3 Years Old and He's Still Not..........

my daughter does that at 6=) the first one. i know several other kids like it too. now she only takes about 2 songs to fall asleep. I put on the beatles and stand beside her (now thats shes in a loft bed, prior to that i would lay next to her) and she;s out before the second song is over. I also put the song on repeat so she hears it all night if she wakes. it's been working wonders.

have you tried adjusting his bedtime so he';s more tired, pissibly earlier if he;s overtired or later

Have you tried reading for awhile, leaving the light on, leaving the the door open so he can hear you watching t.v. or music in his room? Some kids are just scared!

Our first one had a similar problem. A very nice grandmotherly type woman told us to hire a babysitter and go out on a date for the next week and let our son fall asleep on his own. He will cry and have a fit at first, but will gradually go to sleep on his own.

So, we told the babysitter when to put him down and not to pick him up. We went out and saw a movie and had dinner or went for a walk or watched the stars or visited friends, or etc. In a week he was going to sleep on his own and still cried, but then it was only for 10 to 15 minutes, not for the hours it took him before.

Good luck to you and yours

As for falling asleep on his own, you're close. It's a developmental
stage.
I made sure my son was good & tired having had a ton of activity during the day.
If he's tossing & turning for that long, he either isn't tired enough yet to go to bed or didn't get enough exercise/activity during the day.

I made sure I ran his but off during the day doing diff things (not sure if
you work outside the home or not. Since I'm a SAHM, this part is easier
for me.).

Put a night light in his room.

I started slowly saying, "Okay I have to go to the bathroom, I'll be back soon."

or

"Mommy is going to bed too so I'm going to tuck you in, give you kisses and go to bed, too.".

Make sure his bedtime isn't too early.

Since I'm a SAHM, I can adjust his bedtime if he's had a nap. If he's napped, he gets a later bedtime.

Also, maybe some slight white noise might help him like a small fan on low not pointing at him.

Watch him for signs of tiredness. I can tell in my child's face & eyes when he's truly tired or just not ready for bed yet. I've had to roll with a few growing spurts & stages.

It gets easier. You're almost there. Hang in there & try what I've mentioned above.

Okay, the potty training is completely normal. Let it go - he'll figure it out. If you're working on it, stop. Sounds like the bedtime routine is a lot more of a problem.

Is this sleep pattern a new issue? Have you changed the evening routine? Usually it's advised that parents have the same routine with calming activities (for some kids, it's a bath, teeth and a story, for some kids it's not the bath because they have too much fun with all the toys. For others, calming music on the CD player works.) But he needs to learn to calm himself down without you sitting there until he falls asleep. If he learns that pitching a fit gets him what he wants, he'll start that in other areas.

For my son, we brushed teeth and sat snuggling while we read a book. He liked things in rhyme (Dr. Seuss is one example). He could pick one long book (e.g. Dr. Seuss) or 2 short ones. We sat in the rocking chair for this. He also chose who was going to put him to bed, assuming we were both available. He kissed the other parent goodnight, and then the 2nd parent and he went into his room. After he got in bed, we turned the lights off (night light on), and he decided which stuffed animal was going to sleep with him that night. I used to sing "Good night David" to the tune of "Good night ladies" and I made up verses like "Sweet Dreams, David" and "We had a good day" and put in the fun things we did together or that he did in nursery school. I just crammed the extra syllables into the verse if I had to, keeping it fairly short overall. Maybe 5 or 6 verses. I sang softly and soothingly, and ended with "Time for sleep now". My husband and I both would stroke his hair or do something else relaxing (back rub, for example). I sang more slowly as we got to the end. Then I got up to leave.

I didn't stay no matter what. Just a quiet reminder "time for sleep now" and out the door.

He sometimes fussed more at nap times, and we just put a doorknob cover on (the childproof kind) so he couldn't get out. Eventually he got tired and went to bed.

I'd pick a few days when maybe you don't have to get up early (such as the long weekend coming up) and just sleep train him like people do with infants. If he fights you, don't give in. He needs his sleep, so making him get it is the best thing you can do.

ETA - I just saw the comment about giving him melatonin. Yikes! There are very few safe supplements out there (and I'm in the business, so I know) - and there was just a report on the news last night about being very careful about where you get your supplements because most are not regulated and have little quality control. Unless you know exactly where it's manufactured and under what conditions, don't go that route! Your child's issue is behavioral and doesn't require treatment. Just because something is "natural" doesn't mean it's safe - think snake venom, toadstools, poison ivy, arsenic!

