Being the End of Everybodies Frustrations Lately!

relationships are a two way street...it's not her job or place to call you all the time - it's great that you picked up the phone and called her..

the problem with FB, Myspace or even here is that you cannot HEAR the voice or the inflection so what YOU interpret as snappy - might not have been...

Yes, people need to think before they talk - that's true...however, sometimes when we are comfortable with someone - we don't think before we talk.

If she is rude to you again, then I would talk to her about it...if not - let it go...why hold on to anger? Especially if someone has said they are in the dumps lately....

Here, post this on FB - it is where I got it...cracked me up :)

BREAKING NEWS: The Pity Train has derailed at the intersection of Suck It Up & Move On, and crashed into We All Have Problems, before coming to a complete stop at Get the Hell Over It. Any complaints about how we operate can be forwarded to 1 (800) waa-waaa. This is Dr. Sniffle reporting LIVE from Quitchur Bitchin'. If you like this, re-post it. If you don't..suck it up cupcake, Life doesn't revolve around YOU.

If nothing positive will come from saying something then don't. But if something positive will come from it - by all means say something. Good luck!

I hope your day gets better!

I'd ignore for now but the next time it happens, excuse yourself politely. Just say something like, "I'll let you go now, we'll talk later when you're feeling better, bye."

I could launch into a full out dissertation about the nature of in-laws and how the relationship is strained from the onset because you neither have the familiarity of a family bond forged over your formative years, nor did you actually choose each other.... if it were a friend or a spouse or your own sister or mother, I would say the relationship demands a little honesty. "You've hurt my feelings and as much as I would like to be there for you when you're feeling down, you can't take that as a license to treat me like dirt." However, with in-laws.... it's unlikely the relationship can take such a demand for honesty. I would ignore it and just not open myself up to be their doormat in the future. If your MIL is having issues, let someone else handle it. Any further such incidents from your SIL and I would unfriend her.

I don't think you need to ignore it OR say anything to them. Take it to God. Read what HE has to say. It's amazing how when we go to church or watch a message we so often sit there thinking that so and so needs to hear this. We all do that. But if we listen to the messages and take it to heart for ourselves, we can let God deal with the others. Take the frustration you feel and turn it into a motivation to study and improve and just know that the Lord says that it's good to overlook an offense.

Let it slide, everyone has bad moments that can last for months on end. The weather I know this seems stange, but the weather can play a major roll in the way people act. Is it too hot, to muggy, to rainey? Did something major happen in this time period years ago? Is she in menopause, on her monthy flow? Is she having money problems or problems with someone else. She may not be calling, because she may not want to burden you all with her problem. Let it slide... You may want to send her an email or text and say, Hey just wanted to let you know I care and love you and if you need anything let us know.. Your loving family... I am sure this will pass. Good Luck...

Definitely ignore it! Whatever they are going through, they are going through. It may or may not have anything to do with you. What possible good could come from you confronting them about it?

When I was in junior high (I think), my younger brother used to drive me crazy. He would say the most insensitive things, and he really hurt my feelings. I used to get upset with him all the time. One time he said, "Jen, the world does not revolve around you." Man was I p.o.'d!!! Years later, I realized that what he was really trying to say.

When someone is upset and mistreats you, most of the time it has nothing to do with you. They are just really wrapped up in their own problems and not even fully aware of you. Most people are actually very self-centered. I don't mean that in a bad way. I just mean that most of us live very busy lives, and we are very focused on our "to do" lists and all the happenings of our jobs, our kids, our spouses, etc. It's not that we don't care about other people. It's just that sometimes we forget to notice.

Don't worry about it, and definitely don't take it personally. Just let it go, and try to talk to them in a week or so. Family is so much more important that insensitive comments.

Edited to Add:
Ok, Momma11's answer was so much better than mine. You are crackin' me up!!!

Since you say your MIL has times of depression, then you can attribute her snappishness to illness.

But people all over are snappish. I hope you can take some comfort in the fact that 90 per cent of the time, when a person snaps at you, it has NOTHING to do with you (unless you are a truly disagreeable person - are you???)! Other things are going wrong, and perhaps the person was snapped at herself recently, and she's taking her feelings out on you without even realizing it.

Folks ought not to do that, of course, but they do. Always have. Let it teach you this: don't take *your* bad feelings out on your husband, your children, your dog, your neighbors, your postal carrier, your car, or the clerks at your grocery store. I know from experience that it takes a lot of practice!

At the same time, don't stew. Let it be the snapper's problem. You'll find out soon enough if you actually offended in some way, so use your mind to concentrate on whatever is more important at home right now.

And I'm with SLM - God knows everybody inside out (including me). I don't mind dumping my hurts on Him!

Catching flack from others for no apparent reason is baffling and frustrating. And it just happens – you have probably snapped at other people at least a few times in your life. You count on others to forgive you for your bad moments. Do the same for others.

I wouldn't ignore it, exactly, but be prepared to talk about it if the other parties seem to want to go into their apparent unhappiness with you. I'd want to know what their perspective was when the snapped. Had I just said or done something that set them off? Is it possible that there was a misunderstanding? Is an apology from me in order?

But I wouldn't beat it to death, either. If these folks just move forward and pretend nothing happened, be gracious enough to allow that. In families, in particular, we often need to keep offering (and receiving) space to be all of who we are, the beautiful and the ugly.

When someone snaps at me, I say--I can understand you are really upset about ________, but its not ok to talk to me rudely. I will talk to you when you are feeling better. I am hanging up now, CLICK. You don't excuse their behavior but you don't let them treat you like dirt either---

For your case, I would call MIL or send her an email and say that you know she is having a rough time with xyz, but she hurt your feelings when she said___________. What you would like is for her to say _____________ instead. You can ALWAYS ask for what you need and want-- you can't guarantee that you will get it, but its worth it to ask. Its also ok to hang up and say I am not ok with the way you are speaking to me. Call me back when you are calm and can be courteous and kind. Bye.

M