I am tied in knots over this decision...I have an opportunity to go to a convention that is out of state and I will not have to pay for gas, because we have a ride with another family, I would not have to pay for lodging because it has been offered to us as well/ guest house of a friend. Anyhow, the problem is it is pretty far away ( out of state) and I will not have my own car and I will be at the convention from 9 am to 5 pm with a recently turned 4 year old and a 10 year old. I am not worried about the 10 year old, I know she would do great...but I am worried about how the 4 year old will do. My 4 year old does relatively well at meetings that last between 2 and 3 hours, but I cannot imagine how he will do at the convention, and the convention is 3 days in a row.
Reasons I would like to go? I would have an opportunity to see someone I care about get baptized and that is a once in a lifetime event, I would also get to know a family who has helped me out in many ways a lot better.
Reasons I am scared to go, basically my 4 year old...whether he will be too restless and I certainly do not want him to be miserable.
I know part of this is my own social anxiety working against me as well, I get nervous at the idea of going new places and meeting new people, and if I found out after the first day that my son was miserable I would be stuck...as of right now, I am just leaning towards this is not a good time and next year will be easier. But I also feel like I am letting friends down by not going.
Any ideas moms? Should I take a chance and go? Should I stay home...I will say it does get a little more complicated, my SO would prefer if we did not go...he told me I was an adult and I could make my own decisions but he really thought the kids were too young ( we do not see eye to eye on religious beliefs) the trip over laps SO's beginning of his vacation which he does not choose when he goes on vacation, it is once a year and during plant shut down. He was not happy that we would not be home and would miss two days of his vacation and pointed out that I am the one who always complains he never spends time with us...so frustrated and hate feeling pulled in two directions.
Jehovah's Witness's do not separate children into different groups for meetings and Bible study. Children are expected to sit quietly. Alex does great at meetings, but he is not used to longer than 3 hours. Children are definitely welcome and expected, all the families I know from our Hall will be there with their children, but as far as I know at the convention there is no "quiet" room, only hallways and you can hear the talks and follow along in the hall if necessary.
We do not have plans for my SO's vacation, but I have decided we will stay home this year and might try for next year. There will be other conventions closer to home as well, I am fairly certain there is one in the fall that will only last two days.
The convention starts on Friday and we would have to leave on Thursday and my SO does not get done with work until Sat AM because he works nights. My SO would not want to attend and I have never been away from my children for longer than one night so going without them was never an option.
Thank you for all the advice, it did help me to feel more comfortable with the decision not to go.
I think the time with SO is more important.... he doesn't get to plan when he takes his vacation, and you would be missing out when he is willing to spend the time with you and the kids.
Hmmm. Well, having read your last paragraph, my opinion changed on what you should do. I was going to suggest you go, but since it is during your SO's vacation, I really think you should choose to stay home. This is your family. Granted, you will be missing out on a fun time with friends, but he is your SO, and spending time with him should weight heavier on the scale than your friends.
1. It sounds like this convention is not set up for children to attend. If it's not, that means they are not invited, don't bring them.
2. I don't understand how you could even begin to think that a 4 yo would sit still, be quiet, and entertain himself for 8 hours. What about the other attendees? If I was at an adult covention, I would not want a child distracting me.
3. SO and vacation? He would be coming with you? He couldn't watch the kids while you're at the convention?
IMO forget about this convention. Stay home and enjoy your family time. However, if this is a convention that is set up for children and has activities for them to particpate in while you're at other events, then you need to rethink this.
If it were me, I wouldn't go:-) I would want to be there with my hubby (or SO).
id say stay home and wait until next year when your youngest is more used to being up all day (if you are doing public school) so he is less likely to be miserable and maybe your husband could go as well
Wait till next year.
Don't go - spend the time with your SO, family is important and him knowing that you value him is going to go a long way.
That is my .02.......
there is always, 'next year' for SO and this church convention. go ahead and go. take the 4yr old. take books, color books and snacks, im sure the people ur going with well help out. i hate reading, 'oh no dont take a child so young'. as if it were a hinder to society. if child gets bored take him outside for a walk, most kids fall asleep, mine did on these church convention thingies, lol.
Aside from the part with the SO, I would say go and bring a lot of toys for you younger kid if he gets bored. I have many times taken one or the other of my kids to a weekend long convention. Usually it is 2 adults and 1 kid and even so we don't see a lot of the convention activities (less than half of what I would get to do child free). But my kids are much younger--currently 2.5 and 5. Also we go to the same conventions most years and know a lot of folks at them, including friends with similar age kids and a teenage who will babysit. Usually the 5 year old stays with my parents but we have brought him on occasion--he is a handful, that's his personality. bottom line, you could go but it is going to be work for you. Can you work out childcare for your younger one so he stays home? Does the convention have kids' programing or childcare? It depends on how much you want to go.
I fell like it's 2 days of his vacation. Not the whole thing. Did you have actual plans? I know for me, husband would not have any "plans" anyway so I wouldn't be missing anything.
If this is a convention that includes kids, won't there be child care and activities for the 4 year old?
I'd go.
