Need Help- Wedding/pastor/going Crazy : )

Updated on January 03, 2010
A.B. asks from Cleveland, TN
7 answers

I recently got engaged and I have no idea where to start on getting someone to marry us or where to do it. I wanted to get married on St. Patrick's day (March 17th) because I have a small obsession with clovers and I want to start off with some good luck. I want something very very small with maybe 10 people there and very very casual. Does anyone have any ideas?????

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K.R.

answers from Memphis on

Have you tried the Justice of Peace? My husband and I got married downtown at Candle Light Weddings (10 years ago) and it was in an intimate setting. Both sides of our family was there to witness. After you get your marriage license, they may be able to help you at the Justice of Peace.

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B.H.

answers from Memphis on

You picked a great date! My husband and I were married on March 17th also! We decided to throw caution to the wind and elope. It was such a great decision! I'm not a fan of Branson, (actually had never been there until we got married and haven't been back since) but we went up there under the disguise of a concert. I made little postcards with a really cheesy poem and mailed them off the day we left. We actually drove to Eureka Springs and met a woman (whom I found on the internet) at a gazeebo at the top of the highest place in town. It overlooked the whole town and was absolutely beautiful! She gave us a little gift and took all the pictures we wanted. The actual ceremony was over in 15 minutes! Then we drove to a cavern and walked through. We were the only ones there and the guy was so nice. When he asked why we were there and we told him we had just gotten married minutes before, he told us it usually took 30 minutes to walk through but for us it would probably take longer and that was fine! That was funny to us (and no...we didn't take longer!)
The best part about the experience was that we were not on a time frame, we were completely alone, and we got to splurge on US instead of a wedding!
It's not for everyone and some people would rather elope to Europe or a beach...I being one of them:) BUT, it turned out perfect for us. Eureka Springs is such a cute little town with tons of scenery and a great "walking" downtown atmosphere with antique shops, tourist shops with fudge etc., and the prettiest courthouse to take pictures!

Anyway! Just thought I'd share!
P.S. In honor of St. Patty's Day we wrote on our SUV in Green and secretly stashed 4 leaf clovers under our clothes so we could "find" them later. Really a great intimate experience! Everyone loved the postcard and had a reception for us after we got back.

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R.B.

answers from Nashville on

My husband and I got married in a little chapel in Gallatin, TN. This was 13 years ago but it only cost $129 which my in-laws paid for. We had a minister to marry us and a photographer. We were allowed 12 guests. All we had to do was show up at the right time. I wore a lace dress and cowgirl boots, my husband wore jeans, a white shirt and cowboy boots. We spent an additional $20 on a small bouquet for me and a flower for his shirt. We had a small reception with cake and coffee at his mother's afterwards. I don't remember the name of the chapel but I'm sure there would be some listed in the yellow pages.

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A.F.

answers from Nashville on

My husband and I had a very small wedding 7 years ago with just our immediate family with a luncheon at our favorite restraunt afterward. We had ours in a garden (maybe your could find a clover field! To find a minister you can talk to friend and family or just call christian churches. If you don't attend church you will have to find someone willing to marry you and probably take a marriage class with that minister beforehand. We also had a reception a month later so that we could celebrate with all of those family and friends that hadn't been invited to the wedding. Just realize some family are going to be upset and feel left out but it's your wedding and you want if you only want ten people you shouldn't feel too guilty. Don't let anyone else try to control your wedding (I had issues with my motherinlaw wanting to do it her way). Good luck and don't stress too much! We planned ours in 3 months!

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K.P.

answers from Memphis on

Congratulations on your engagement and forthcoming marriage! :-) You're doing the right thing so far -- looking at what you really want, and figuring out how to get it.

Since you're wanting a small affair and very casual, you could get married at the Courthouse with a Justice of the Peace with your close friends in attendance. Or you can see if the JP or a local minister would do the honors in another location like your home or a friend's home, or even something like a local reception hall or something. Many pastors will not marry those whom they don't know, or who are not members of their church; but some will. You may or may not find an accommodating church -- many churches will only allow their facilities to be used by their members; plus with Mar 17 being a Wednesday, many churches have youth meetings or other meetings that day, so may not have space available.

I'm leaning more towards a small home wedding with a judge officiating -- you may need to check your state laws about who is authorized to perform a wedding. In my state (Mississippi), a blood test is required to check for STDs, plus the couple must apply for the marriage license at least 3 weeks or perhaps 30 days prior to the actual wedding, so you'd want to check to make sure you get everything done right. Because my sister was too young to marry without parental consent (age 21 in MS), she and her now-ex-husband crossed the state line into TN (age 18 is the minimum there) where they went to a courthouse and got married on the courthouse steps -- there was no waiting period or anything. If you find that your state has too many restrictions, or you're having trouble lining up a minister or judge, you may be able to get married in another state.

Or perhaps you'd like a courthouse wedding with a party or reception at your home or a friend's home. Most people used to get married at their homes, surrounded by their friends and family, and that sounds like a fun idea to me.

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K.S.

answers from Raleigh on

This is what I would do. Call the court and see what you have to do to have them marry you. Once you get a time etc,
Call a wonderful restaurant and make a reservation for ten, try to get a room of your own, or a nice round table. Order flowers for the table, order a dessert or cake. Buy a dress you love that you can wear again. Hire a photographer to film the whole thing.
Another idea. If there is a bed and breakfast near you, contact them, and ask for their help. You can have the ceremony there and the reception.
I would opt for my first plan, because, that is my style.
We got married on a base on Italy 44 yrs ago, with 4 of his buddies and some wives. I have on a short lovely outfit that my mother had made for me. 44 yrs later, none of that matters, just us matters. Good luck.
Money really tight? Take everyone to the courthouse and then to someone's house and have it catered or bring in trys from costco. What matters is the love you feel.

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W.M.

answers from Nashville on

Decide if you want it at a church or not. The first thing to do is find out where you want it. You could have it at a park, at a mansion that you rent, on a cruise, in Vegas, at a church, at someone's home, etc anywhere you want! Then you ask around for referrals of who to marry you. If you have a church, you get your Pastor/Preacher to do it. If not, look in the phone book! Then you secure the date at the place you want asap since you want it in March. You decide who is coming and get your invitations ordered or make them yourself if you only want 10 ppl. You choose your flowers and get them ordered, then your cake. The place you have your wedding is not necessarily where you will have your reception. You can have that anywhere you want to have it. That must be booked asap too! You can do this all yourself w/out hiring a planner. I did mine myself. You can then see if the place you are having your reception serves food. If they do, talk to them about a menu. If they do not, you can have whoever you want to cater it. You can even buy the food yourself and have close family friends or aquaintances work it for you. I had some of a my mom's friends cater it w/ food I bought and then had a friend of a friend be the bartender and we bought all the wine, beer, etc ourselves. Much cheaper.
Choose who will be in your wedding party and get dresses and tuxes ordered. You can do this all before March but you have to start a notebook and a list of what to do in what order and get it all booked right away. My husband and I went on a cruise and got married while in Jamaica. It was perfect! then we came home and had a reception so that family and friends could be a part of it. With only 10 ppl coming, you may want to go away and do it. If you do it in Vegas or the beach or a cruise, all you have to do is show up in your gown. The resorts and places like that do it all for you! Cake and all. Congrats!!! I love weddings, have fun!

ps/ go online or into craft stores to find the shamrock decor you want!

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