My son is 3 years and 1 month old and has never pooped on the potty. He doesn't care to! He's still in a diaper even though he can stay dry for hours on end. He just doesn't want to. So I'm not rushing him!

My daughter had a hard time falling asleep or learning to fall back asleep (still does at age 5). Some kids are like that. Set a time - say 10 minutes to sit with him. Then tell him that you are going and will check on him. Come back in a few mins and kiss him and say the same thing. If he says he can't fall asleep - tell him i'ts okay to lay there. If he throws a fit or gets out of his bed/room, put up a gate or shut the door. Give him the option "Do you want the door open? You must stay in your room." My daughter (when I first did this) slept in the doorframe IN her room...as long as she didn't come out, i didn't care!

Use that time to love up your boy and cuddle. Give a little back rub and sing some songs. My little one loves this and I have done it with each child. It makes them feel special and they sleep so soundly when you give that little extra love and attention at the end of the night. He will grow out of it but for now, give him that extra reassurance.

What is the big deal about staying with him while he falls asleep? Why don't you lay with him and cuddle with him so he feels loved and happy as he falls asleep. He probably senses your annoyance. Also, lots of 3 year old have trouble pooping in the potty.

I would give him some melatonin, it's a safe and natural supplement that helps calm down for sleepiness. Also, don't sit there for so long, he will eventually learn how to self soothe. Do the whole bedtime routine, give him lots of cuddles, rad a book, turn of the light and turn on the nightlight, turn on some white noise like a fan and walk out of the room. He will fight for a few days, but will get used to it. Dr Sears is an expert in childhood issues and he has some great advice for this:
http://www.askdrsears.com/?q=topics/parenting/sleep-problems

Looks like he is not sleepy or tired enough. Is he at daycare or at home all day? My son is at home with M. and I make sure I take him out and let him run around. They really need some activity, no matter how much my son plays at home it doesn't get him tired. Also, have a bedtime routine. So that your son knows that after reading the story book it's time to sleep. He will do better if he knows what's coming next.
My son has trouble winding down and falling asleep as well. I put him in his bed and tell him "mom will be back in 2 minutes, go to sleep" , give him a kiss and walk out. Initially he would throw a tantrum , get down from bed etc and I would go back after few minutes and put him back in bed and repeat the same words. I don't stay too long , I tuck him in and leave. Try this , you might have to go in few times initially but very soon that will change. Once your son knows moms around , she will come if I need her , he will sleep on his own. At 3 he understands a lot .He might be stubborn now but don't give in. Just make sure he is safe in his room even if he wanders.
Potty ... no idea. My son still in diapers :(

On sleeping... Make sure he is tired. Have you looked at his nap schedule? May be time to cut his nap down, move it earlier, or just skip it altogether. Make sure he is getting enough physical exercise --- I make sure to do something physical with my 3yo after dinner each day to wear him out. We do lawn races, hop around inside, balloon "fetch", etc. Anything to get some energy out of him. Then we do a bath to calm him, and read books, then I lay with him til he falls asleep. Usually it only takes him 5 or 10 min and he's out. He wakes up at 6:30 a.m., naps from 12:30-2 at school, and then we go up for bed at 8:30/9, aiming for him to be asleep by 9:30/10, if that helps at all. A consistent routine definitely helped him. Good luck!

What's his bedtime routine? I would make it a very predictable bath, books, bed and start winding down at least an hour ahead of his bedtime. Wake him at about the same time, even on weekends. Tell him he can play or read quietly IN BED but he cannot pitch a fit about it. Treat that like the tantrum it is. You can try sitting in his room but not by his bed and not interacting with him. When he gets up, just put him back. Don't talk. Don't cajole. If he gets no reaction out of you, then playtime is over.

Sorry, don't know about poop. DD was poop trained faster than pee.

For the potty part, it will happen, don't push it or it will probably be worse.

