What Is Too Late to Have a Kid?

Updated on April 05, 2016
S.S. asks from Seattle, WA
24 answers

What age do you think is too old to have kids? Is having them in mid 30's old?

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D.K.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I hope that's not old. I had my son when I was 40. Took all of two weeks to get pregnant. Completely uneventful pregnancy and delivery. The mind numbing tiredness was no different than when I was a resident. There is a higher incident of Down syndrome/trisomy 21 and I would NOT have considered the pregnancy without an amniocentesis.

5 moms found this helpful

M.D.

answers from Washington DC on

I had mine at 20, 22, and 24. My little sister had hers at 20 and 27. My older sister had hers at 32 and 34. Both of my sisters want one more. It's totally up to you!!

There are pros and cons to having kids early versus late, and it completely depends on the person.

3 moms found this helpful
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P.G.

answers from Dallas on

I hope not. I had mine when I was 39.

Fertility does drop off somewhat sharply after 35, so it's usually HARDER to get pregnant. But if you want kids, and feel like you have the energy, then have them.

3 moms found this helpful

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A.L.

answers from Atlanta on

I had my first at 37 and second (last) at 40. Yes, I was advanced maternal age for both of them, however I had no problems with diabetes or anything like that. It actually took longer to get Child #1 started than Child #2 and the delivery was easier with Child #2 also. Child #2 also grew more (child #1 was low birth weight) and has been easier to feed generally than Child #1. Neither child had any long-term health issues. I also am absolutely sure that I was more ready to be a parent in my late 30s than I was in my 20s. I guess my main point is that 'too old' depends entirely on the person, the couple, and their life situation.

4 moms found this helpful

S.G.

answers from Los Angeles on

I don't know too many women who have kids before their mid thirties. The women I know finish university, then go on to establish a career, then get married and set up a household and only have children once they are financially secure enough to leave their jobs and stay at home with their kids. I don't think there is a too old, as long as you are still of child bearing age.

3 moms found this helpful
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M.G.

answers from Portland on

No. I had some of mine later than that.

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E.T.

answers from Rochester on

I had my first when I was 36 and my husband was 40. Our second was born two years later. I was considered "advanced maternal age" with my first, but had no problems. If you are healthy, mid 30s is not too old.

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E.B.

answers from Beaumont on

I had my first at 40!! It's a little harder, energy wise but they keep you young! Go for it!

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C.C.

answers from Orlando on

I had my first at 35 and my second at 43. Some things cannot be planned or predicted.
Mid 30's is not too old in my opinion. It will throw you into the "Advanced Maternal Age" category which I was not happy to be labelled as, but you do have to be monitored for certain conditions the older you are(Gestational diabetes, high blood pressure, etc) can be more common conditions for "older" moms.

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

It all depends on your particular situation. It would be too old for me, but that's me.
If you have the desire, the health, the ability to support a kid, and your partner/spouse is on board, go for it.

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C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

I think it's best to finish college and graduate school (or whatever higher level career training you want) before having kids. So mid 30s is the perfect age IMHO. For me after 40 is too old because of being too tired to deal with having an infant and young child - not to mention there are more health risks involved.

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S.L.

answers from Des Moines on

Absolutely not too old! I know a number of women having one or two in their 40's...some got pregnant naturally, some were IVF. Either way, it's an individual thing. Kids are a lot of work. I've seen 45 year olds with the energy of a teenager and I've seen 20 year olds who acted like seniors.

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K.A.

answers from San Diego on

I didn't even have my first until I was 30. I went on to have a second at 33 and I was almost 39 when my third was born. So my answer is mid 30s is not even remotely old.

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J.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

Since 35+ is considered AMA...I would have been nervous past then. I delivered my kids at 28, 31 and 34 but I seem to be on the younger side compared to my oldest daughter's friends moms.

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N.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

I think if you want to have a child and you can get pregnant then go for it.

My hubby's grandmother had her last child in her 60s. Seriously! When he goes to do any genealogy they always pop her name up for verification. So there isn't any age that's too late.

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B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

We had our son when I was 36.
With what my energy level feels like right now (son is now 17) - I wouldn't do it much later than that.
We're going on college tours now and I just can't keep up.
Some women have kids in their 40's (and some women can try all they want but they just can't get pregnant at that age) but they are like 60 when their kids are 20 - and they aren't going to have a lot of time to get to know any potential grand kids.

1 mom found this helpful

A.G.

answers from Dallas on

I was 27 and 34 and it has worked out well. Most of my friends have been in their mid thirties when they have had children. They wanted to get their careers going first just like I did. Each person needs to do what works for her family.

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B.D.

answers from Pittsburgh on

I had my first at 30 and second at 33. My feet felt it more carrying the second but that resolved itself.

My girlfriend had her one and only at 41. She had a difficult pregnancy and to this day complains that she has never been the same since delivery. She also feels she doesn’t have all of the energy he requires.

I think age and pregnancy is a very personal thing.

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N.G.

answers from Boston on

Just as one mama did not like hearing she was "old" at 37, some mamas who are 63 cringe at her analogy. Be careful with ageism.

No, if you can get pregnant then nature is telling you hat you are not too old. Best wishes.

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J.M.

answers from San Francisco on

I had my daughter at age 37, so no, I don't think mid 30s is old. I personally did not want to be pregnant and having babies after 40. But that was just my thing.

I will tell you though, that after 35 one is considered "of advanced maternal age." I hated that!! I felt like I was 63 years old.

I think "too old" should be defined by you, your doctor and your partner, after getting sufficient information about the risks.

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F.B.

answers from New York on

I got married at 33 and had my sons at 35 and 40. Thankfully both are healthy. I can't turn back my own clock but I wish I was ready to have kids before 30 when I still had the energy to party all night and go to work the next day

1 mom found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from Santa Barbara on

I am not sure what age I think is too old. It really depends on the person (more of a personality thing vs age thing). Yes and no to being in your mid thirties.

If you are really in Seattle, you will most likely fit right in and not feel old or young. My friend moved to a small town in a southern state and felt like an old mom (she was 34 for her last kid).

I know several profession moms who had the first at age 36 and the second at 38. Many doctors say after age 38 it when it really gets harder to become pregnant.

Several others are in their mid-late 40's in the kindergarten class. There are few mothers under 30 with a kinder child.

I think 43 is the age that is the oldest out of my friends to deliver a baby. I do not know it the child was naturally conceived.

1 mom found this helpful

D.B.

answers from Boston on

I think the range has increased steadily over the past few decades. Now it's not unusual to see women in their early 40s having a baby. Certain factors may affect fertility as one gets older, but other developments have increased the odds. I think the greatest risk is with very young women who lack the perspective, the wisdom, the experience and a mature partner, frankly. But those of us who were in our late 30s (even a decade or 2 ago) certainly wouldn't say mid-30s is old!!!

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M.J.

answers from Sacramento on

I know few who had kids younger than their 30s. College and careers came first, which is a smart move on many levels. I don't think any age is too old ... you just need to be really ready for it. I didn't have my kids until my 30s and it was the right time, for sure.

1 mom found this helpful
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