Teenage Boys - Lynn,MA

D.,
Many studies show that eating together as a family helps all children stay out of trouble. You can also have them help you prepare the meal so they learn to cook.
We also have always attended church and hang out with other friends and families that share our beliefs. That way my boys have had things reinforced to them by other adults they respect.
I think it is so important for boys to have adult males in their lives that are good role models.
Hope this helps,
Victoria

Hello D.!
Just asking this question shows me you are an awesome mom! I also raised 2 teenage boys and a daughter by myself. Yes, church is a great place to begin. Also, mainly, lead by example. Period. They are watching you and know the kind of person you are. Yes, I agree with the other lady who asked if there were some good male role models they could spend time with.
Your 20 year old is pretty much raised, and mainly, your 13 year old...just know where he is at all times and trust your instinct. And pray together as a family. God bless you and good luck. Remember, "He who created a good work in you will surely finish it to completion."

Church. When my now 21 year old wanted to go to the youth group at 14 we jumped at the opportunity. This was another move and another church. He went on all sorts of youth trips and taught in the 2 and 3 year old class for three years.
Also we do things together. Do they have a male to bond with? Say a grandfather, uncle. My boys jump at any chance to go fishing with Grandpa, my hubby and I are still married but since he is always deployed somewhere I use whatever man figure I can, even neighbors.
Watch the tv shows they watch and comment on them and get their comments.
Keep an open mind when they say they are trying this or that. When my first tried beer and told me it was awful I didn't attack, he was 17, I just said yeah I dont' like beer either. This does not mean go along with their unhealthy decisions but if you keep a level head you will weather the storms better. PIck your battles, do they really have to have an immaculate room if they are staying out of trouble?
Offer the be the hang out house. Meet their friends and the friend's parents.
The best piece of advice I ever got was to love him through it. These are hard words when your son is really being a terd but in the end you just love him through it, even tough love.
Good luck.

As a mother of 3 boys and a girl. ages 21 to 13...You can not give them the right path. They have to chose it. and they will if you do your best to lead them there. Stay involved in what they do. Eat dinner with them and talk. Always ask them how their day went. Make sure they attend family gatherings. Even if it's Valentines Day at grandmothers house. Encourage them to help out their grandparents, or older aunts and uncles, or just visit with them. Family closeness teaches kids one of the best things in life. This is a missing link in society today.
Show them how much you care about them. Their relatives will too.
Good Luck! Keep those reins pulled tight for the ones that need it too. It will pay off in the long run.