Keep Bugging the Ex About Xmas Presents?

I say no, let him be, he's resposible for his relationship with his kids and like you said that's the reason you divorced... You are doing a good job. In fact I think he's more likely to change if you stay out of it. At least that has happened with my husband. Best of luck to you!

M.

I'm a stepmom. My stepdaughter never comes to us with any Xmas or bday presents (to her dad or even me -- well, I'm expected to not receive anything). And it's reciprocated...we don't shop with stepdaughter for her mom (even on Mother's day).

I agree with the other mamas here. Arrange for someone else to take the kids shopping for you. Continue doing what you do for their father. You are teaching them valuable lessons, and at the same time you are being true to your own character and not discontinuing the gift-giving to the father out of spite. The situation is a shame, but you even said yourself, this is the reason you are divorced. At least you don't have to deal with it on a daily, minute-to-minute basis anymore!

I would say that it must just be the stupidness in men that don't see that it is for the kids to give the gift its not like they are giving you the gift themselves. I do the same thing for my kids and their dad. We go get a card and a small gift it may just be his favorit candy or something but they wrap it and give it to him. I want my kids to relize that its just as fun to give as it is to recive something. I would keep doing it for the dad and the girlfirend and let the kids know that it is the right thing to do and some people just don't like to do the right thing. AS for them getting a gift for you, if your 15 year old is responsible enough to watch the 5 year old maybe you could have the 5 year old earn some money at home with you and take both of them to the store and pick a place you will be and let the two of them go around and get you a gift and go pay for it and have the cashier bag it a few times so you wont see it. Then the little one learns to earn money and get you a gift without putting a burnden on their father and your little one wont feel bad any more.

I believe you buying dad a present is great. You are teaching them selfless gifts. Do not try to have dad buy you a present to. I would give the older boy money to give to his little sister to buy you something. Just make sure he does not tell her that the money is from you. Make something up. take care and Good luck

Don't expect anything from your ex-husband. Thats why he is an EX! Keep doing what your doing and when your children are older they will remember the fine lesson that you have taught them. Good Luck!

Perhaps next year make the gift giving about "doing things for others." Instead of giving gifts to Dad or Mom, perhaps the best gift could be volunteering or planting a tree in your yard. You can plan this with your children, explain that the gift you really want is for them to share a special day with you doing something for others ...and make it happen!

Then take each kid separately to buy a gift for their sibling. This will give you time with each of them individually too!

If they want to do something for Dad, inspire them (and their father) to "do something for others!"

J.... I'm a single mom and have dealt with the same thing. If your ex was a selfish sob, he probably will remain that way. Give up on thinking that he will change for any reason. Since Christmas has gotten so commercial, teaching your children that a gift from the heart is as valuable as one bought. Have your 15 year old work with your 5 year old in creating something for you. (like a handmade ornament for the tree, a drawing that can be framed, etc...) My children are 21 and 16 and I still have ornaments made by them when they were little. I cherish those things made by them for me. I also have drawings that they drew and are now framed. You could also encourage them to "make" something for him as well, instead of purchasing something. If he doesn't appreciate the effort, then that's his problem. Your children will soon learn how he is and can choose themselves if they want to be so selfish, or caring as yourself. My guess, they will want to please, (as most children do) and the will model what you teach them. Good Luck... T.

This type of situation is new to me however you stated the kids were 15 & 5....Why not let the 15 year old pick out a couple gifts for you.
Next Christmas or Birthday, take the kids to the mall give them a amount of money you feel comfortable with (or a gift card for your favorite store) and go have a cup of coffee in the food court while they do a lil shopping. I'm sure the 15 yr old can help the younger one pick out a gift.
I think this would make them feel better knowing mom has something to open too!! I have always tried to spend all our christmas money on the kids & they have brought it to our attention that that's not the meaning of the holiday & were upset that Dad & I had put our gifts on hold till after the holidays.
If, as you said, these are some of the reason's you divorced in the first place then expecting him to do something kind (if only for the kids sake) is looking for too much. Take the high road (as you have been) and still continue with gifts for Dad (the girlfriend gift was certainly beyond the high road....)But if they feel they want to include the girlfriend by all means you are sending the right message to your kids....He should be doing the same..but you can't change a leopards spots right? Just try to get past it....
Next time, give them the gift card, let them shop...you know you will get something you like if it's from a favorite store...the kids will know they gave you a gift from them without any parental stress involved. I had a friend who even gave the kids a certain amount of money thru out the year based on chores,that they put on gift cards...the kids could spend it on themselves or save it up till the end of the year to buy gifts for the parents....something to think about....hope it helps....lisa...

