Do People Not PLAN Special Occasions in Advance?

It would be impossible for me to agree with you more!

If more women would actually talk with their partner about their expectations as related to mother's day instead of complaining about it on mamapedia then maybe they'd be happier.

But then again I'm also one of those weirdos who feel that my husband should be honoring his mother and not me on mother's day *shrug*. We are having his mom over for a BBQ and I get to sleep in. That's it and I'm fine with it - I don't need one special day with lots of material gifts. I'm lucky enough to be appreciated all year round!

i guess not everyone has it all figured out like you do.

I don't have a hubby to worry about - but I do have a 14 year old son that I am trying to teach the importance of gift giving to, plus I expect him, at this age, to put some thought/effort into honoring me :P

So, I told him what I expected for tomorrow - in fact, took him with me to my hair cut appointment at my salon. When I was done, I paid and went and waited in the car while he and the owner figured out my Mother's Day present. I know I will love because she and I already narrowed it down to several options. LOL

I have decided on lunch and a movie for tomorrow and since it is Mother's Day I get to pick both and he has to smile and be a polite teen and enjoy whatever what I choose.

I expect to have a lovely day!!!

Happy Mother's Day to all you beautiful Moms.

God Bless

Some women like things to be a surprise, especially on Mother's Day. There are certain special occasions that I don't think you should have to plan for or be worried about (like birthday, Mother's Day). Some people are not planners. Some plan & then things go awry, anyway. I'd like to think that a grown, fully functioning male can take the initiative every once in a while instead of being told what to do or have everything micro managed for him.

I plan everything. I'm a HUGE planner though. I get all antsy if I don't know what's going on.

I think that most women think that their spouses should plan things for Mother's Day. It's the ONE day of the year that us Moms aren't SUPPOSE to plan, kwim? Of course, lots of us wind up being disappointed. I would love for my husband to get me a gift, heck, even a card! But he won't. I know he won't. I still get disappointed, but I know I shouldn't. I feel like if I have to tell him to get me something, that sort of takes the magic out of it.

So, instead, he'll let me have a few drinks and he'll take care of the kids. I won't have to change dirty diapers or worry about "Mommy, I want this." It's not fireworks or roses, but it's better than nothing :D

I have to agree with you there, J..

The only Mother's Day that got me into a tizzy was the first. Our son had been born about a month or so before the day, and after all of the waiting I had done to be a mother, all the losses I had endured before our little one came along-- being able to feel like I could "legitimately" celebrate Mother's Day was a milestone for me. My husband had a card for me, but had been so busy taking care of us that he couldn't think beyond that and his work. (Granted, he did take 3 weeks of paternity leave, which was huge for him because he was the only person in his department and was vital to the daily operations of the company, but I was far more hormonal at that point and couldn't perceive that he'd only *just* gone back to work when the holiday came along.)

This year, sweet man made us dinner reservations for this evening, and hired a sitter. He didn't surprise me because I have dietary concerns and knows I need to eat at a certain time each day. This has helped me to be able to eat this afternoon in preparation for a later meal. I love him for this lack of surprise on the day itself. I hadn't expected anything other than a card, and he really delighted me when he told me we were going out for dinner. "You've worked really hard, and it's important." he said.

All this to say, yes, planning is a good thing.

I have to wonder too-- I have seen so many posts on Mother's Day this year. I don't recall seeing this many previously. Is it such a huge deal? What's stood out to me were a couple posts which seemed inflexible on the idea of Mother's Day being celebrated on Any Other Day. This is odd to me; I celebrate Solstice or Christmas or Halloween with friends for whom it is more convenient to get together at other times than on that specific date. But we all have our own stuff.... I've got mine, but Mother's Day isn't one of them.

Agreed, ask for what you need.

I know and I totally agree...if you are not happy with what happened...its' YOUR fault for not SAYING what you want/expect. I am never disappointed becasue like you, hubby and I PLAN our weekends...every weekend and especially HOLIDAY weekends. So I too just don't get it!

I plan special occasions/events except my birthday and mother's day. I want my family to surprise me for a change but they know I don't want them to go all out...just surprise me w/ something thoughtful.

You never know someones complete circumstances.
This year I spaced and forgot it was Mothers Day...between my MIL going in the hospital, easter, my birthday, my MIL being rushed back to the hospital for hemorrhaging, spending time with her, getting a letter for a job interview and trying to find an alternative babysitter so I can go....not to mention a few other things...I didn't realize it was Mother's day tomorrow.
My BF is notoriously bad at these things, and was raised in a family where you specifically state what you want, and you plan it down to the detail..while I was raised in a house were you do absolutely nothing and you get completely surprised.
The most we discussed is what we should get his mom. Will I be a little hurt tomorrow if I don't get a card...yes. Am I expecting fireworks...no. Given the circumstances my SO and myself have a ton on our minds right now...but it still doesn't mean it's not partially my day to and I want to be remembered...I think since I am taking care of his mom, he should take care of me.
I don't mean any of this to be rude....but there can be a million reasons why women will feel dissapointed tomorrow...not just because they didn't speak up.
Hope you have a great mother's day. =)

I have to work real hard at planning. It doesn't come naturally for me.
But I did tell my hubby last week that a brunch would be nice, so since he's a planner he made the reservations.
And my poor kids, I haven't planned a birthday party in two years for them. I can't get my head wrapped around them.

some people can plan all they want but if, say, their husband, perhaps, has other ideas, ahem, it may not go the way they want. :)

I'm a planner, every new year one of the first things i do is mark everyones birthdays on the new callendar, i start saving for Christmas 6 months in advanced. I like freash flowers, i have every petal from every bouguet of flowers my husband has given me over the past almost 30 years, planning does go along way, I am the type of person who i want things done yesterday, being organized goes a long way as well and planning a head is a form of being organized. J.

Tomorrow is mother's day. I have planned nothing, bought nothing for the MIL, etc. Part of the reason is that I have given hints to what I'd like, even leave print out for him, etc. and in the end he doesn't go out and get it because he decided that I didn't need that so I end up disappointed and with nothing. Part of the non-planning is that if its supposed to be a day to celebrate me, why do I need to plan it? If its supposed to be my family 'SHOWING' how they feel about me, what does it mean when they plan nothing? That they don't care? That they are lazy?

Yes the kids give hugs and 'Happy's but its also a test for hubby's, that the guys in my family tend to always fail. Which we then use as an excuse to recipricate on Father's day ...