This Situation Here....

You know it's right that you left him.
Quit doubting yourself.
Coming out of an abusive relationship means it'll be a few years before your self esteem comes back.
Talk to a womens shelter about getting some counseling.
No men/boyfriends until you can not fall for the same sort of abusing guy again.
Just concentrate on raising your kids.
Block him and anyone who would tell him about you on Facebook - it's part of leaving him and severing all ties.

You absolutely did the right thing. The family will eventually do what you have done, but for now, they can't make that bold step. You have to protect yourself and your children - of course he is lashing out. You were the only thing in his life he could control, and you took that away. Until he gets himself under control, he will hate and control you. Block him and his family on Facebook. I would not even try to maintain a relationship. And get yourself into a support group.

welcome to mamapedia.

I had a hard time reading your one long sentence - sorry - so I skipped to the end.

Don't worry about his family. If they want to be his punching bag - let them.

You know the truth. You left for the good of you and your children. Don't worry about what he posts on facebook. Those that believe him? Are not your friends.

Get counseling. Not just for you but your children. DO NOT GO BACK. EVER.

Good for you for leaving that bad situation. Sometimes the best thing you can do is to provide your children with a stable life with 1 devoted parent instead of an unstable one with 2. Don't look back. Instead look around to get the resources you need to heal yourself and make you the strong woman your children need you to be.

As far as his family? Stop reading fb because he's being a jerk and they are supporting him in his quest to make you look bad. They'll figure it out or not but you don't have to play a part in the drama he is creating. Don't look to them for support because they haven't walked in your shoes in this relationship. Your choices are yours to make. They don't get to have an opinion that matters.

Hang in there. You got this.

Anyone who says you should have stayed in that relationship is not your friend. They don't get to be your family. They don't care about you and are not good for you to associate with.

When a person doesn't value herself, it's easy to decide that situations like yours are somehow normal or can/should be lived with. Nothing about your relationship was good or healthy.

You can not 'fix' anyone but yourself, so I suggest you look at what parts of you were okay with putting up with that nonsense so that you can prevent future bad choices when it comes to relationships - romantic and otherwise

Hang in there! You did the right thing. Get support, lots of resources out there. You will come out of this and be strong. Surround yourself with supportive people. Cyber hugs!!

Ditto what B said. Couldn't have said it any better. Good luck :)

You did the right thing by leaving. Not only for yourself, but for your daughters. You are setting a good example for them by leaving. You will set a horrible example if you go back. Who cares if his family is happy? They obviously don't care about you and your daughters. Stay off Facebook.

i'm sorry. you tried to do the right thing by staying and keeping your family together, when you knew that didn't work you DID the right thing by leaving.
now your task is to stop defining being 'right' by HIS reactions. he's not a good person. he's not going to give you the validation that you want (and deserve.) you've got to find it in yourself.
you WILL come out of the fog. and leave behind the desire for your actions to have an impact on him. he may never realize the hurt he's caused, the terrible damage he's done to his wife and children, the very people he should most cherish and protect. i'm sorry you have to rebound and heal from that type of trauma.
but you've made the most important first step. you've showed your kids that this sort of behavior is unacceptable. you're on the road to a better life.
good for you, hon. you're a champion.
keep on keepin' on. it will get better.
khairete
S.

NO NO NO, you shouldn't have stayed with him for any reason. You are not the only wife whose husband is a liar and a cheat and a scoundrel. You also aren't the only wife whose husband's family turns against her. It doesn't make it feel any less awful that you aren't the only one, but the point is, that's what people like your husband do. And ANY spouse who does this is showing you that he would NEVER be good to you if you had stayed.

Please go to a lawyer NOW and tell ALL. You need to do this so that you and your children are protected. You need to know the law and what will happen if he is caught with drugs. You also need to get a legal separation from him so that he can't borrow money and YOU owe part of it. That happened to a friend of mine. It took her years to pay off $5000 of HIS debt that he took out right before he left her.

Don't just feel sorry for yourself and do nothing. You just have to get to work on dissolving this marriage and looking forward. If you can't do it for your own sake alone, do it for your children. You CANNOT have a spouse who does any of the things he does, much less all of them. You could be arrested for allowing a man doing drugs in your home with your children there, and social services could take those kids away from you.

I promise you that after you have cut him out of your life, he will end up showing everyone what he really is, and they will shut up about you. Ask your lawyer what to say to people who ask you about what this jerk says about you. That will help you too.

that's a deal breaker. Don't look back, unless you are trying to learn from it. Don't let history repeat itself.

DO NOT go back.
DO NOT worry about what his family says. They aren't walking in your shoes. NO ONE should be a punching bag for anyone (unless you are boxing and your marriage is not boxing!).

Get counseling for you and your children. Learn from this so you don't fall victim again. Be strong. Know that you did the right thing!

You are definitely not wrong to have left. Don't look back. Allow yourself the chance to get a new and happier life. And if you can seriously ignore Facebook. You are simply protecting yourself.

Updated

You are definitely not wrong to have left. Don't look back. Allow yourself the chance to get a new and happier life. And if you can seriously ignore Facebook. You are simply protecting yourself.