Should I Tell Them or Not?

I would tell them. Being cruel to animals usually means there is something else wrong. That is a cry for help in my opinion.

That is a HUGE RED FLAG there! That kid has major issues that need to be addressed! YES do tell his parents. If they get mad at you, oh well. Let them. But at least you alerted them of their sons behavior. And no his behavior is 'not' normal. A child who grows up killing animals, or anything like that, like frogs, is headed down a disasterous road ahead. The first thing that I think of is what T is thinking about when he does this to the frogs? Where is his compassion? There isn't any and that really could lead to some major issues later on if he doesn't get help. Tell his parents and let them deal with it and if I were you, T wouldn't be allowed over to my house again. I really hope that boy gets the help he needs.

The FBI profilers say that being cruel to animals as a child is something that allmost all serial killers have in common. I would say something to his parents, & I wouldnt let my kids hang around him either. I wouldnt be angry with someone for telling me something like this about my kiddos ( even though noone wants to hear that kind of thing)

Tell them. For the child's sake, please tell them. It is disturbing.

uumm YES.. omg... that is disturbing behavior... and I wouldnt let my kids play with him, just saying...

OMG! Yeah I would tell! If MY child was behaving like that, someone BETTER tell me!!

OH MY GOD!!!

YES!! TELL THEM! And meanwhile, you need to tell him YOURSELF that he is harming living creatures and to CUT THAT OUT!

It's a good thing that little boy didn't do something like that around ME. That would have been the last time he ever hurt a frog.

By the way, when I was little, I remember boys putting firecrackers in frogs' mouths and throwing them in the air, and I don't believe all those boys turned into serial killers. That's just what can happen when boys are unsupervised and their parents don't teach them to love little living creatures. So if his parents aren't going to teach him, then maybe you can show him how to love a frog.

My sister told a neighbor boy's mom about him mutilating frogs in her yard and the mom laughed and said, "every kids does that!". Sick, sick, sick. My sister was so mad! I hope your neighbors have a better response and reign their son in.
Being cruel to animals is NOT normal and it should be stopped! You are doing them a favor by speaking up.

Yes I would tell them, it is not normal for kids to want to torment live creatures. It could escalate into cats, dogs, etc....then people..if they get mad, they get mad.....hopefully a sitter was home with the 6 yr old that night, or much older sibling. That just isnt normal behavior...ewwwe

YES, oh my goodness!

OMG! This is so awful.

Yes, you should tell them, but try to do it in a calm way. Just say you are noticing this.

Put yourself in their place by saying, "I am telling you this, because I am sure you are like me and would want to know."

Or, "I would want to be informed so I could do something about this."

um, so totally NOT normal!! You should absolutely tell his parents. If I were you I'd be sitting in their driveway when they get home.

Not to get all alarmist on you, but harming animals like this can be a sign of a sociopath. DEFINITELY tell his parents.....and keep a close eye on any pets you might have.

Cool you have a future serial killer next door to you. Considering it is a product of environment not sure if telling your neighbors will help or have him turn his attention to you from the frogs.

I would actually contact the police if I were you. That is some scary stuff.

Carp I just realized I typed cereal instead of serial, time for a nap.

Yes yes yes tell them. Your gut on this is right. Torturing animals is a huge warning sign of a future of violent behavior against humans. They might get mad at you, but they need to know about it.

There are three things that are common about childhood among serial killers. Its actually called the "serial killer trio"

1.standoffish antisocial personalities while coming of age (later in life they usually learn to be quite charming)

2. repetitive bed-wetting after the age of 5

3. torturing and murdering small animals (not just killing them, but doing something that they can watch actual torture)

I would want to know, even though i would be horrified, if my child was doing this. I would tell the mom and i would NOT exclude details. She may come at it in a surprisingly great....or awful way. But at least you can know you did the right thing.

Wow - um, yes, tell them.

And I bet they do know of his cruel behavior - they may just not know about this specific incident.

Wow.

I really hope you can go to some lengths to get this kid some help. Please do NOT let the parents or anyone else try to convince you this is normal child behavior.

I wouldn't let my kids near this kid.

I wish you so much luck!

You have plenty of people saying what I think. Yes tell them. But to take it a step further..... You say they are very passive in thier parenting. Is that a fair assessment? What do you think the outcome will be? Will they take action or laugh it off? And, You are good friends. But, It's hard, even with friends to know what goes on behind closed doors. What if something is going on at home that is causal? Taking these 2 things in mind, if your kids go to the same school, could you handle this a little differantly? I dont mean go tell on him. But, maybe go to school psychologist 1st and ask hypothetically, what they think of that kind of thing and what they reccomend the parent do in that situation. Then, when you go to your good friend, you have the right words to use and some reccomendations to make. You could suggest introducing the school pyschologist to your firend. If she doesn't take action and the behavior continues, then go to pyschologist and fill them in as to who it is, so they can talk to him and keep a closer eye on him.