i think you should have you kids make his gift you dont need to spend any money and it is still special but dont buy his cheap butt anything

You could speak with him about this if you have not already done so, citing the benefits of the children learning to give to others, and see what he thinks. However, as thoughtful as you may be for helping the kids give him presents, you two are divorced, therefore this is not something he is obligated to do for you. And, if your ex-husband's thoughtlessness was one of the underlying reasons for the divorce, I wouldn't expect a miraculous change within him now. Keep in mind that if you have them 95% of the time, then he may just not have the time to take them shopping for you.

If the only reason you want him to take the kids present shopping for you is to teach them the benefits of giving, then I would suggest asking another friend or family member take them shopping for your gifts. Or, if all else fails, take your children to the mall, and sit outside a store while the two of them go in to get you something. I have also found that homemade gifts make the best presents if you are trying to teach them about the spirit of giving. Because they have put time and energy into creating something, I believe (especially for the 5 year-old) they will feel very proud and excited to give you their gift.

That's crappy. Give someone you can trust the job of shopping with your kids for you, a friend or relative. There's no point to starting a big fight about buying presents, kinda defeats the purpose.

How frustrating!!! What a loser that ex-husband of yours is. However, I would continue your thoughtful practice of taking your kids to get him presents. Don't stoop to his petty level. You are setting a wonderful example for your children, and I think you're setting an even more important example for them by showing them that you will continue to do the right thing, even in the face of your husband's lack of maturity and kindness. Perhaps you could let your kids know that you would love something homemade (drawings, clay sculptures, paintings, paint your own pottery, etc.) from them even more than an item from a store. Yes, some of these activitues take money, but they probably have access to some art supplies at home or at school. Also, they could make "coupon books" with items such as an extra hug, cleaning the crud out from under the couch cushions, etc. That way, your kids will not need to rely on your husband. Your older child might need to help the younger one a bit, but he sounds far more reliable than your ex. By the way, congratulations on your career move!

J. T,
First let me give you kudos for setting an excellent example for your children. It's obivious that your ex is not going to assist your children in giving you presents on your special days and don't change what you are doing. It's wonderful that you are teaching them that it is important for them to think about others. I really admire the fact that you make sure the gift is something that your ex will like.

I noticed that your oldest demanded that your ex take him to get a gift, so it's working. In regards to your youngest who did not have any money to purchase you a gift why don't you give her something to do around the house or give her an allowance so that she'll have money to purchase you a gift.

Don't let your ex make you change, continue to do what you are doing.

YOU ARE AWESOME!

Unfortunately, you can't make "him" do things anymore. Reasoning also will not work, don't waste your time. Your job now is to teach your children the magic of gift giving. You can enjoy shopping with them and have them wrap it up for you, so what if you pay for it. They will still be excited to do this for you. Also, the best gifts I have received from my children were things they thought of and made for me. If you make time to teach them, the gifts will come. Also, part of the learning will involve gifts for "him". Remember, you don't need "him", take care of things yourself!

I think that you should continue to get him Christmas presents with the kids. Your kids obviously love to do that with you and like you said, they are learning how to think of others. You are doing a good job!!! It is sad how selfish your ex husband is being. I would explain to him why and what you have been doing this present thing for. He should understand that you trying to teach your kids something. Maybe he will eventually decide to do the same for you. He should be ashamed of himself for making your child pay for a gift when he could have easily bought it. But look at it this was, when he told your son that he would have to use his money, your son chose to do that. Your son has learned what you have been trying to teach him!!! He loves you so much and thought about you and didn't care if he had to spend his own money, you are the bigger person here!! Give yourself a hug mom!!

Like a pp, getting your son to help out his little sister is a great idea. Do you have any friends who would take them shopping? Maybe one of your family/friends would step in and help. Sometimes all you need to do is ask for help and family/friends are quite willing to step up. Having another person help him out like this may be another way to teach him about giving and honoring his mother. If the person is a male it may also help show him how a man is supposed to treat their mother and sister. It's all about respect. It sounds like you have set a good example and now he needs to start thinking a bit on his own.

