What do you do when someone gifts you something that is a wonderful gift, but just not to your taste? For instance, a relative just gave me a Thomas Kincade statue of a woman in a purple dress. There is nothing in my house that is purple and it really doesn't go with anything else that I have in my home. This is nothing that I would have ever picked out for myself. I have it sitting on my nightstand right now. I always find a place to put everything...I just end up with a really cluttered, unorganized look to my home.
I know that the gift was well-intentioned, so I am trying to find a place for it. This relative would be horribly hurt if she heard that I didn't like the gift or gave it away.
Another example is my MIL cross-stiched a picture for us this year. This was also SO much work...she had been working on this picture on and off since January. It is also a Thomas Kincaid design... You are thinking bright colors and beautiful gazebos right? Nope....this thing is brown and yellow and drab. It is also in a plain black frame. I was thinking that perhaps I can change the frame to make this picture more attractive. Obviously, I will find a place for this picture since my MIL worked so hard on it.
What do you do with gifts like this? I KNOW that the gift givers have our best interests at heart here. I am so grateful at the thought put into these gifts...and I am honored that we are thought of for gifts.
Put the gifts away until they come to visit - then pull them out so they see them displayed. Once is really all that's required.
Yep I got a lamp with a dark green lampshade with one peacock feather sticking to the side of the shade.....who would EVER EVER pick this out as a gift...my dear sister....it sits on my nightstand. Gotta love her.
My MIL wants so badly to really WOW us at Christmas. She really means well, but ...
She hardly ever comes to our house. Maybe twice a year. We do our best, but we absolutely return things when we can, regift, give away. We do not want to hurt her feelings! But, what is the point of keeping something that we really have no desire to have or cannot use. Our house is small, and we already have too much stuff.
Personally, I try to never be offended if my gift doesn't hit the mark. I want to find something that the other person will really like, but if my gift isn't it, be my guest. Find something you like.
Not sure my experience applies to your gifts, but I really do understand.
Usually I figure the gift giver wants to get me something I will enjoy. If it clutters up my home or doesn't match then I'm not enjoying it!
I agree, bring it out when they're coming over. Sometimes having them see it gives them the clue that it's not your taste and doesn't match your decor when they see it on your mantle next to your other decor choices.
As for the cross stitch--pull it out of the frame and tuck it into a scrapbook. It will be a lovely memory of your MIL and her hard work that you can share with your future family. You just don't have to share it on your wall!
Egads, they sound horrible!
Do you even like Thomas Kincade Art? If you do, maybe you can exchange the statue for something else. Contact them and see what is available.
And the cross stitch portrait? Oh dear.. I guess reframe it and put it in the guest room behind the door, that way when MIL is a guest she will get to enjoy it.
I like the idea of putting it in a scrap book, and then away somewhere to be enjoyed by future generations.
Sorry--you lost me at Thomas Kinkade.....the painter of light....sigh.
Some of those things go on the walls in the hall. There is no decor or color scheme in the hall, so there is no clash. Sometimes I tell people I hung it in my office.
The problem I have is with clothes. People give me clothes that dont fit and arent my taste. I was taught that when someone gives you clothes the polite thing to do it to wear it at least once when you are around them. That is sometimes hard to do!
Some stuff I out up until I know they are coming over. For instance my sil gave me a huge shiny patent leather bible cover with a giant crystal jeweled cross on it. Kinda showy for me. I put it in the closet until Christmas then I put it out on a side table with a candle and family picture. It actually looked kinda nice. New Yrs its going back in the closet!
I have to agree with those that said to put the gifts out of sight somewhere and take them out only when the gift-giver visits. Personally, I like to give people gifts that I know for sure they'll like; if I don't know then I give them a gift card. I find it annoying when people give gifts that make people feel obligated to use/show them.
