Still Crying/emotional After 7 Weeks

Try to find a way to stay home. I have three children, I went back to work when my first was 7 weeks, my second was 3 months, and stayed home after the third. I wish now I would have done everything possible to have stayed home with the first two.

It couldn't hurt to see you doctor just to make sure it isn't even a mild case of postpartum depression. You shouldn't be ashamed or embarased if it is, many women experience this and it can be treated. I had the baby blues after my last baby but nothing to the extremem of what you are going through, and I have always been extremely emotional. Your body and mind have just gone through a lot, do whatever you need to get them both healthy again! For you and your precious babies!

Congratulations on your new baby. Your situation sounds hard but not completely unusual. A difficult hospital experience can make it harder to get off on the right foot. Also, it is definitely more work to have two little ones instead of just one. Glad to hear you are still finding lots of joy though.

A homeopathic remedy that is sometimes helpful for mothers who have had bad hospital experiences, especially if they perceived the experience as a sort of "violence" against them (sometimes that's just how it feels) is Staphysagria.

Staphysagria 30c can be purchased at any good health food store. If it was me, I would take a single dose of 4 pellets dissolved in a glass of water. Then put the bottle away for a month or so. This remedy would continue to work for that long, and so you would not want to take another dose of it during that time.

Best of luck to you on your return to work, and again, Congratulations.

Hi Cathy,

I am sorry to hear that you are having a hard time. BirthChat is a great group. Be sure to check in with your doctor to let them know what you are experiencing and keep an open line of communication with your husband, so that he understands how you are feeling. Another useful tool is to journal our your feelings. Getting them on paper really helps.

Take good care!
R. www.myherblady.com

First, I'd like to say congrats on the new baby! Second, I'm no doctor, but I'm a mother of 12 and it sounds to me like you need to take your B vitamins! I haven't read the other responses, but some people might say that "baby blues" is normal. Maybe it is, and maybe it isn't, but one thing is for sure, and that is that when you are nursing a baby, it's just a continuation of the pregnancy--YOU ARE STILL MAKING THAT BABY! If your body doesn't have enough of the vitamins you need for you AND the baby, it starts to take away your personal supply to give it to the baby and that draws on your nerves (emotions). Maybe you already take your prenatal vitamins, maybe not, but don't let some doctor tell you that you need drugs to feel good. You need vitamins, rest, exercise and a good support system. Good luck, I hope this helps!

I had a really hard time with my first child.....I think i was pretty emotional the first month and a half to two months. What helped me was making sure I had time to myself, even it it was just taking a warm bath while my husband watched the kids. It can be stressful thinking about taking care of two kids as well as going back to work. It is a lot to have on your mind. Just take 20-30 minutes - or more if you can - and do something that relaxes you. Don't think about the things that are stressing you out. Sometimes by doing this, you can even find a solution to issues that have been on your mind.

I don't work, but I do have two kids, and sometimes, even now that my youngest is almost a year old, I get overwhelmed with things on my mind. That's when I revert to my tub! Afterwards, I feel so much better and ready to take on the challenges that I'm currently facing.

Sounds pretty normal to me. Remember, with your first one, you didn't have a toddler to keep up with. You're still pretty close to having given birth, and with keeping up with a toddler, you're not as rested now as you were at 7 weeks with him. I cried a lot after my second was born. It got better when he started sleeping through the night, even when started going longer at night, it helped. Now I cry sometimes even just thinking about the next one being just a matter of weeks away. I don't want to be that tired again! Hope work goes well, and everything settles soon!

Rest at ease knowing your story sounds quite normal actually. I'd call my OB if I were you and talk to him about a progesterone shot or progesterone pill. When I had my first I had a complete breakdown in the hospital the first night there and the nurses told my doc. He explained the science behind the baby blues: that our bodies have a huge drop in progesterone after giving birth, similar to how the progesterone drops at the end of a cycle (which contributes to PMS sometimes) but after birth it is much more dramatic, especially since it's been so elevated for the 9 months of pregnancy. Anyway, he gave me a progesterone shot and that lasted 2 months. At the end of the two months I had one week of mild baby blues and that was it. Before my second baby (new doc because of insurance changes) I asked for one and that doc said we'd see if I needed it. I never really did for that kid. I'm told that is actually quite common to feel more blue with one than with another. It may be that your natural progesterone levels will pick up fine on their own in a couple of weeks. Or maybe you should consider talking to your doc about progesterone since your starting work soon. PS the shots are quite thick and I hear the progesterone pills are nicer. Good luck.

I'm sorry to hear your birth experience wasn't optimal. It sounds like you are still working through it. Going back to work so soon is a difficult situation, regardless of how the baby's birth went, but it can be even harder when we're still recovering, in any sense of the word.

I'd like to invite you to BirthChat. This is a discussion started by The Family Journey to create the support network of yesteryear and a safe place to talk about birth--free from judgement. The next BirthChat is on Monday, April 21st from 6-8pm above Clothes Pony at TreeTop Studio. See our website for more info: www. thefamilyjourney. org. and feel free to contact me through mamasource.

