My little boy has recently started exhibiting a couple of behaviors that I am concerned about. He has had a few accidents lately, where he has peed his pants. It's happened a few times at home, over weekends, and I had attributed it to him being more interested in playing without stopping, and doesn't make it to the bathroom in time. But he has had some wet spots towards the end of the school year when I picked him up from aftercare, and just today, he had an accident at day camp. Prior to this recent issue, he went through a few bouts of wetting the bed during the last week of school for the last couple of years (last week at preschool, then last week of pre-k and kinder). I had chalked it up to being nervous about knowing something big was going to change for him.
The other issue is that over the last few months, he has picked up this habit of chewing on the neckline of his t shirts. He also does it to his sheets and blankets sometimes, but it's really noticeable to others when he has stretched out his shirt collars and they are all wet. I recently purchased one of those stretchy chewable necklaces for him to wear so he will stop ruining all of his shirts. It seems to work for the shirts.
I am guessing he is either feeling really anxious about something (or multiple things), or is just developing some ticks. I have tried having gentle discussions with him around it, to get to what could be causing it, and he just says he doesn't know why he does it. I feel really bad for him because I don't want him to get teased by classmates for wetting his pants, and its a matter of time before someone is going to start giving him a hard time about the chewing on things.
Does anyone out there have experience with either of these two issues? Any advice or solutions that worked for you?
As a teacher of 6 year olds I can say... There are still accidents and some kids do chew on their clothes. I personally think the chewing isn't that big of a deal. How many adults do you know that chew on the end of pens or put their hands in their hair when thinking? I see those as being the same, but that is only my opinion. Good luck!
Just tell him to not chew on his shirt when you see it to remind him. It's not uncommon for boys his age and even a bit older to chew, stretch, etc. shirts. Why? I don't know. Just tell him to stop when you see him in a jovial way so he remembers. As for the other issue I would ask your doctor about it.
My son was completely trained by age 2, but began to regress to the point where he never used the bathroom on time and his clothing were constantly soiled. This went on until the age of 9 [can you believe it?]. I consulted all types of doctors and was told a few times it was a psychological problem. [Once, he even took his feces and wiped them all over the headboard of his bed.] Finally, in desperation, I took him to a child psychologist, who told me the name of the behavior and put him in the hospital and re-trained him like you would a toddler. He also had some talking sessions with him. FINALLY, it stopped. [Note: He was an olny child and my husband and I were having a turbulent marriage at the time.] Bottom line: Don't take it lightly and don't be afraid to exhaust ALL resources.
chewing on shirts is common-my son did it and so did my brother. I would call the doctor about the wetting problem though.
Experience with both. Our nine-year-old has accidents every six months or so. Gets busy and doesn't want to waste time going to the bathroom. Don't worry about him getting teased by classmates. Peer pressure here can be a good thing. :) No tips for you, really, just wanted you to know boys seem to have a rough time mastering the potty.
Our son also chews his shirts. It's at the point now where I've threatened that he'll have to use his own money to replace the damaged shirts. I'm fed up! It ruins the collars. Our son has diagnosed anxiety, so in our case, I'm pretty sure it's tied to that. I like your necklace idea!
My oldest son chewed on his shirt collars a few times and I just told him to stop, that it ruined his shirts! I also told him that his Auntie (my sister) used to do that when she was his age too. So as you can see it is NOT something that is un-common or something to be worried about.
As far as the accidents are concerned, I have no *'real' experience with that...so I can not help much but I do think you would be wise to address the issue as soon as it happens, every time....not to make him feel bad, just to remind him that he is getting big and that he needs to make it to the bathroom. Maybe a subtle reminder to get to the bathroom on time and an even subtler remark about how he doesn't want to get teased for being the boy who wets his pants at school?
*Both my stepsons wet their pants for a VERY long time (but only at their Mothers house and at school? When they were here with husband and I they had no problems but I did remind them to go to the bathroom and made sure they went to the bathroom every night before they went to bed) and their mother did everything under the sun, including ignoring it in the beginning and telling them 'it was OK' and medication and taking them to the chiropractor and nothing helped....they just stopped when they were ready? I do feel that the initial action of telling the boys that it was OK was a HUGE mistake, it gave them time to make it a habit and we all know that habits are HARD to break!
Per the pee leaks or wetness or accidents:
He is only 6 years old.
Per my ALL of my daughter's Teachers, from Preschool to Kindergarten to 1st Grade... they ALL unanimously said, that kids these ages have accidents. It is not unusual. Thus, in these grades, the Teachers request that the child has extra clothing in their cubby. And at my kids' school, even the Health room, has clean extra clothing/undies/shorts/t-shirts for the kids if they have accidents.
If a child has an accident or is wet, the Teacher does NOT make a big deal of it. This happens. They are young and not rocket scientists about it. Even my daughter, in Kindergarten and 1st grade, had some accidents.
My son, who just completed Kindergarten... some of his classmates had accidents at school or was wet. The Teacher never made it a big deal.
And the kids don't tease about it... because it is something that happens and the Teacher teaches them, that they are ALL children.
Now, as for night time... night time dryness is not something that occurs until even 7 years old, sometimes later. And kids these ages still wear night time diapers. It is normal and not unusual. It is about the physiological maturing and development of the organs. And it is NOT the same thing, as daytime pottying. Night time dryness, is a completely DIFFERENT timeline and development.
Just use a water proof bed pad under him, and so the sheets do not get soiled. Me: I have like 4 of them that I use under my son (who is 5) and I rotate them. The sheets do not get soiled. I got the waterproof bed pads from Amazon. They have many.
ALL KIDS... have daytime and night time accidents.
It is childhood.
It is normal.
And many young kids, do things like chew on their shirt, or twiddle their hair, or chew on their nails. It is a comforting thing, and can be when they are stressed or even just bored.
They grow out of it.
When he is about 2nd or 3rd grade... kids those ages change. And you will not see the frequency of these "young" child things.
There is something called "Potty Scotty" underwear. It is a padded underwear. Typically used for potty training. However, my son who is 5... wears these. He can still fit their XXL size, which is for up to 49 pounds. My son is a bit more than 49 pounds, but he is lanky and can still fit his Potty Scotty underwear. Anyway, the reason still he wears it is because he still fits it, and it is padded... so even if he has a bit of pee wetness, the underwear contains it, and it will not drip down his leg. My son actually likes these underwear, because again, if he leaks or has a slight pee wetness, it will not drip down his leg. The underwear absorbs it well and it is not embarrassing.
Here is the link for it:
http://www.pottyscotty.com/Kit-0018.html
http://www.pottyscotty.com/CTGY/Potty-Training-Pants.html
Our son did both of those things in Kindergarten...and I think the chewing lasted through 1st grade. I am guessing it is normal odd kid behavior. For our son with the accidents it was because he did not want to stop what he was doing to take the time to walk to the bathroom. We had a conversation about it one day and he told me he just did not want to stop playing to go ask a teacher and then walk over to the bathroom. Once we realized he was in full control of this we had a serious conversation about how this was unacceptable and that there would be consequences when he got home (taking away screen time). We also had his teacher remind him a couple times during the day to go use the restroom. This worked really well. Once he realized he was going to get in trouble he stopped. The chewing of his shirts was really annoying, but I took it to mean he was getting in his 6 year molars. And indeed he was! Either that or he saw a friend do it and thought it was cool. We just kept calmly reminding him to stop and if he chewed a hole through a shirt he would get in trouble. He is 8 now and has not done that for a long time.