Yes, do tell NOW.

Also...do not leave your children unattended with any of these children. Keep in mind that many sociopaths start this way.

Torturing animals is a danger sign. I'd call CPS and ask them what to do in this situation. This is totally not normal.

Tell them. If they get upset, then just leave them be.

I have a son who is 6 and you better believe I would want to know...so I could have is butt in a child psychologist's office ASAP!!!

If my 6 year old was killing anything larger than an ant...I would be so worried that I would be seeking immediate intervention!!

Well, yes...I would most definitely tell the parents. If the parents don't seemed phased, call CPS.

If you have your own pets, I'd be very worried. Kids like this don't stay with frogs for long. I also would NEVER let this little hellion around my children, but that's just me.

I would tell them in a polite way. But the major question is,when the parents are not home Who is watching the little one?

This child is a serial killer in training. Find a way to get him some help.

I would call the school too just to let the school counselor know you have witnessed this behavior. They will often observe the kids behind the scenes and be able to see if they are exhibiting cruelty to other students.

If your kids go to the same school you could just pop in the counselors office and ask them if you could have some advice, then tell them the actions, maybe leave the students name out until the counselor asks for more information, like if they go to school, or what their name is.

Didn't read the other responses, but torturing and killing animals is a big red flag.

I would absolutely tell the parents, and suggest that some professional help may be in order.

You received many responses already, but I have to give my input as well. Tell the parents. I may only have a 4 year old daughter, but I can't imagine this is normal behavior for a child of any gender or age. Parents may not like hearing it from you, but it's a shot at getting this boy the help he needs before he's not just torturing frogs, but other animals (or worse people) when he's older. Good luck!

Absolutely, I would tell them. If you feel that they are good enough friends that they will take this seriously and not lash out at you or get defensive, by all means, let them know. Even if you don't think they will take it well, tell them anyway. It might in the way you phrase it, as in "I need to tell you something about T, because if it were one of my kids, I would want to know too..." and then let them know what you witnessed. Don't make it about their parenting skills or how they choose to manage their kids or sound like you are accusing them of anything. What they do with that information is up to them but if you start to notice other things, it might be worthwhile putting in an anonymous phone call to Child Protective Services. I find it especially concerning that T was out at night with no parents at home to know what he was up to...if his parents were not home, then who was supposed to be supervising him?

If you think they will get angry with you, then maybe they are not the "good friends" that you think they are...and it's time to put some distance between your family and theirs. T might be a troubled kid and need help, but you also don't need your kids getting mixed up with a bunch like that.

Oh, that makes me so sad.
I would say something, and I wouldn't care if the parents were mad at me for it.
If the child is never disciplined, it could be he's crying out for it.
I've heard of kids pulling wings off bugs and things like that, but killing live frogs for enjoyment?
My son and I were camping a few weeks ago and this dad and little girl (about 4) walked by. The dad said, "Oh...look at the pretty caterpillar". She stooped down to examine it and petted it. It was one of the furry caterpillars. Her dad waited patiently for a few minutes and said let's go. She took her dad's hand and they continued walking. I thought "how cute". Just then, she let go of her dad, turned around and ran back and stepped on the caterpillar and smashed it then ran back to her dad.
I don't know what made her decide to smash it. She'd been so gentle with it just seconds before. Still, that's a far cry from what your neighbor boy is doing.
The parents need to know. It sounds like a possibility they won't do anything about it, but at least they'll know that YOU know what he's been doing.
It's not funny, it's not normal, and if they don't get a grip on him, things will escalate. I'm no expert, but like I said, it could be that he's begging for his parents to pay attention to his behavior.
I'd be wary of that kid around my kids and/or my animals.

Best wishes.

It is not normal! You need to talk to the parents. You can approach it by saying you are concerned with your children seeing the behavior and are worried about the safety of things being thrown into the fire. If the parents don't do something, I would contact authorities. And if a 6 year old is being left unsupervised that should be reported as well.

Yes, tell the parents, and don't leave anything out. Cruelty to animals only escalates to cruelty to humans. You owe it to the animals and humanity. If she does nothing, report it to spca.

I would tell the parents.
This is what is normally considered abhorrent behavior in a child that could be indicative of a deeper problem. Or, it could be that case of a child who has never been taught boundaries and has no discipline - in which the case the parent's will not do anything to him.

And, who exactly, was watching this 6 year old if the parent's were not home? That would be a bigger cause for concern for me if a 6 year old is being left unattended - I think that is, literally, against the law and criminal.