We'd love to meet you and your baby and support you through this trying, amazing time of motherhood.

K.

I am a mom to be, and although I'm not an experienced mom yet, I really feel for you. Is there anyway to explain to your employer that you need more time before going back? I know times are hard right now, and finances are always an issue but remember your well being and your family's is more important than anything. I'm not sure what your profession is, but maybe ask if you can temporarily work from home or with a flexible part-time schedule.

The US maternity system is really backwards. In Europe, moms get 6 months of paid maternity leave! The CDC and WHO both recommend exclusive breastfeeding for the first 6 months, how on earth in the US can we do this with 6-8 weeks maternity leave! It's ridiculous!

Hi Cathy,
Thanks for posting your question. Congratulations to you and your husband on your newest edition. I think the 'old saying' is true that every pregnancy is different and every infant experience is also different. What you are experiencing is completely normal. Feeling the effects of hormones can sometimes take up to a year to balance themselves. It might be a good idea to talk with your doctor about post partum depression to discuss some things you might do to ease this experience. Getting up during the night is also normal. If you are breast feeding, one thing you might want to try is pumping to see how much your baby is actually eating. he might not be getting as much while breast feeding as with a bottle. It might be helpful to avoid comparing your experiences between your two children and honor each individual. the only other thing I would suggest is to feel and express your emotions, if you repress them, they will just resurface at another time. You are a mother of two! you are also working and have to leave your new one to go back to work. This is hard. You are feeling exactly what you need to be feeling, please don't make yourself wrong for thinking you 'shouldn't be' experiencing this. The reality is, you are and it is a wonderful time; a challenging time, but a wonderful time. Honor yourself as well. You are an amazing woman, mother, wife, career woman, etc.

It could very well be post-partum depression. You should be past the "hormonal" ups and downs by now. With all you are going through, it's completely normal to need a little help getting back on track - whether that be time, diet or medication. I highly recommend giving your doctor a call to determine if it is depression and what you can do to help deal with it. Do it for yourself and your family!

You are going through a lot so don't be hard on yourself. Of course, you have many great things in your life and you are grateful for them, but being a mom is not easy. Also, going back to work with a baby is hard, and it's tiring. I had post-partum depression with my first but not with my second. I didn't get any help or talk to my Dr. about it because I felt like I shouldn't be unhappy...I had just what I wanted so why be sad? But your hormones and your brain don't always work in the most logical of ways! Talk to your doctor, rest when you can, take any help that is offered (meals, playdates for your older son, anything) and be nice to yourself. Good luck and know that lots of us have been through this and are thinking of you!

Awww, I feel for you! I was the exact same way. I took 12 weeks off and I remember I started bawling in the car at week 11 because I was thinking about how much I was going to miss my baby when I went back to work. It took me about 15 weeks for my hormones to level out so I didn't cry everytime something went a little off track. "Normal" me is very tough and never cries, so this was hard for me to deal with. I didn't have any depression, just cried a lot!

I created a website at www.totsites.com When I'm at work and missing my baby, I go to the site and look through pictures of him. I also have a picture of him on my desktop. The first week-two weeks I called his daycare at least once a day and I am close enough where I was able to go see him if I really wanted to over lunch, but I held out and didn't go over there. After I saw how much he enjoys daycare and realized how much our entore family benefits from me getting some time away from him to interact with other adults, I was much better. I went back to work Februay 4th and am fine now. Here's my Totsite if you want to see an example: http://www.totsites.com/tot/westonjames The site is free. Best of luck to you! If you ever want to email me for support, my email address is ____@____.com

I'm sure you've heard that every pregnancy is different, so are kids. This one may just want or need a little extra feeding. As frustrating as that is, this may be what is normal for him. Have you considered using a pump and having your husband take one of those night-time feedings? Having a good nights sleep will help you stay in control of the tears.

Do go see your doctor. As someone who has struggled with depression, I can tell you that you will still find moments of joy or happiness, but the fact that you are still crying and get upset easily is a major red flag. So is the fact that this has been happening for 7 weeks.

It may be that all you need is someone to talk to. A good therapist will help you to recognize when you are having a bad moment and how to deal with it more effectively. This will also help you stay in control while at work.

I went through the same thing. If you're breast feeding it's even more likely that you will be hormonal for a longer amount of time. The baby is sucking the life out of you litterally. When you nurse your estrogen levels are at an extreme low and therefore the rest of your hormones will be off balance too. You could try to get on an antidepressant medication,just make sure you tell your doc if you're breast feeding or not. Medications will vary due to breastfeeding. You may also be suffering from Post Partem Depression. Talk to your doctor this is very serious and should not be ignored! Even though you might not see the symptoms yourself doesn't mean you're not depressed.
Just make sure and take time out of each day to have "you" time so you can unwind and come back to your family more relaxed and refreshed. Your family will thank you:) A happy mom is the best mom, for everyone.
Hang in there.