Hi Mamas,
My dear son is 21 months old. He has an absolute love of music and loves singing, all the time. It's really great. However, he gets very excited when he sings and often does it loudly. Not too bad when we are at home, but when we are out and about at the grocery store or in the restaurant. About a month ago I started telling him to use an inside voice when he would get too loud. I would say it very serious and quietly so as to show him how it works. My hubby and I are continuously telling him to use his inside voice and he seems to understand at the moment and quiets down but then he will forget again and get loud again. Is he too young to control his urge to scream at this age? What has worked for you or should I just continue to be consistant and eventually he'll understand? I suggested to my hubby that we might have to take a small break from going out until we can get it under control, or at least be chosey as to where we go.
Thanks in advance!
Thank you for all your response. You all definitely made me feel better about taking him out. Haha, he was singing in the check out line today and two ladies were smiling at him. Even the clerk started singing Old MacDonald! I think my hubby is a little more worried about it than I am, but we will continue to work on telling him to use his inside voice.
I never thought that he could have a hearing issue like some of you mentioned, but he is sensitive to loud noises so I will have to keep that in mind for his doctor's appointment. He did pass his newborn hearing screening.
Thanks again ladies!
My husband and I haven't went out to a nice meal with kids in tow since my son,now 3.5, was 9 mos and started screaming. Little boys are devils when mommy's around. This sounds totally normal. They always forget, just like my husband now has selective memory,too. But, yes, be consistant, and get used to chicken mcnuggets in the emantime!
It is reasonable to expect him to follow your instructions, but not necessarily that he can control it on his own. It is good to set the expectation of behavior right before you go somewhere as well. Learning at this age is a repetitive process. In the next few months, you'll likely notice a shift where he can process and remember instructions the first time you give them...then he'll know the rules and just ignore them...lol.
I might add though, this is a good time to set some sort of limit about how many times you will remind him in a single sitting. At that age I would give my daughter three reminders and then we'd leave the building/situation for a few minutes until she could follow directions. Now I make sure she tells me why we left so I am sure she understands.
Don't stop going out, but be courteous to those around you and be prepared to interrupt/cut your time short if necessary.
my daughter is almost 27months and she is just starting to understand using her inside voice. Just keep at it. Also, I think you should only take him places where he's not going to bother people just till he can control himself a bit better. I hate the stares that we used to get so I only take her places that aren't kid friendly if I have to.
Yes, he's too young to understand this at this age. Just continue to model it for him and remind him and he'll pick it up exactly when he's ready.
I don't think too many people mind a toddler singing loudly in public. Most people think it's cute. I wouldn't take him to the movie theater or anything, but in the grocery store or in a family restaurant....who cares? Let him sing his little heart out! :)
i think you stay on your current course. he will get it eventually. you never know you may have a star on your hands! good luck
We had a similar problem and it turned out our son had hyper sensitive hearing. He was yelling and singing loudly because the noises around him (that we weren't even hearing) we causing him pain. By being loud himself he was avoiding the pain. You might want to get his hearing check, first by a regular audiologist and then maybe by a speech pathologist. Our speech -pathologist is Berard trained and did a much more sensitive hearing eval. then the audioilogist, and found the problem it made a big difference in our lives. FYI-- My son also had bad reactions to other noise, like bathroom fans. Really hated fire sirens, and stuff like that. This may not be your son. This can be normal behavior at this age.
At 21 months old, the part of the brain that governs impulse control is still developing. So yes, he is still too young to completely control his urge to scream. It is good that you are working with him to try to teach him, and he will eventually get it. Its really great that he will bring his volume down when you tell him to, but perfectly normal that he gets exited and gets loud again :) I read The Happiest Toddler On The Block, and it really helped me understand the toddler brain, and what they are capable of at this age. I say keep going out in public! Who cares if he is singing, I would think it was really cute if I saw that out in a store. A restaurant or movie theater might not be appropiate, but don't stay home beacause you are worried what other people might think. The truth is that kids this age scream, shout and all that other fun stuff. You sound like you are doing a great job. Don't worry, your son sounds perfectly normal and he will get it eventually.
I think he is just enthusiastic and it is hard to contain your enthusiasm for long. It is great that he changes his behavior when asked. Maybe try, No signing at restaurants. That has worked for us. Then you dont make a scene. Or, if you want to sing that loud, please do so in the play room or outside, but not in the living room or at the diner table. I think it will just take continous reinforcement, like everything else, Good luck
This is very normal. Continue to tell him to use his inside voice.You may have to touch him and put your hand to his arm and then make a shhh, sound.
We had a little neighbor who was the same way.. She was just naturally loud. Her parents would just say her name to get her attention and then tell her "to bring it down".. they would touch their lips.. eventually she knew this was the signal.
Make sure to get video of this.. It sound precious!
It takes these little ones a while to get that sort of thing. They are just so excited and really it is part of their personality. I would just be a bit choosy about where you go and would never worry in the grocery store. At least your child is just being loud, usually there are those kids that scream through the whol store. = )
Don't worry, he will get it eventually, just keep in mind that he will probably always be a bit louder than others, it is just who he is (I know because I have three kids, one is very quiet (10), one is just plain loud (4) and one is a loud singer all the time but quiet other than that(2)). = )
It is typcial for a 21 month old to lack impusle control at this age.
I would suggest that you have his hearing checked, he may not know how loud he is, and it could not hurt to know for sure.
M.