About your ex, it's time now for your son to step up and be the big brother here too. But if he needs some gentle encouragement from you, I would still give it. Taking the high road now, as you've done previously, will help you in the long run. It sounds like your son already sees his father for what he is. Kids are pretty smart and usually see things for what they really are as they mature.

Good luck. And remember to remind your son that it is not about the money he spends, but the thought he puts into the gift. A letter or something hand made is always a welcome thoughtful gift.

There is no point in YOU pushing it, IME/IMO. If he's not going to do it, he's not going to do it. While I agree with you that it is def. the parents' role to make sure that the kids honor the other parent at Christmas/birthdays/father's/mother's day, not everyone does this. Is there someone else close to your kids (grandmother, aunt, family friend) who can encourage your kids and take them shopping? Talk to someone like that and let them know that you'd like their help. That's a less antagonistic way of handling it. Good luck.

Your ex sounds like a real putz - but as you say, that's why you're no longer with him!
Here's an idea - you could shift the responsibility of getting your ex a gift, from you to your son. 15 is old enough to buy and wrap a gift. You can remind your son and even help him fund the gift if he needs, but that way you would be investing less time and energy at least. Your son would still be remembering his dad and would be assuming some more responsibility. As for your daughter, in my opinion a child that young should not really be expected to give a bought gift. Why not encourage her to make her dad a special Christmas card or drawing or a simple ornament? Again less effort for you, and should be MORE special to him. And I would suggest to her that she can do the same for your Christmas gift and you will cherish anything she makes. Good luck.

Hi J.,
Unfortunately you cannot force your ex to display genorosity and good manners. My sister-in-law had the same problem, so I began taking her children to shop for a gift for her for all gift giving occasions. Is there someone else who could help?
For the sake of your children, designate another adult you trust your children to, give them some cash, and let them shop for you. While it is unfortunate that you will be buying your own gift, your childrens sense of accomplishment is far more important that the price of a gift.

That is really petty, and it must be a tough pill to swallow for you. However, I would definately continue to help the kids buy your ex gifts. Don't make a big deal of it, and don't let the kids know that you think their dad is being a jerk. The example you set for your kids through this kind of generosity will stay with them. They will remember what you did as they get older and I believe grow to appreciate it even more than they already probably do. Maybe if this girlfriend has any character about her, she will appreciate the fact that you helped the kids get her something, and maybe she will want to return the gesture. Unfortunately as far as your husband goes, it is probably a case of "a leopard doesn't change his spots"! Good luck! :)

Hi J.,

How about telling the kids that they need to make Dad a gift? I wouldn't continue to shop for him -- he sounds like a real jerk! But you do want your kids to think of others, so they can make something. This may be stupid, according to your 15 year old, but if he can't come up with something, have him search the internet for ideas.

V. t.

I absolutely agree with you, your children should see how good it feels to give gifts to their parents. However, I don't think you should include your ex-husband at all. You should make a Christmas wish list for yourself and give it to your kids, making sure that each item is something nice that they can MAKE or DO for you. After all, aren't those the nicest presents? Maybe next year do that for your ex as well.

Sounds like you have resolved your issues. Good luck and have a wonderful New Year

Rise above him. Or, I should say, continue to rise above him, since you take your children present shopping for their dad.

There may be any reason from ineptness to spitefullness that he may not be helping the kids, but you don't need to figure it out. And, in my opinion, making a big deal about it would impact the kids and not the ex.

If your kids *want* to get you a present, take them to an appropriate store and let the 15 year old help the 5 year old shop. Or set your 5 year old down with art supplies and ask for a nice drawing.

Anyway, next year your daughter will be in school, or maybe Girl Scouts, and a lot of times they make presents as a holiday activity. Then !Voila! the problem will be solved.

(I'm also a late 40s divorced mother of two, and am familiar with the games exs can play.)

As a step-parent who has 80% custody of my step daughter, we have never received a gift purchased from her mother. My step daughter sees her mother 1x per week. For the last fourteen years....I have taken my step daughter to purchase Christmas gifts for her mother, step-father, half sister & half brother. Never once has her mom assisted her in response. I say be the bigger person and show your children the proper thing to do, even if their father does not repay the favor. As for your gifts...have your kids do stuff around the house or yard to earn some money. Then take them to Target or such to buy you something small, but thoughtful. My favorite gifts are the personal ones my kids make me at school. Teach your kids it is not the money cost, but the effort. Trust me...I will cherish the Christmas picture my daughter made in class much longer than any store bought gifts. It didn't work to reason with your ex while you were married. Why do you expect anything more when your divorced ???

