Emotional Boy

I have a two year old girl, and when she starts crying hysterically and won't stop, I have her sit down and then I leave her alone. I tell her she can get up when she is done crying. When she realizes that I am no longer listening to her she usually stops and then gets up. I ask her if she is better now and done crying and she says "ya". A lot of her crying is from being frustrated and not knowing how to express it. This might be his problem too. Good Luck!

Wow have I been there before! Ignore it, ignore it, ignore it. I do mean within reason. If he is hurt than tend to his needs but DO NOT do more than is nessassary. The more you react, the more it will happen. He is still young so he is going to have melt downs if he is over tierd or hungry. As a Mom I think you should trust your instinct. Our two oldest girls were both Very over emotional. We found with our oldest girl that no matter what there were times that she just needed to be put in her bed and let to cry it out. With the younger of the two we found that she would only do it if Dad was around. The way we made it though was to ignore it and most times just walk away. If they did not stop crying within a minute or so then we would let them know that they needed to go into the other room until they could get them selfs under control. We never yelled or made them think we were angry. Just that they needed some quiet time because no one else needed to listen to them scream. We would tell them that when they were done they could come out. It took AWHILE for our oldest, I wont lie. Also our second girl picked up on the idea right away. We like to think that it was because she saw how we never broke down with the oldest no matter how long it took. (some times upwards of an hour of screaming for attention!) We always made sure that they did not actually need anything and they did not hurt them selfs. We made sure that they understood that we were not mad but that it was important for them to lern how to control themselfs and their emotions. I hope this helps. It isn't an over night fix but it worked for us. Good Luck! -Y.

Sorry you are going through this. It's a VERY trying time as a mother. My second son acted a lot like this when he was 2 and 3 years old. I was at my wits end, I had no idea what to do and sometimes it was so bad I would tell my husband I was ready to give him away. I seriously thought he needed some kind of specialist to look at him it was so bad. But he out grew it! I am with Yevette IGNORE IT, Comfort him when needed but for the most part you just have to ignore it and eventually he will out grow it. Good luck during this time its exhausting but You can do it!

My son just turned three and my brother is five. The way I interact with my brother is completly diffrent then my mom. My son never throws fits because he knows they don't work my brother crys all the time except when he is with me. We went out once and he tried crying about a toy and time out and everything else I ignore him the only time he gets his way is through good behavior not crying. Even if he gets hurt I tell him to take a deep breath and talk to me that crying is not gonna help. His behavior at my house is wonderful he knows how the system here works. The best thing you can do is remember that they are little sponges they do what you teach them.

Children can be extremely emotional due to many different causes, be it environmental, psychological, and even physical. I would take him to a good naturopath such as Dr. Jodi Berg in downtown Everett and find out if he has a food allergy or other disorder. (I get very emotional when I eat the wrong things), or if it's something else. Did something change in his environment recently. Has this always happened? Are you a working mom? Maybe he misses you. Some children need more active parental involvement than others. Make sure you're spending enough one-on-one time with him. If not, his crying will be his way of demanding more attention. Children NEED our attention. When they act this way (my daughter does this) then we need to stop and give them this attention for as long as they need it. Again, I'm shooting in the dark here because I don't have much information from you. Maybe something traumatic happened to him that you're not aware of??

God bless. I hope you get to the bottom of this.

I am going through the same thing with my 18 month old right now. The emotional outbursts are easy to control (ignore) during the day but its the ones at night that I have trouble with. It takes hours sometimes to get him to sleep at night (he is still in our room on a bed next to ours for this reason) and night wakings are the worst because he can't seem to calm his self down after he has worked himself up. Anyway, mainly wanted to let you know that you are not alone and hopefully we well be able to find ways to get throught this. :)

Validate his feelings...he is thinking you don't understand what he is feeling...he is not able to communicate this to you. So validate Did that scare you? Did that hurt your heart? When he finally says yes he should calm down a little. Once he does, reasure him that he is safe and in good hands. He needs to feel safe. Then drop the subject until the next episode..they should dwindle down. He will get that you are on the same page as him.

EM

J.-

The best advice I can offer is this- When your son has a meltdown, try to voice his feelings for him. At this age, he has very strong emotions, but very little vocabulary to name them. When he falls down and starts to cry, it may be pain but it may also be fear. You can ask "did you scare yourself?" or "do you have an owie?". When he's screaming at you for taking away a toy you can tell him that you know that he's dissapointed and angry, but the toy has to go up for now. You can also try re-directing his interest and see if another activity, toy, or something to drink will help him deal with his hurt feelings.

I'm dealing with the same problem in my 1 1/2 year old boy. And as a mom of 3, it isn't always easy to respond promptly to every demand. Be it the kids, the housework or the phone, there's always something.

Best of luck to you. And remember that this time in your son's life will be short. It doesn't feel like it, but you both will get through this stage just fine.

-B.-

Great Advice - I have to tell you though, this is a major attention grabber, and 2 to 3 years old is when they try to get their ways, and it is now that you need to put the foot down. My son would throw himself on the floor, the whole nine yards. This happened a few times and we quickly nipped it in the bud! My pediatrition advised us that when our son went thru this to say, calmly, when you are done having a fit, or acting this way, or tell him exactly what he is doing, you can come find me. And leave the room. Dont watch him have a fit, completely leave the room. If he follows, peel him off you, and leave. They find out real quick, when I act this way, my mommy leaves. They dont like that at that age. =-)

Good Luck!

I too have an emotional little boy that is 2 1/2 right now. He started doing the exact same thing yours and the only way I could handle it was to sit him on the couch for a time out for 2 min. which usually work. He would stop crying and go on his way. We still use that method and it seems to work great,I have been told it is a phase and eventually he will grow out of it. Don't get mad and yell at him it just makes it worst. After my son was done with time out I would tell why he was in time out give him a hug and tell him I love him and that's how we got thru it.