Moms, how do you deal with your husband's nasty habits?? I need advise and help as to how to deal with a slob. Yes, i said slob. My husband is a big fat slob. we have this rule where the inside of the house is my doing and the outside, yard and all is his doing. I always have the house clean, and he helps me by picking up and not making or leaving a mess, but my husband has a huge mess outside and I am not about to clean the yard. I already clean enough inside and if i start cleaning outside he will get use to it and never do yard work, figuring i will end up doing it. So, i want to know how do you deal with nasty habits. I've told my husband nicely and mean sometimes to clean, to wash. We have two dogs and there's hairs all over the porch, the dogs are digging holes in the back. I'm so tired of it. Besides, he doesn't like to throw anything away so he's piling things up, kinda hoarding it outside, that habit of his is driving me nuts. we can't even have our friends over because its so messy its embarrassing! Oh, but he keeps his car spotless! As of work, he has time, works part time and on the weekends he does nothing so he has a lot of time. I just don't know how to get him to actually clean. I've told him to hire somebody to clean but he doesn't want anybody "touching' his mess.
BTW, we have been renting this small home for ten months now, before that we were in a studio apt, where he had no yard so therefore he never had to deal with "cleaning' outside.
Thanks
Remind him that if he doesn't get it cleaned, then the neighborhood association can fine you guys.
Also, tell him that it's his job to clean it. If he doesn't it will be cleaned regardless and you ILL hire someone out of HIS budget to clean it up.
Lazy, nasty slobby people make me sick! They really can ruin things for everyone out of selfishness and lack of concern for others.
Does he know what you expect? Maybe not...
Personally, I would put out an ultimatum... "You have until Saturday to get that $*@! mess cleaned out or I am ordering a dumpster and tossing it all!". If he doesn't believe you, then let him be a little taken aback when you make the call and the dumpster shows up in the driveway. Go through the pile of junk and trash anything that doesn't have a "purpose" or a "place".
When you're done, clean the porch and fill in the holes... then let him know that this is what you expect the outside to look like. You don't have the space or time for the junk habit and you'll trash it all again if it piles-up.
j
Let him know that if certain projects aren't taken care of by January, then you'll be hiring and PAYING someone else to deal with them. Go ahead and call around and get some estimates. Let him know how much this is going to cost and what he'll be giving up to fund it. If he still does nothing, go ahead and hire away!
You may also want to mention to him that if your landlord comes over and sees his mess, you may find yourselves without a place to live.
I understand where all the other women are coming from with the ultimatums. With most men that just doesn't work. You simply get on the phone and call the city and make a complaint about the property conditions and watch this ripple into action. Act surprised. You may also consider speaking with your landlord about this but that could be sketchy too. Hubby needs to hear about this from anybody else other than you which would sadly probably work better than him hearing it from you. Just my 2 cents in the matter.
What a headache! Suggest a cleaning crew come in once a week until he can keep up his end of the deal. You will budget this by not buying him his extra goodies he likes at the supermarket such as alcohol, cigarettes, candy or what ever he likes. My husband pays my cleaning lady $75 a week for this reason. After a while he will get the picture and start cleaning up after his own mess! If that doesnt work be preparred to go on strike until he can help. It will be unpleasant, but hopefully it will work out.
Send a fake letter from the landlord about the mess in the yard!
If I were you, I would call and get a dumpster delivered, I would put on my work gloves and go outside and clean it up.
If its that bad that you are too embarrased to have friends over, then it must be pretty bad. It needs cleaned up before a neighbor reports you and you get a health code violation. Or your landlord stops by and see's it, he may evict you for keeping the property in such poor shape.
If hubby won't clean it, then you need to clean it. Just my two cents. Good luck!
Okay, well I know messy husbands can be hard to deal with, I have my moments with mine too, but I have to just say that if you have an agreement that he does the outside and you do the inside, then I don't see that you have a huge argument here. I get that it's annoying that you're doing "your part" and you want him to clean up out there, but if you don't have to deal with it at all, then I guess that's good right?! Maybe a little bit?! ;)
Ultimately I understand why you want it cleaned but I'm not sure it will happen. Maybe you guys can talk about it and set up a plan to clean/put away certain parts or items each weekend. Have him pick one thing and maybe you pick another and agree that it has to be done by the end of the weekend and he can have all week to work on it or he can do it all in one day. If it continues I would probably just go ahead and hire someone to deal with it but not until you've talked about it with Hubby and tried again.
Hello!!
How I would handle it? I NEED this mess cleaned up. We are partners - I do the instead - you do the outside. If you cannot do your portion, i will pay someone to do it. that means money out of your budget for XXX.
Give him a set amount of time to do it and then follow through. Not sure where you live in San Diego - my brother lives in Escondido and he and his son do odd jobs like this - help clean up a mess. I don't know what he charges for it.
Tell him to watch the tv show "Hoarders."
i'd hire someone myself and take it out of HIS christmas fund, or if you split bills, take it out of your portion of the bills