Good Luck and Happy New Year !!!

Dear J. T,

I know how hard it is to keep doing what you think is best for the children, when it's not being reciprocated by your ex. There were many things my children didn't realize about their dad, but I knew it wasn't up to me to point out his failings; it would only leave the kids with feelings of resentment for both of us! It took a long time, but they finally came to their own conclusions and are now able to deal with their dad -- and they've acknowledged the efforts on my part to keep things on as even a keel as I could. The key was that I had to accept that I couldn't influence how their dad behaved.
That being said, here's a couple ideas about your situation. With your son being older, he appears to have learned how to set aside some money for whatever reasons he might have. Your daughter, being much younger, might need some guidance in this regard. Do your children get an allowance? If so, help your daughter save by agreeing on an amount to put aside. If they don't get an allowance, perhaps this is something you could start -- even if it's only a couple dollars a week. Not only is your daughter old enough to understand saving some money, both she and her brother can earn a little more by doing chores.

I hope this helps; you can only influence your children, not your ex. Good luck and hang in there! It takes time, but it's all worth it!

K.

I would love to say "quit buying the jerk a present" but then it puts the kids in the middle. It is bad enough your ex is doing that, you don't need to do that either. I would put a cap on the money (which you probably already do) and take them to buy him and his gf a present for x-mas and b-days and leave it at that. Maybe, if/when his gf becomes something more she will take the kids to buy you a gift.

Hi J.,

Sounds like we have some things in common. I have a clinical MSW and have been in mental health for a long time. I also have an ex-husband who has never once helped my 10 year-old son buy me a gift (we've been divorced 8+ years). It hurts! The way I have handled it is to have my son draw me a picture or make me a card, and I have told him that's enough. This has always worked for him although I still feel bothered by his dad's negligence, as I am concerned that my son will internalize unhealthy messages about how to treat me and women in general. This same issue was a problem in our marriage. It sounds like your son is handling it himself by pushing dad--good for him. You are definitely taking the high road by buying gifts for your ex. If you're tired of it, next time you may just have the kids make him a card or draw him a picture as well.

Best wishes, L.

Don't sweat the small stuff.

Hi J.- sounds like your ex, for whatever reason doesn't feel the holiday spirit where you're concerned (maybe he's decided he's not into it in general; not seeing your kids much can make you wish the holiday thing would go away entirely).
I would leave it alone; he'll not thank you for any advice on the subject, and the best model for the children is surely a parent who is deeply appreciative at this time of year (and unfortunately, the tone of your letter isn't quite that...) Good luck- Ruth in Sacramento

J., keep doing the "right" thing by getting presents from the children for him...Do not bother him about it, and tell your children that their love is all that is needed from them. They will appreciate the lessons from this experience when they get older...Trust me, on this one (although you do not know me) I wish I had done some thing differently with my former spouse and daughter...But experience has taught me much...

It seems to me by you not getting a present from your ex-husband mentally works more on you. If you feel this is happening, then just stop buying a xmas gift because more likely you may not be getting anything in return. I understand the good motive behind it with your children, but it seems, that your frustration & hurt is showing that your kids may see this. This is a personal choice that you are doing. Life is too short to get hurt over this matter. What is most important, I think, is that you express positive thoughts, words about your children's father thru out the year to them. Harboring grudges only makes life more depressing.

Positive Pacer....

Kudos to you for taking the high road! You are a thoughtful and caring person and you are teaching your children to follow your generous spirit at Christmas time! Unfortuanately I don't have any really inspiring advice regarding your thoughtless x-husband. I guess I would let it go. As your kids get older they will discover/remember and realize his true colors and they will definitely appreciate their mother even more:)

YES, kids need to learn it is not all about them! My son is 18 and my daughter is 15. Their father left when they were 4 and 7. I have always helped them buy something for their father for Christmas and his birthday. They now think about it on their own, most of the time, and sometimes are surprisingly more generous than their father is to them. BUT it doesn't flow in reverse:>) I never bugged him about doing the same for me because his girlfriend, now wife would help in that department, but now that she has her own kids with him she never does anything for or with mine. He never thought about helping them or prodding either, so there were many times that they didn't get something and then felt bad in the moment. I think because I expected them to do something for him they learned to give to him but because he didn't expect them to give to me they didn't always think that way. It is very important to help them and model what it is you want them to do. Good luck. Kat J.

