Fostering Independent Play

It's not good for kids to have 100% of attention all the time. We do kids no favor by not teaching them how to enterain themselves. When my kids were infants, able to sit up on their own, they got playpen time and when they were toddlers, I would baby gate them in their rooms for short periods to play. It's okay for adults to be in the room or in the house, doing other things or just not paying attention to her even if they don't specifically have anything else to do. She should be able to entertain herself with her toys.

You need to find a few toys that can hold her attention for a long time. Give her some direction before she starts playing, so she has some ideas of things to do.
A play kitchen is awesome at this age. She can pretend to cook, make a picnic lunch, wash dishes, etc. She can sort types of food, types of dishes and silverware. You can also have her build a fort, or buy a tent and put a bunch of books and pillows in there, plus some favorite dolls or stuffed animals so she can snuggle up and have a little bit of quiet time.

Set her up with some blocks and figures and tell her to build a farm for her horses, or whatever she is into. My kids would spend hours with the little Jenga blocks and our bigger block set and add ponies or other plastic figures or the chess pieces, or all of them, and pretend it was a farm or a town or whatever. You can give advice or direction, but tell her you are busy now and she needs to play by herself. They would also take all of their stuffed animals and set them around in groups and pretend they were in a field and "run" some animals over to another group to "talk" or put them in strollers and take "walks" with them, etc. But I never felt guilty for not having time to play with them, they needed to learn to play alone. You may also want to talk to the grandparents and daddy to give her some space. If she is continuously entertained she may never develop the imagination to keep herself busy.
Or give her some pots and pans and wooden spoons and dry macaroni or goldfish/cheerios and tell her she can"cook" too.

Our DS is 15 months old, he's largely independent and self sufficient at playing. He's also clingy and cautious about new situations and people, and needs to be given time to take things in and decide to leave mommy's or daddy's side, and won't be forced to go and play until he's ready. When he decides he is ready though, he couldn't care whether we were there or not.

I was concerned about his independence and thought he was too much the loner. Our ped counseled us to be wary not to undermine the independence, and not to step into his games unless he asked us to. Or say 10 minutes at a time every half hour or 45 minutes or so.

With that in mind, take a good look at your daughter when she's playing, if there are times that she seems content without your input, step back. Don't give 110% because the others do, or because you feel she needs it, she very well might not.

Good luck to you and yours,
F. B.