Nurturing....natural Gift or Something Learned?

I do think I am a natural nurturer. I was not nurtured very much growing up but I WAS put into a position at a very young age where I had to take care of my younger siblings. So maybe it was a forced development rather than a "natural" state of being?
And it's not just children/people, but plants and animals as well. I do get a fair amount of satisfaction taking care of living things, and I have been told I have a LOT of patience (which is surprising because I sure don't feel like it most of the time!)

I think you're born with it, and if you aren't, you can train yourself to nurture. My mom is EXTREMELY nurturing by nature. She was a nurse for 30+ years who will nurse any animal or human and cares for all people and animals very affectionately. She's always been very nurturing, even as a child according to my aunt and uncle (also both very nurturing). They were raised with NO affection. They had very cold, detached, abusive and mean parents.

My dad is more detached. He's not mean, but he's NOT nurturing. His mom and dad were pretty nurturing.

I've always been a nurturer. Super cuddly and understanding. I'm also strict, but very very nurturing. My husband is affectionate, but less "in touch" with being nurturing. His parents were not nurturing-well his mom was in a weird manipulative way....

I think it's a type. It doesn't seem to necessarily always depend on what one's parents were like.

I agree with "the both" answer. While I am naturally a nurturer, I was not very nurtured as a child. So i have had to fight to enable to my natural 'nurturing' instinct to come through. Does that make sense???

Nurturing is both a gift and something that can be learned or enhanced. I'm like you. Nurturing to a point, but then my patience wears thin. I was actually more patient and nurturing before I had kids! With the every day, 24/7 aspect of parenting, nurturing is something I have to make a conscience effort to work on. I find that taking time to nurture myself allows me to be more nurturing with my children.

I think it's both! There are absolutely some people who were just *built* more nurturing than others, as with any trait. But just because you have to work at it, doesn't make you less nurturing. Make sense?

Generally speaking, I think I'm a born nurturer. Of course I have my days where I'm short on patience, but who doesn't?

I think there are people that naturally are nurturers.

I also think that others can be taught or treated with such compassion that they learn to also give this care and love.

There are some people that this is not something that they are comfortable with, or as with one of our nephews, he has Aspergers, and does not have the ability at this nuance.

By nuturing I presume you mean caring for the needs of others, your children. All beings need care in some way or another and to some degree or another. I happen to be naturally nuturing but then again I have my times that I need rest or space for a while. I think a naturally nuturing person tends to see the needs of others and the want for helping them. But sometimes not helping is more helpful. Sometimes helping a little is more helpful. One must try to see clearly anothers needs and not just put their own stuff in it just because they're the type to nuture. I also think everyone has their limits and must maintain balance.

Anyone can learn to be nuturing to a child as long as they actually want to. Nuturing is a matter of love and giving that love from self in a selfless manner. Children need warmth and kindness and calmness, but that doesn't mean we're always going to be so perfect as to be able to give it in such a perfect manner all the time. But kindness and such doesn't necessarily mean giving in to whims or being fluffy or such, it means being good for goodness sake and doing and saying kind things; thoughtfully responding, keeping things light. (at least continually aiming for this)

Balance is key. You may be going from one end of the spectrum to the other and that's why the transition isn't so smooth. Try to practice balance - watch your words and reactions and actions whether you feel nuturing or not. Practice responding after thoughtful consideration and how you want to respond in a calm fashion. This usually just takes a few extra seconds or minutes. No one says you have to respond immediately to anything. I learned this after realizing finally I was saying things I wished I hadn't.

Yes, nurturing attitudes can be learned. The fact is everyone nutures something in their life -- it can be something productive or counter productive. It could be watching tv, it could be kniting, it could be nuturing a particular habit of thought that is good or not so good. So when we begin to think of things in this way perhaps it changes outlooks.

Well could you define nurturing? I nurture and sure it is natural because to me all that nurturing is is giving your kids what they need to thrive.

Now do I do all that baby talk, touchy feely stuff, no! Not my personality and by proxy not the needs of my kids who are very much like me.

I think it is funny because the all over their kids look at me with my kids and say we are cold, yet my kids look at them and think they are annoying, ya know?

There are different ways to nurture, and some come naturally and others don't. I tend to think that if your children know they are loved, and you are clear and consistent in setting rules and boundaries, and if they do get a reasonable amount of attention, they're fine. And different kids need different sorts of nurturing as well. Verbal encouragement is nurturing. Judicious praise is nurturing. Separation is nurturing for independence.
What I'm good at without really trying is talking them through physical challenges, like on play equipment, without taking over or holding them too much. What I have to work on is not using a sarcastic tone (my daughter has picked this up from me) when they ask stupid questions. They are five and three; the questions aren't stupid for little kids, but I have to keep reminding myself of this. I need to use far less sarcastic language when they are asking questions in order to avoid doing something. I am sometimes good at facilitating social interaction with my daughter, who is shy, sometimes not.
What helped me before we moved was a moms' group. I modeled some of my communication habits on one of my friends in particular who was really good at it. Other moms were fine, but I didn't want to model them. This is why having a group is helpful. You'll find at least one person you can learn from. We're all learning and doing our best, honey. Just make sure that if you think you did snap, apologize. It's ok to say enough is enough, if you do it kindly and your kids do get your attention.

I think you're born with it.
You either have it or you don't.
Kind of like you either have a beautiful singing voice or don't.
I never thought of a nurturing side to myself but when I marrried my husb I helped take c/o his child. I helped take care of her when she was sick (I was always the one that heard her cry out in her sleep....he was dead to the world), I played w/her, showed her things, took her places, bought her things, took her for fun outings etc.
When my child came along, I felt those same maternal feelings.
They just came naturally.
Wanting to make sure my baby was cared for, protected, had all my baby needed etc.
Again, I think it's a natural instinct.
That doesn't mean you can't refine it or what have you.