It is very nice of you to think of your ex-husband. Know that your kindness does leave a wonderful example for the kids. If you can learn to think of the gift giving as a wonderful gift you are leaving for your children.....generosity, selfless giving, etc. then by all means continue, and with a change of your attitude, don't give it more thought. If it bothers you too much though, in my opinion only, you can maybe consider not getting him something that takes so much of your time or having the kids just make the gift at home with things around the house. I suppose in this world there are those who give and those who won't but it's wonderful to know at least one person in your family is generous and leaving that gift behind for your children is priceless in my opinion.

Lastly, if you can spare a few dollars, you can give each child a few and let them go shopping with you while you look at something else so they can get something for you. Don't peek and let them wrap it themselves when they get home. Happy Holidays!

I think you should continue your practice of helping the kids buy presents for dad. You are modeling thoughtful behavior. How about giving the kids extra spending money before your birthday or christmas and encouraging one of your relatives to take them shopping for you. Do you have a sister/brother/mother or close friend in town?

I think it is tricky to try to influence the behaviour of your ex. It might be hard to maintain a positive attitute about him and not appear too resentful in the eyes of your kids.
hope that helps

Hi there, this is just my opinion, but I too have an ex that we make sure we have something every year. But I do not expect the same. I had a friend last year take my kids 10 & 11. I took my friends kids this year because her husband passed away, so that she would have something under the tree. It is very important. I had my kids this year do chores all week and everyone got $15 we went wish shopping in Target. That way we all bought for eachother what we all wanted. So they bought for eachother and me. It was very cute and they loved giving because they earned it. No offense but it is time to cut the EX out of your thoughts! Give up on him, they will never change. Just be greatful you can teach your children your morals not his. Use your energy for the things you can improve and don't waste it. Just my thoughts. Have a happy new year and give your kids a hug!!
J. Jost

Kids are smarter than we give them credit for. It sounds like your older one has already got some great values, he is thinking about others. I would just keep doing as you are, lead by example. As they get older, they'll start to make up their own minds about who each of you are. Lead by example and they'll figure out their dad is a jerk. Good luck...and trust me- actions speak louder than words.

Happy Holidays!

I had the same experience many years ago when my husband and I divorced. I would recommend you stop spending your money on gifts for their father, and ask them what they would like to do other than to buy gifts. They will probably come up with some creative ideas, and if they do not, then Dad won't get any gifts.

It took me a while to realize that the kids relationship with their Father was theirs, and their relationship with me was ours, and I was not responsible for the health of their relationship with their Father. It freed me from feeling like I had to be the great teacher, and it freed my girls up to be creative. I recall one year that they did extra chores to earn money, which was used to buy gifts for both their father and me. It helped me to stop footing the bill, and it made them more responsible.

You cannot expect your ex-husband to think like you do.

And, yes, I would stop getting him a present with the kids. Leave it up to them to do the thinking and planning.

Stop buying him or his girlfriend gifts. You're right, it's not about money. And your children should not be made to feel inferior because they don't 'bring home the bacon to buy a gift for dad or for you'; especially a five year old. And don't expect your ex to change because he won't. Your kids can make things for both you and your ex. They can get inspired to save an allowance from doing chores. There are always great thrift stores (especially out here and especially for books). They are both at an age where creating something either in high school, kindergarten, an afterschool program, even time after school, summer camp, or a special interest class can be wonderful (the old lumpy ceramic ashtray or sugarbowl!). Or they can always make a card - just for you, heartfelt and in their own words.
You said it yourself and it really is true; it's not about the stuff. I'm almost 40 and my mother and my father both have kept various (hideous in my opinion!) items I've given them.

About me: a bay area adult child of divorced parents who loves giving them both gifts still to this day!

