What Can I Do - Fontana,CA

someone else suggested it. but I will confirm... GET ON SKYPE! my parents live in another state and we skype everyday! My son knows his grandma & papa and even plays games with them (peek-a-boo, and make silly faces). He actually seems emotionally closer to my parents through skype than he is with his grandparents that live 10 min away! He gets a little emotional with them when they come to visit and then leave but we still skype and by the next day he is usually right back into it!

She's grieving, just as she would if your mom had died (because in real terms, she has ceased to exist for your daughter)...

Look at the tips and suggestions for dealing with a child grieving.

It is normal for her to regress following a lot of stress, so the fact that she's turned back into a baby is just normal. Not a symptom of depression. She's far too young to have that kind of socialized response to rage.

I agree that your daughter is grieving. Becoming babylike is a natural way of asking for extra cuddling and tenderness – even many adults do a version of that in the face of heartbreaking loss.

Also, don't tell your daughter not to be sad. She has a right to her natural feelings, and will feel supported if you simply acknowledge, "Sweetie, you are feeling sad, aren't you? You wish Gran was still here. So do I. I wish I could bring her back for you. Here, give (stuffed toy) the hug you want to give Gran. And let me give you the hug Gran wants to give you.

Because your mom is still alive, it may help to establish as much contact as possible. Is she still near enough for visits? If not, use the telephone often. Your daughter may not be able to have intricate conversations yet, but just simple contact may mean a great deal to her.

Another helpful practice is to have your daughter help you make a photo album with family pictures, especially ones with her and her granny together. She can have a visit of sorts whenever she wishes.

My best to your family.

I agree with alot of the other moms. You can always get a web cam and sign up with a free account on Skype so she can see her when she talks to her. I may help a little.

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Sounds very normal, she misses Grandma! Can you take her to visit your mom, or invite your mom to visit for an afternoon/evening?

Trips to park are good, also read books, and just play with her, whatever she wants to do (even if it is rolling a ball back and forth for a half hour, etc).

But the best thing would be to maintain some contact with Grandma; as baby gets older she will realize that Grandma didn't die, she is just not at your house all the time anymore.

Good luck!

K. Z.

Awww....she misses her grammy. Can she talk to her on the phone every day? Send her a picture/card/drawing?

She will not go thru depression...Kids are resilient, she will feel sad for a long time, but eventually she will get used to the new situation again. Let her talk to grandma, visit often and remind her grandma (who she thinks was part of your family because she lived there is now "gone") is not gone forever. She didn't get the chance to "visit" grandma at another place (her house) like most kids, so the loss seem greater, but in time once she realizes grandma is not gone out of her life forever, she will adjust.

How far did Grandma move away Can you go see her on weekends?
I married my husband when my oldest was 4. We moved two hours away. For the sake of my son we took him home every weekend for about 4 months then every other weekend for a couple months then home for the summer, my hubby was in school, then new school year for my son and he was ready for the occasional visits to Gma and Gpa's or they would come to our house.
We treated it like a divorce settlement, without telling my son that is. My son is now 21 adn still the appple of my dad's eye. He is very close to my mom and dad and yes my mom still spoon fed him when he was 7. I'm sure she was sleeping with him while he stayed there too. He turned out OK.