Wow - you have to ask? Yes, tell the parents. The boy is disturbed. He is not "on his way" to being a troubled kid - he's already there.

If you don't want to talk to the parents, call the school and tell them. They are required, by law, to do something about it.

I'd actually call the police or CPS. Such torture and killing of another living creature are the main symptoms of a sociopath... and yes I fully feel children can be as dangerous as adults if they show signs of sociopathic tendancies!

I would most defiantly tell the parents. They might not believe you, or perhaps they already know, and HOPEFULLY trying to get this kid some help.

That is horrible, cruel and heartless behavior. You have a responsibility to tell the parents. If you dont and something else happens, you would feel terrible.

Tell them now! At least then, you can not let your children play with him anymore, and keep him away. Its not a good influence on your own children to even witness that happening. Not a good situation, but you need to tell them asap.

Best wishes, and I truly hope that the parents do something fast about this, instead of pretending like it isnt a problem. If later on they do not do anything about this, and it keeps reoccurring, then you might want to look into something more drastic later on. Such as Cps possibly...

I would definitely tell the parents. Your approach will determine how they react to you but should they take offense you can rest assured you've done your part.

Please tell the parents, it would be hard to hear but they should know.

Yes, tell them. What they do about it is up to them, but this screams disturbed child to me.

I would absolutely tell his parents!!
Though apparently, from what my husband has told me in the past, the boys he used to play with (as well as he) would do things awful like this. In fact, my best friend, a man who is the sweetest most wonderful guy I know next to my husband also used to do things like this. I think it's more typical of boys, but now that we are parents and parents today are with their kids more and see these things in person it seems especially disturbing to us because we see an underlying and unsettling idea in these actions.
Just because the men I know and have in my life have turned out okay after having devious childhoods doesn't mean they all will. It's important for their parents to know what's going on so they can monitor it. I, personally, would not allow either of my children to treat any other living thing this way. (I'm a vegetarian and it kills me how much my kids like meat!) We even have an RIP bush in our yard that we throw any accidentally deceased or found dead bugs that happen upon our yard.
Good luck with the neighbors. Know what you're doing is totally right!!

Tell them right now! They need to know that their son is exhibiting this cruel behavior.

That is just awful. They need to have some serious talks with their child and personally, i would have him evaluated by a psychiatrist. Lack of empathy and cruelty to animals is a very big sign of a brain that has psychopathic tendencies. This child needs to learn that treating an animal with cruelty is totally unacceptable and that animals feel pain. Since it is your neighbors kid I would try talking to the parents, but chances are they may not listen to you and may even seriously dislike you. If it were me I would sit that boy down and talk to him myself about how to correctly treat an animal.

I have to make one additional comment to those of us who are calling this kid names. If we call a kid a "monster" (like I did) or a "serial killer in training," that label will be repeated back to them through your words or by other kids what are always listening to us grownups. When we label a kid "evil" or a monster or stupid, we're actually helping the kid to become what we've labeled him!

We need to remember to label the BEHAVIOR and ACTION as evil or stupid, NOT THE CHILD. It's tough, but I need to keeping reminding myself of this!!!

Sounds exactly like my neighbor kids!

This IS normal behavior...for a kid that grew up with no structure or positive attention!

Obviously, he's dying for attention and your husband yelling at him is giving him the attention he wants (even if it is negative attention).

Don't ever be afraid to discipline any kid that is in your yard (or in a public space if their parents aren't there). All kids need to know that all grown-ups are watching them!

Yelling isn't discipline. That's reaction. Discipline means telling him calmly what you expect from him in precise terms. If he disobeys, then put him in a time out and make him stay there "super nanny style." He's only 6 so you can do this.

When a kid wants to throw something he shouldn't, give him something he CAN throw...at an appropriate target. Then praise his good aim. He wants to throw, so show how to do it positively, and give positive attention. That's what I do with my boys.

His parents obviously don't know how to give this kid structure. Your home can be a haven for him. My own neighbor boys (3 of them [pages 6, 6, and 9] all act the same way as your problem child. But at MY house they've learned how to behave. They're still monsters at their own house. But now both them and their parents respect our family.

It's important to stay friendly with your neighbors. You'd be surprised if you show real care toward their kids by giving them structure. They shouldn't get too mad at you. All parents love their kids. Make sure to ask your neighbors to tell you when YOUR boys misbehave. It's a 2-way street.

Yes. God forbid, but I would REALLY want to know if my son needed help or guidance!

What you have described my dear is a very good sign of ADHD and his parents should be definitely told. I raised two ADHD children and believe me, it is hard, but people like you can help those parents realize they need to start getting some help for that child. Good luck.

OMGosh!!! NOT normal!! Tell the parents!!