This happened to me too. My sister who is financially strapped, purchased us a large glass tea dispenser. The one that sits on a stand for parties. No one drinks tea in our house and we have a refrigerator. I don't know if this thing is only suppose to be for parties, but we don't do that much either. I think I will store mine for a while and IF I have a party I can make LEMONADE!
I'd put the cross stitch pic in a hallway, laundry room or hang it on the garage wall. Eventually I would donate it though, especially if you don't see your MIL that often...
For the other item, take a pic of it and then send it to Goodwill. I let everything like that go, usually immediately. I try not to put something in my house that isn't my style, if it doesn't bring joy or lift my spirits looking at it. I read a really good article about that once so that is my motto not to hold onto something that I can't use or that I don't truly enjoy.
It I find it's not pleasing, why not just let it go to someone who might appreciate it more. Else it will drag you down just looking at it, if you don't like it. Otherwise put it in a closet or drawer if you feel guilty donating it. Eventually you'll be able to let it go and pass it along...
Sounds like you need to start a Thomas Kincade gallery in your home.
I would sell them both on Craigslist or offer to your church bazaar this spring....JK....not really there's a lot of Kincade fans who would love the purple statue. What about your kids? Do you have a daughter who likes purple? Can she have it in her room?
Swap the frame and see if it helps and hang it in the laundry room, or garage, or hallway, or behind a door in the bathroom where it's not in a bright, obvious spot.
my daughter was given a hat, scarf & glove set by a friend we adore who she babysits for. The set is hideous - the colors are not at all something my daughter would like and the style is really trendy-wierd. She would never even consider wearing it. I know where she bought it so I'm thinking of taking it back to exchange and if my friend sees me (she works in the same building) I'll explain that my DD got a new jacket and the colors clash (which is true). I know my friend would rather that my DD use her gift than not.
As for the statue - sounds weird. How often does thi relative come to visit? I would not keep it - but would give it to goodwill or salvation army second hand store. Someone who shops there will LOVE it and it's going to good use. If asked (I doubt your relative will remember she gave it to you a year from now) explain that you know someone who LOVED it and wanted them to have it. (Half truth)
My DD and I do volunteer work and we often get gifts that are just not usable - how many snowman candy dishes can one family use? So we either re-gift them if it's new - or we give them to SallyArm (Salvation Army store in town) where we know lots of people are being blessed by getting to buy a nice gift for not a lot of money.
I think the 'put it out when she comes' is great for the statue....the cross stitch could be put/kept in a special place of it's own as someday it will be a 'treasure' when your MIL has passed, even in a girl's room/hope chest.
Wow. You are a saint for finding a place for all those things. I could never do that...
My Dad has professionally framed old pictures of me and typed up captions to go with them.....awful matte board colors and frames choices, like white metal. Absolutely not going to put that thing out, even if it was re-framed. My house, my decor. His house, his decor. He has also brought back framed pictures and weird art work from various trips abroad. All those things have either been stuffed in the attic or donated to Goodwill.
That being said, I love to hang up my children's artwork. Those items are very dear to me and matter the most. There is always room for those.
Put the gifts you don't love in one spot in your house (closet) and take them out when the givers visit. Like another poster mentioned ... all they need to do is see it once in your house and then they'll forget about it too!
Also - maybe next year brig up the fact that your house is full and ask everyone id they would be interested in doing a gift card swap... to your favorite places??
You have the right perspective. I would tuck the gifts away and bring them out when they visit. Since the cross stitch is from MIL and if she is local, it would be fine in a guest room or a hallway. I would find some wall space a little out of the way. No sense in it frustrating you by seeing it every day. I'm speaking for myself-that would drive me crazy. Maybe the statue would work on a bookshelf. Just feel good that you were thought of (as I know you mentioned) and smile at their quirkiness. You will laugh about the statue with the purple dress one day, especially when she is gone. Kind of like the story the grandmother tells the granddaughter who is angry about her husband's dirty socks on the floor. Grandmother says you'll be sad one day when the socks aren't there, so remember that. That always helps me and defuses the situation. Happy New Year.