For the sleep, my son (who recently turned 4) was never a great sleeper. When he switched out of his crib right when he turned 2 (coming back from a trip out of town forced it), he made one of us sit there with him, and it was horrible. He would be awake forever. We slowly moved out of his room, so for a few days we were 2 feet away from his bed, then another few days 5 feet away, then in the doorway, then outside where he couldn't see us, then in the living room so we could tell him to go back to bed when he got out. That was horrible as well, but he finally got used to it, which is what you need. At 3, and now, my son can play hard all day, and still be going strong at night. If he is truly tired, he will go to bed when we put him down, otherwise he will stay up and play. The rules are that he has to be quiet (helps keep down the craziness) and stay in his room. Anyway, he will stay awake for 1 to 1 and a half hours, depending on how tired he is. I normally put him down at 9 (otherwise it will be even more hours of this, I've tried), and he still gets his needed 10 hours of sleep almost every night. You could try giving your son a book to read, or something to play with while he lays in bed, and know that he may just need to unwind for a while before he sleeps, as my son does. If I were you, I would get out of his room though, then you can at least do your own thing while he is doing that.

I didn't potty train my daughter until I went to the doctor and was told she really shouldn't be in a diaper anymore. She was well past three (I was just lazy and didn't want to do it) then trained quickly. I wouldn't sweat it.

As for the falling asleep, we had the same problem with my daughter. What we did was tell her that we'd stay in the room with her but wouldn't interact at all. No talking, no looking, no cuddling. One of us would just basically sit on the floor for a set amount of time. After a few days, we would do the same except move a few feet closer to the door, and so on until we would stay at her doorway, then in the hall, where she could still see us. Eventually, we'd be in the hall where she couldn't see us, of course, then we'd just leave. It took some time and it was hard to sit there like a statue and not interact at all, but this trick worked for us.

Good luck to you, Bumblebee! :)

L.

With you sitting there he's never learned to self-soothe himself to sleep. You say he'll pitch a fit and keep you up later, so he's getting his way. How's that working? Not so well, I'm guessing, since it's killing you :( Work on helping him learn self-soothing techniques by having a bedtime routine of bath, rubdown with night time lotion, a story or two and lights out, good night. No TV or anything electronic after dinner, and dim the lights when you begin. Keep the house quiet and talk in whispers only. A fan for white noise may also help. Make sure he has a lovey to hug, and don't worry if he tosses and turns, the rule is he stays in bed quietly, as you will not go in. Stand firm and consistent. Take control of the situation away from him, and don't be discouraged, it may take awhile.

Pooping in the potty help, the info on this site worked for us last year when my guy was 26 months:
http://www.rogerknapp.com/medical/pottytrainingrefusals.htm

Hang in there!

i have a three year old and he too still cannot fall asleep on his own. i think he has night terrors. once he is sleeping, we leave his room and he stays there till about 1am which then he comes to our room. its fine with me... i wont battle with sleep!
he sleeps about an hour during the day while he is at daycare but... on the weekends we have started skipping the afternoon nap because he falls asleep faster on and stays in his bed longer. of course at a daycare facility you cant really tell the provider to skip nap times since they are state licensed. oh.. not sure if you have thought about this but we also give our son 3mg of melatonin at night. it just helps promote sleep, doesnt keep them sleeping... just relaxes them. works for us! good luck!

my son was well past 3 when we finished potty training. that is developmental and not a big deal.

the sleeping habit, well that's habit and behavioral. it is up to you to change it or deal with it. i would never have the time or energy to take on an hour an a half bedtime routine (or more if you're doing baths, songs, prayers, etc), i work full time. if you decide to change the habit, then supernanny can help you - helped me after a bad illness where my son was sleeping in my bed night after night.

Don't push the potty thing, if you do, you can screw things up.

Try melatonnin for the sleeping thing, with lots of fresh air and exercise during the day and then put him to bed a little later, maybe 1/2 an hour later.Melatonin and then warm milk with a little molassess.

Good luck!

Sounds common for some kids. I have read on mampedia that some kids dont get fully potty trained until they are 4 years old. You obviously have spoiled him, thats why he wont fall asleep on his own. We all spoinl our kids so thats not neccessarily a bad thing. Just be more firmer on certain things. Potty training can be a process. But I personally feel that if your child can talk and has good sense, then he can go to the potty. Just pooping in pants because he want to. If he have some kind of disorder then just be patient. I had a hard time traing one of my kids. She had turned 3, could hold a full convesation but still wasnt going to the potty. She would actually bring me the pullups and baby wipes and climb up on the changing table!I took my moms advice and popped her everytime she used it on herself. Within a few days she was potty trained.