I have a 2 1/2 year old daughter and when she was 18 months we decied to put her in a private daycare she did not last but 4 days daycare called me she was making her self throw up and did not want to deal with it, so we stop daycare, recently we decied it was time for her to go since she is a little older she only goes for one day out of the week to get used to the daycare, she cried when we left her and when we pick her up, she told us that we do not love her anymore for leaving her there and that she does not want to go back again Any sugestions???
Is there a reason she HAS to go to daycare once a week? If not, why send her when she can stay at home with mom or dad and learn manners, social interactions, etc...
I wouldn't send her back. She is only 2.5 and there is plenty of time for her to become comfortable in a "school" environment before she starts preshool.
Why don't you see if there is a Mother's Day Out program around you that you could volunteer at? This would allow you to put your daughter in an environment with other kids and you'd still be close by.
That is what kids do. She is trying to make you feel guilty. When she says this to you, simply tell her the reason you put her in daycare, and then tell her you love more today than you did yesterday and tomorrow you will love her even more.
DO NOT try to reason with what she is saying when she tells you you don't love her anymore. If she says it back to you after you've done the abive, just remain quiet and tell her that, THAT conversation is over for today and if she's like to play in the park or whatever activity you have plan, even sitting in your lap, then she's more than welcome to do it with you.
NEVER TRY TO PROVE YOUR POINT TO A CHILD. Say it once, and remain quiet. Steer the ship. Tell her the conversation is over. Then remain silent.
Hi A.. Bless your heart and hers. I have an in-home daycare and what I have done is have the parents spend some time here with me so that they both feel comfortable. Maybe if she feels like she is in a place where you have been and played with her, she will remember the fun. Also, other kiddos love to show off to the parents of their friends so maybe if you spent some time with your daughter and the other kids you could talk to them and let them tell you both what they like to do. I am really big on hugging my kids and interacting with them. Is your caregiver like you and do the things that you would with her? Best of luck to you both.
P.
I'd try to talk to her about her new "friends" and about her "big girl school" to get her excited about what she's doing. I'd also learn the names of some of her classmates and find out something they have in common and share that with your daughter outside of school time. For example, when she wakes up on the school day, say something like, "Today is a school day! Your friend Emma will be there and she loves Ariel just like you do! I am so excited for you because you're going to have such an interesting day!"
Try doing a mothers-day-out program instead of 'daycare'. They do a lot of learning activities and she might just have a blast. They usually do 2 days a week for about 5 hours each. Can't hurt to check it out.
Good Luck,
A.
Daycare is rough specially in the beggining. Mommy's Day out programs are offered at local churches and I have found that the ladies that work there are very pleasant and patient with children and the number of kids per group are kept very small and manageable. Daycare, there are far too many kids for the caregivers to give specialized attention to a child that misses mommy and transitioning into that type of massive setting could be daunting. If you take her only once a week she won't have enough time there to get to like it and by the time the next week rolls around she nursed her wounds of abandonment and thinks all is well when it's time for her to go back.
Kids need socialization and they flourish in the company of other children their age but it's hard to let go for that one, two or three days a week.
My son (and I) cried for 3 weeks every time I dropped him off at mommy's day out, he was miserable for 5 minutes then got over it once they started to play. Now he gets angry when I pick him up because he loves it.
Be sure to do your homework on the place and feel good about where you're entrusting her care and if you know they are caring and kind you'll have the peace of mind when you drop her off. She might not like it the first couple of weeks but hang in there, you both will be so happy you did.
Good luck!
