Why Are Some Moms So Judgmental on This Site?

If you ask thousands of people a question, you are going to get thousands of answers. Some you might like, many you will not. No one is going to walk in your shoes for you. If you want someone to pat you on the back, call a girlfriend. If you want random strangers to give you advice and pass judgment on what is going on, post it on the internet.

Yes, there are a lot of judgy mom's on this site, just like in real life. Imagine if you stood up at the next football game and read your story that you posted to everyone in the stadium - should they all sit quietly and do a group hug? Why? Just because you all are at the same football game? Just like here - just because we are all mom's we should all agree with your choices or treat you with kid gloves when we don't?

Grow some thicker skin. Take the advice you find useful from this site and disregard what isn't helpful. That's kind of what being an adult is all about.

Good luck.

B.,

I'm sorry - you come to a public forum and want advice. You got it.

You didn't get sympathy because YOU opened this can of worms. YOU are the one who slept with a man you didn't know and got pregnant. YOU are the one who stalked the man and his family for TWO YEARS trying to get him involved...NOW he's involved and you don't like it?? TOO BAD!!!

Get on birth control.
STOP sleeping with men you don't have a LONG TERM (Like 2 years) relationship with.
Get job.
Get an education.

Accept YOUR responsibility in this situation!! You did this. YOU ARE responsible for this. Once you accept and acknowledge that? Your life will improve. And you will be on the road to a happy, healthy life.

Good luck!

A judgement is a decision, an opinion, a consideration. Every answer to every question here is a judgement, unless someone directly quotes a mathematical or scientific fact, or cites a law. Advice is judgement. Someone asks a question, such as "should I hold my child back a year in school" and then perhaps provides some relevant details, and then people with experience with holding a child back, or not holding a child back, or who are educators, give their opinions, judgement, insight, and how they handled a similar situation. Judgement does not always equal scorn. When a judge in a court room says he will render his judgement, he's not saying "I'm going to tell this scum how stupid he is". He means "I'm going to now tell everyone my decision about how this case will be resolved." There is such a thing as sound judgement.

If you ask a question online, you are opening the door to a multitude of opinions, of judgement. There may be a cruel answer, a disparaging one, a disrespectful one. There may be a thoughtful, insightful answer.

You can't dictate the responses you'll get from posting a question online. You asked a question of the internet world, and received a variety of opinions. You're free to carefully consider all of them, discard some, disregard some, ignore some, take some to heart. But if you only ask a question with the expectation of receiving happy words, a pat on the back, a virtual high-five, only positive fluff, you'll never get good advice from anyone or anywhere.