Siblings and Temperment

Hi! My first daughter was colicky! Very cranky. There were lots of tears, both hers and mine!
My son is a ball of happiness.
My daughter/first was never very outgoing or easy to smile. I really had to work to get her to smile or laugh. To some degree she is still like that at 5. She is just hesitant and shy.
My son/second has been very outgoing and happy. He smiles and laughs so easily. (it is ironic to write this now, as he is teething and cranky)
My kids are totally oposites, night and day. You can never know what #2 will be like until they are here.
Good luck

yes.. my first was so sensitive.. cried for the first 3 months...only let momma hold her.. we walked the floors with her for weeks and weeks.. so when I was due for my second baby I hired help to come cause I figured i would be a zombie again from the lack of sleep.. number 2 was such a happy content baby.. never cried.. i have so many videos of him laying on his blanket just looking around..

today my first is 4 and high maintenance... very sensitive.. my second is 2 1/2 and is quite difficult as a 2 year old..boy generally a easier going guy/

Hi--
All children are different...period. I think what will help you feel more secure with the upcoming birth of your second is that the second is WAY easier not because they are any better or worse then the first, but because you already know how to be a Mommy. You don't doubt yourself as much, you know how to deal with things and it makes it easier no matter the temperament of the second. And no matter what you will love the second with the same heart-wrenching, joyous, amazing feelings you had for your first. You won't believe your heart's capacity for love.
Congratulations on your newest adventure!
J.

I say every baby is completly different! I don't have children of my own, but in my home, I was the first baby. I was very easy, happy child. Content with life. My next sister was a fussy baby, cried a lot, harder to settle down etc. All of seven of us were very different. Good luck with your next one

sure, plenty of people have spirited children first and amazingly calm children next. plenty of people have it the other way around. the birth order doesn't matter for temperament in babies. i will say this for my second child though, there are certain things i think he would have taken longer to do if it wasn't for his fearless older brother setting the example. like jumping off the furniture.

My first baby had colic, and my next 3 were happy babies. Don't worry! The good news is, as the mother of a high-need first baby, you have so many tricks up your sleeve (and sling) that your next baby will probably feel like a breeze. :)

Hi K. - yes my first was high-strung and was pretty sensitive. My second is laid-back and very independent.

I cant promise though that your second will be any way other than what their temperament is going to be. I hear some trepidation in your request about having to "do that again" and understand your desire for reassurance. At least if you do have another fussy/spirited baby, you will know all the tricks and probably be able to calm him better than you even did with the first.

Of course it is possible. I have 4 children and every baby experience has been a bit different and what worked for one may not have worked the the next one. My first baby was quite difficult but my second was quiet and very content. You just have to wait and see. Also be confident in your parenting and follow cues from baby you will probably find that alot easier to do this time round because you have done it once before which I think makes for a happier baby and mommy. Congrats and good luck.

Yes. Son #1 was challenging, cried alot as a baby, was hard to console. Now, at age 3, he still has huge temper tantrums, yells at us, hits, and won't listen. We work hard every day to stay consistent with him and it's paying off but he's still a challenge. #2 son, 19 months, is happy, easy going, easy to discipline, and just a general "easy" baby. You never know how kids are going to be so don't worry!

Oh Yes! K., I don't know what your pregnancy was like with the first or second, but I think there might be a link with the way you feel while pregnant and your child's emotions. My first son was a big surprise, but for the most part I was happy and thought my adventure was amazing- he is happy and adventurous. While pregnant with me second son I was so unhappy and I cried everyday (husband was in Iraq for the 2nd time). He is very difficult and emotional. Still is sometime and is 4 1/2. With my third son I was very happy, loved my body, loved everyone around me, and did things that made me feel peaceful. My third son who is 3 months old is just that. He is peaceful, never cries and is full of smile. he is just a sweet happy baby.
So don't worry, every baby is different. One may be difficult and the next one is super easy. My advice: sit back, rub your belly, send all those "love" vibes to that little person and just enjoy every moment of your pregnancy. Remember, "God only sends you what he knows you can handle." (Personally, I wish he didn't trust me so much)

K.,
I have two girls (and expecting my third) they are 2 & 4 and their temperment has been different from the day they were born. So there is hope that you will have an easier baby this go around! :-)

Hi K.,
Our first (a girl, now 5) is the sweet, easy-going, easy to train type. Listens well, is obedient, helpful and is easily entertained. #2 our darling son (just turned 4) is nearly the total opposite. I love this little man to my dying end but wow, what a difference between the genders and temperments. He cried a lot as a baby for what seemed to me as no particular reason. Now he has the biggest heart and is kind but strong-willed. Not as quick to be obedient as sister and often pushes buttons I didn't know I had:) He seems pretty determined to do his own thing regardless of the consquences. So, you get the picture. They come in a large variety. Blessings, L.

My 1st was just AWEFUL!!!! but they kept getting better and better after that. I got better at figuring things out, but even at my best, my first still would have been awful. The only time she would stop crying was if I could get her mind distracted with high-contrast pictures, or in the swing (of course the swing did not work when we wanted her to be quiet so we could sleep). The day she FINALLY took a binkie saved me! She did NOT outgrow it until was over a year! Boy, did I learn patience.

As I look back at my four babies, I really think that most of the problems were my breast milk (I know, it's the best thing for them), but my second daughter weened ME at about 4 months, and she was so much happier after that. I know my milk was causing a lot of stomach pain (and my first I nursed till she was almost 18 months. This may not be your solution, but keep an open mind, and you'll figure out your children. After that I weened my other two at between three and four months. They were all much better after they moved to formula (some had to have soy due to food sensititivities or allergies).

I have several friends who had VERY difficult firsts, and the second was much better. I'm sure it works the other way as well. genetics aside, the temperment of one is not a good indicator of the temperment of others.

hi,
Yes, temperament are very different.Also difference sometimes between boy and girl temperament.My first one was very colicky or what they called colicky.With more experiences now and looking back i think she was just hurt with stomach reflux. My second was very quiet and still has a more introverted personality which make it sometime more easy as he is not so needy as my first and my third (18 months currently) who is twice as loud and difficult as my first.But my first and third are also more loud and demonstratif while loving.So it does have advantages too to have more spirited children. Although i agree i do think they are harder to parents.But well we just have to do our best love them all and accept each child personality .My spirited kids do better while constantly on the move,in activity like music class ,swimming lesson ....My son who is more introverted is often overwhelmed by so much going on.So, sometime i do let him stay home with dad (who is more like him) while i take the two other ones out.
N.