I would forget the mascara altogether and wear false lashes. The styles available today are very comfortable and natural looking. Some you can apply with the adhesive daily and others can actually be permanently put onto your lashes at upscale salons, they are called eyelash extensions.
I'm a stylist and used to do makeup in the past and a few clients had similar problems. One used the clear mascara for just a touch of help and it seemed to work for her, have you tried that?
Also, upper scale salons can do eyelash dyeing. I have done it before as well and it doesn't irritate the eyes as the color is specially formulated to be safe.
extensions/coloring:
http://tinyurl.com/2ew5726
Google salons in your area to see if they offer any of these services and go to a make-up counter at a depertment store and ask abut the lashes Some brands sell them, and some can be found at drugstores. Thse are the cheaper kinds and not as comfortable, but can give you an idea.
Also, what Bee's Mom said is true about losing the hair, but if your eyes are getting irritated and you have bald patches, then that is not our daily typical eyelash loss.
Now, if you are curling your lashes, sleeping with the mascara on, clumping it on, picking at them, rubbing your eyes or washing or wiping the mascara off with a harsher facial clenser (especially waterproof mascara), that could cause the fall out and irritation as well. If ou are not doing any of those things, than you are probably alergic to the filling in the mascara. Or, it could be an actual medical cause, called ciliary madarosis.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Madarosis
more tips:
http://beauty.about.com/cs/eyemakeup/a/luscious_lashes.htm
If you rally want to try mascara, yYou may want to try organic, all natural or even vegan masara that does not have fillers in it:
http://tinyurl.com/2453859
http://tinyurl.com/2453859
http://tinyurl.com/245p4az