So I hate to be harsh, but here goes. I am with a man who has a child with another woman. He used to get her gifts for bday and xmas from his daughter every year. I even surprised her with a cake (me & her daughter made)and candles one year when she picked her up from our house on her bday. I later found out that she took this as his way of showing he was still in love with her. And forcing me to help proved she was more important than me. Now if we stop she will think it's because I'm intimidated of their relationship, but if we keep doing it she will continue thinking he has feelings that aren't there. I really wish we never put ourselves in the situation. The last thing you want is them two sitting around saying you mean something by this present thing. Especially if the gifts are thoughtful and obviously from you. I'm not saying this is the case, but it is realistic. Ex's and especially ex's with new girlfriends can be messy and petty and dramatized. I know I'm 20 years younger than you, but jealousy and immaturity come in every age. We now have his daughter make her something. Draw a picture or card herself so we're not "involved". I'll buy the supplies "she" asks for but it's all her. And if she doesn't want to that's her right to decide. If I were in your situation I would wait until they asked to get their dad something. Let your son pay for his and let the younger one make something. You can help them, but make it "their" thing. If THEY don't want to do that then they don't have to. I mean shoot, if he's not doing right by them, they have a right to express that. Maybe he needs to see that. As much as you would love to be mature about the situation, it doesn't mean they will be. It's probably becoming apparent to your son "what's going on" by this present thing. Your ex seems like the type of guy who will never change so in a sense you're setting him up to fail every year. Don't subject you yourself or your children to this type of behavior anymore by simply just cutting it out of the equation.

Hi J.,
I would let the kids make him something from them. Some cookies,Pictures or crafts. But as far as buying. Give your children the money and take them shopping so they can buy gifts for you and each other. I wouldn't ever expect an EX to responed to a kindness from the other ex unless they had a really good relationship. It rarely happens. As far as the childrens sake thing...Unless they asked you to do it, don't bother. Blessings~!

Hi J.... it sounds to me like your ex is still carrying a chip on his shoulder over the divorce? Either that or his is thoughtless and cheap, and does not concern himself over your feelings of being giftless on birthdays and holidays. I think that he's really rude to make your kids pay for your gifts,if they want to buy you something. But you are showing them a good example of gifting him, and that's what counts. I give you a pat on the back! and his girlfriend too? You're alot nicer than alot of other ex's. So... any Dollar Tree stores or 99cent stores in your area? That's where you should do your shopping for him from now on, because that's what he deserves. It's the thought that counts, right?! Anyhow, hope your Holidays were happy ones. CJ

If your Ex wants to be a jerk, leave him out of the process. Have another family member, friend, neighbor, whoever take the kids, and offer to reimburse the person for the gifts. Let that person know there is a $20 maximum (or whatever amount). Or you can have them make something for you (picture, card, ornament). Just keep reiterating to the kids that it is important to think of others and do nice things for others. They’ll pick up on what kind of person their dad really is. It’s a shame, but people are who they are and kids need to know that. You can always focus on your Ex’s better quality or at least tell them he loves them. As you know, it hurts the children far more than hurting your Ex if you bad mouth their dad.

I would say get big brother to help little sister make something for mom and explain that it is so she doesn't feel left out of the giving. This would help big bro get into the spirit of giving (not follow in Dad's example) and bond a little sister. Even if it's just a drawing or something out of clay, she will feel that spirit. I am grateful that my kids school does this thing called "Elf Day" where there are stations for making things. I got candles, dad got a shark tooth necklace.Brother got a potpurri pillow from sis and she got a little doll from him. It's a Waldorf tradition, but maybe your kid's school would take it on.
Good luck and Merry Christmas!

Don't bug him. Use this opportunity to teach your children about gifts - presents tokens of appreciation - that are material base. help her understand gifting giving to you should not be stressful. She can make things she cando special things to acknowledge you. She is young maybe you shoudl be sharing things with her about your life, telling her stories, celebrating your life with her.

Your son's got the picture. He can help the little sister.

My fourteen year old use to pick things out for me I paid for it and she wrapped it and that was my gift from her to me.

Don't let your ex- create anxiety in you and your children about money. It is power game.

It isn't about he money, the gift, it is the lesson on giving. He doesn't seem capable of teaching that lesson.
You teach it!

I have gone fourteen years without my ex ever buying a gift for me on behalf of our child.

I stopped buying gifts for my ex on behalf of daughter when she was about ten. I begin to teach her about making gifts, calling him up, spending time with him.

Funny yesterday was his birthday and my daughter called. I reminded her two days before. But I didn't think about it until today!

happy belated EX!!!