for social security first or not. But I have had parents that had X-husbands that had died or were on disability. They did tell me they applied separately. I also had a mom once tell me that whens he applied for her children that another X also applied and it limited what her children could get. So I would call social security and see. But since it takes a long time to be deemed disabled and put on soc. sec., I wouldn't expect anything to happen very fast.

I would contact to Attorney Generals Office. They would be the best to ask about the child support issue. As far as your daughter's rights to see her father, I think I would contact an attorney for a free consultation and have your questions answered on that issue.

As someone who was in this field at one time awhile ago, I suggest you contact the social work department where he is at. Explain your concerns and understand that HIPAA does stop you from getting certain information. I can almost guarantee that if he has suffered a severe TBI, that the social work department or other department within the hospital is helping with gaining his Social Security benefits, so let them know that he also has a minor child or call Social Security on your own and inquire about your daughter's needs now that her father is disabled. She will most likely, if he is approved, receive a check also. The SSA website is also filled with good information. With almost any TBI, the facility will want to involve the family because there is sometimes a dramatic change in a person and a great deal of support is needed. I am going to assume that someone is also gaining conservatorship of him as he is no longer going to be able to make most decisions. That is just usually what happens and it will probably be is wife. Understand that there is a long road ahead for everyone and understand that his current wife might think she is doing the right thing at this time. Be patient and understanding. Also, use your school counselor. Let the school counselor know what is going on so he/she can provide some assistance as this will be an adjustment for everyone.

well, my father recently had a traumatic brain injury. the situation is very different seeing im 26 and of legal age. i dont think they can deny her the right to see her father in the hospital, her being the next of kin, regardless of her age. but im not sure.
but, from experience with having my father in such a position, it was very hard to see him like that. he didnt know who anyone was, he had no sense of anything what so ever. in fact, he kept ripping the covers off himself to expose himself because he was hot and didnt realize he was naked under the gown. they had to have him tied down the majority of the time to stop him from hurting himself and that was very hard for us kids to take.
if your ex seems like hes going to pull through this, then maybe it would be best to wait until he goes to a rehab center for her to see him. but of course, if hes in a really life threatening place you dont want her to be denied seeing her father.
just prepare yourself and her for how bad it can be and what you may see you wish you didnt.

I would go get a free consultation with a Family Law Attorney. They will have all your answers. And the correct answers.

T. I am so sorry. The same thing happened to my father in 1995. Motorcycle accident with brain injury and everything. My father can never recover from his brain injury and 99% of the time he doesn't even know who I am. I had to leave once because he was angry because he didn't believe I was his daughter. All his memory is still there from before his accident but as us kids grow older we changed and he still thought of us from before his accident. Your daughter should be able to see her father. You should have step mom prepare your daughter for all the injuries and be very honest with everything that is going on. I remember going in to see my father and ever bone in his face was broken, wire coming out of everywhere, the breathing machine and everything else. It helped me when I first saw him because I was prepared for what I was going to see. All this happened a week before my 15th birthday so I know how hard it is.
The child support stuff will all work itself out. As long as you have a court order for the support then you will be all set. If it was coming directly from his paycheck like a direct deposit type agreement that the 2 of you had then you might want to contact your child support office so they can set something up.