How Do You Find Joy?

I had some pure just complete joy this past holiday season.
I don't typically do stuff that's very physical because I'm not able to and it's a real bummer with small kids.
So my family came up with a way to have me go sledding with them. I just had to hang on for dear life.
I have not laughed so hard in a long time. The deep belly laugh where you cannot stop. I ended up upside down with feet in air, in front of all these people and I could not stop laughing.
Best part of my vacation.
Doing something you don't think you can do - or making time for silly fun - for me always makes me fill with joy. Sharing those experiences with my family is the best.
For me, it's a lesson to not take life (or yourself) so seriously!

I guess I hear my mother's voice: Why focus on crappy stuff when there's beauty and humor and grace all around you every minute of every day, seems like such a waste (she shrugs), what is the point?

:)

**Wait, I don't want to make it sound like that's so Easy Peasy to do. It's not. But we DO all have that choice.

For me, joy is about noticing when I feel at peace with the world. A sense of well-being, a sense that everything is okay. I suppose it's less about a search and more about identifying and acknowledging that moment and being consciously grateful. Letting go, too, of disappointments, unrealistic expectations (of others and self) and finding my own sense of purpose are also integral to getting to that place. :)

To me what Margie described is pure joy. Those moments in life that are totally unscripted, organic and just come together in a random spontaneous way.

What I shoot for daily is peace and contentment. I find them in a good book (and time to read it), cooking, planting and growing, seeing the baby Red Fox we just watched trot through our back woods, listening to music with my girls, a fun night out with my husband, a walk on the beach, having lunch with an old friend or meditating and focusing on my breath.

I think pure joy will pop up in life a lot more often if you can achieve peace and be content in everyday life. I suppose as adults we are very blessed to experience pure joy now and then. Seems to come to children with such ease but as we age it's more elusive. Seeing my kids (or even other people's kids) feel joyful is almost as good as feeling it myself.

i find happiness in lots of things. sunshine and my mares and the boys and the ol' man and my cats and good food and good books and on and on.
but true joy is deeper and rarer. occasionally it happens in connection with others, but by far it happens mostly when i'm alone, and very quiet. i usually try too hard, but when i can let myself float lightly on the surface of my awareness and yet let the connections expand, magic happens. i become conscious of my own little strand of glory in the vast web of creation, and how it connects intrinsically to everything from the grains of earth under my feet to stars being born in distant nebulae, and how deeply and personally i'm loved.
i always think, when it happens, 'NOW i get it! i'm going to hang onto this!'
but other than knowing it's always possible, it doesn't stay. and the very act of questing for it makes it slip away.
but it's so breathtakingly exciting knowing that it's there.
very hard to explain. but really, the whole point of life.
:) khairete
S.

I read and enjoy quiet.
I garden, and enjoy finding toads and watching/listening to birds.
I sometimes take long hot baths while sipping a glass of wine.
Joy isn't something you find in a store - it's not about spending money.
It's not external - you find it inside yourself.

Joy comes from within. You are responsible for making your own happiness.

Try a class or take up a hobby. Do something you have wanted to try and learn from it good or bad. Take a walk outside and enjoy the beauty of nature all around you. Listen to the birds, feel the wind on your face with the sun and the peacefulness. Let go of all the worries of today and just be in the minute.

Find the inner peace and go from there. Watch a child discover something for the first time and remember when you were that age and reflect back to that joy of amazement.

I like to garden, cook, sew and craft and it gives me great pleasure and self-satisfaction.

Good luck to you.

the other S.

PS Life is too short to get all upside down. I am a cancer survivor two time and I look at the world differently then many as I enjoy life as it is and don't sweat the small stuff.

I am not sure anyone can help you. Just my observations but I see people who have everything that should make them happy and they couldn't find joy with a troop of boy scouts helping them. I have also seen people with no reason to be joyful and they are.

Personally for me it is experiencing negative very briefly and then moving on and being happy again. I mean, don't dwell on the negative.

I find the most joy when I am not wishing I could change the past or trying to control the future... My best moments are the simplest, like when I take a ride with my family and we grab a hot chocolate and look around at the scenery and talk.. Or when it's early morning and still dark out.... particularly when we had that last full moon at Christmas, in the early morning, when the moon shone so brightly in my living room window. It was as though it was there just for me... I love having a homemade meal and sitting around the dinner table and talking our day... Or when I have a good book that keeps me enthralled for days... which most recently, Sherman's Alexie's, Blasphemy did.... I feel joy when on the weekends, my neighborhood is so peaceful... I just soak in the silence.. I also find joy in gardening and taking long walks throughout the city with my son.. I guess I am simple and find joy in what might seem like little things.... but to me, so far, they have been the biggest aspects of joy in my life..

I focus on the positive. Be happy with what you have and you will have plenty to be happy about. I find joy in my family, in nature, in a glass of wine, in a good book, in a movie, a warm bath, a quiet moment, a good meal...

Being out in nature brings me joy. Walking along a snowy trail in silence. Skiing quietly through the woods. Watching my kids jump off tree stumps or collecting rocks. Breathing in the fresh air.

Things that bring me joy: Being with my kids, hanging out with Hubby, being with friends, doing my job (most days), reading a good book, binge watching something on Netflix, going to my weekly Mom's Bible study group, sitting on my porch with a cup of coffee.....

Great advice from Margie.

I don't do it much, I'm always running around like a chicken with my head cut off, but I believe in experiencing the moment (like Margie did). Check out The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle; "mindfulness" is the new catchphrase. Even though I rarely do it, I do believe being in the moment is the root of joy.

Also, having a passion/goal you are working toward. Some kind of project or goal you are excited about that you can work toward every day.

If I'm "lacking", nothing brings it back faster than being outside and counting my blessings.

By being present and at home in your breath.....by feeling our interdependence and connection. By feeling compassion. By being Present.

When I'm present and at home, there is nothing but joy. Even the other day when arguing with hubby, I felt joy because I was present and aware. I knew he had to be hurting to be saying mean things, and I was able to just be there. Never before had I been calm and at peace in a heated disagreement. But I was just present and there.

It's those moments when we let go of everything and just be. In there is pure joy and happiness. You feel one with existence and thereby whole.

Start with eliminating the things (and people) who distract you from joy. They are the negative influences in your life, those that do nothing but complain, and that which prevents you from being the person you want to be.

Live in the moment. You can not enjoy now if you are obsessing over the past or wrapped up in the future. That is not to say do not plan or reminisce, but be present when life is happening.

Look on the bright side. There was a study that showed that there was little difference in the lives between people who thought that they were lucky vs unlucky, just how they viewed their life.

And lastly, realize while you might enjoy material things, Joy comes from within. Buying clothes will never replace accomplishing a goal. A new car is not a substitute for a long conversation with a good friend.

You already have it. It is in the moments as they happen. Joy is right now and all you have to do is notice.

Many people think joy is something that you chase or that comes from external means. True joy can not be caught or manufactured. Some people have everything they ever thought they wanted and are still miserable. They spend life thinking, "If only X then Y." and get nothing better than fleeting happiness, followed by dissatisfaction. They don't notice Now because they are too busy looking into the future.

Hard work in my yard.

Your joy is just that...yours. For advice, I started to find joy when I started saying no. No to volunteering and then being resentful because it is ALWAYS the same small group of us. No to my kids begging me to buy this or drive me there. No to my extended family's insistence that I must plan get togethers and reunions, now I can just attend. You find joy in being content. What relaxes you? What makes you unwind? Do more of that. Good Luck!