When Does the Crying End?

Well my son is two and was doing so good with napping and all the sudden he went bonkers and has been crying a lot before naps, I think he is getting some molars. I know the crying things is just so tough because you know they need sleep. I honestly think it just comes and goes in spurts. Everything will be rocking along great and then something in their life changes and they have a rough patch. We just keep on trying different things are just follow what we feel to do in the moment most of the time. His early rising will probably pass, I know it doesn't seem like it now, but he will probably just get through whatever is troubling him. Does he nurse, maybe nursing him and letting him get back to sleep would help. I used to nurse my son often during the day to ensure good sleep. I know when they go through growth spurts sleep can really be affected because they get hungry. So you could try upping his milk/formula intake and maybe his food intake. Does he use a pacifier, maybe popping one in his mouth at that time would help soothe him back to sleep. My son never took a paci, just didn't like them at all, but one time when he was just really having some trouble we would put a paci in his mouth and he would suck it and drop off to sleep. I mean we would literally have to stand over his crib holding the thing in there! It was only like a week or so, and you know we were desperate for him to sleep!;) We did CIO and still do, sometimes we go in, sometimes we rock, sometimes we don't, honestly we just go with our heart most of the time. The only thing I never do is bring him in my bed because that is my only space and time with my husband. Like you we keep a routine and do everything we can to make sleep a positive experience. I wish you all the best and just hang in there, it will get better!!

Hi K.,

I am not an advocate of leting them cry. They cry for a reason. He is only 10months old. Just go and pick him up. Co-sleep with him and he will sleep better. He spent 9 months in you and he is probably missing you. They need you to be there for them. You cannot give them to many cuddles or hugs. DOn't let the poor little guy cry. It is probably breaking his heart.

W.
Mother to 2 little boys.

Crying before naps? Well, that depends on the child not the technique used to get them to sleep.

I hate to tell you this but I have a 3 year old that cries when she has to nap. Every time.

I used Teething Tablets (I think I got them at Whole Foods--they are a holistic, natural rememdy for teething) and had quite a bit of success with them. My middle daughter really suffered with teething and would cry and cry until I gave her a teething tablet or two, then she would fall asleep within about 5-10 mins. I never let any of my girls (I have 3) cry for an hour at naptime or bedtime. I would go in and soothe them if they had been crying for more than 5 or 10 minutes. You don't have to pick him up, just pat him and whisper to him softly the same thing over and over (i.e., "Shhh...it's time for night-night"). Just keep doing this every 5-10 mins. He needs reassurance that you are still there. You can try this for the early morning wakings, too. This worked very well for my youngest daughter and didn't take any longer than CIO (which I did with my middle daughter and swore I'd never do again). Also, I always had a nice, relaxing bedtime routine (bath (at night--not for naps), story, rocking, soft music, etc.) and would rock them until they were just about asleep. They are now 12, 10 and 5 and I haven't rocked anyone for quite some time now, so I don't think it creates bad habits or anything. Some children are more temperamental and sensitive than others and we, as parents, have to adjust our expectations and act accordingly. Good luck!

Sounds like your child might be going through a growth spurt or just learned something new. When my son goes threw one or the other sleep changes. Be patient.

I do not let me son cry for an hour without going to comfort. Even at 16 month I go in if he is still crying after 5 minutes. He works himself up so much he can't calm down. I go in and calm him down and then once he is calm I lay him back down. Reassure your son but keep putting him down until he takes a nap.

If your son is crying to the point it gets to you put him in his bed and get in the shower. The shower will cover the sound and help you calm down...I did this a few times when I just didn't know what to do. Once I was calm I found it much easier to deal with my son.

Keep up the great mothering!

As you may know, as babies grow older, they start to realize that they are separate people from their mother. Also, you nursed your son for a while and then stopped, correct?

My experience is a little different than yours as we did child-lead weaning where he decided which feedings to drop. I did work and pumped for at least 2 years. Toward the end of his nursing life, he only nursed before bedtime and if he was sick and not feeling well. Nursing does amazing things to calm a frantic child (from teething, a boo boo, over-tired, etc). If that is something you want to try again, you should be able to re-start your milk supply by using a hospital grade pump every couple of hours; check with a local Le Leche League leader for more info or online.

Teething was another time that we needed extra attention. It seems that your baby is definitely the age to be teething and needs some extra cuddling and soothing to help him calm down. I had a niece that would cry herself to vomiting almost nightly- she needed the reassurance that she wasn't being abandoned for some reason.

I did see on the Super Nanny show several years ago how she helped a mother put the child down for the night and naps by slowly increasing the amount of time mom responded to the crying. For instance, mom put the child down, and walked out of the room. She watched the time, and went back in after a few minutes if the child was crying. She did not pick up the child but basically soothed the child (somewhat) by kissing the top of her head and telling her she loved her and sweet dreams. Then she walked out of the room. Again watched the time, and waited just a bit longer before going in. The lights never came on, child was not picked up, but the mother reassured the child that she was ok by touching in a loving way, kissing top of head, and quietly telling the child it was time to sleep (in whatever way one does that, i.e. "time for nigh, nights" or "it's sleepy time").

As you can probably tell, I don't agree completely with the CIO method. I couldn't handle it, and found the nursing combined with some co-sleeping, and the Super Nanny method much better for all of us. I was almost more on the Attachment Parent method than anything else. I read Dr. Sears books as well as some others and worked with those methods. I also asked a lot of questions just as you are doing.

Find the best way for your family to accomplish going to bed. You shouldn't be stressed out, neither should your child or husband on a constant basis. Each child is different and needs different amounts of reassurance at different times. Enjoy this time while your little one is tiny and wants to be with you. In a year, 2 years and so on, he will change and won't need you so much. This year my 7 year old was too cool to let me kiss him as I left him at Summer Day Camp! (of course I grabbed him and "got him" anyway!) Children are a Gift from God. Each of their ages is special, so enjoy them. Best Wishes, M.

I understand completely. My little one was like that for a little while. Do you notice when you hold him if he has alot of gas, or does he spit up frequently? Mine was having gas pains and spitting up , from an upset stomach. Try using gas relief drops when he starts to get fussy and I bet he will stop crying and go to sleep. Now everytime he cries alot and nothing seems to work I give him that and he falls right to sleep. the way I found out was one day he would just not stop crying and when I picked him up he was passing gas and grunting while crying. So its worth a shot.
Good luck and God Bless.
K.