Mixed Race Couples and Dealing with Racism !

Here in the US it really depends on where you live. I would love to say that things like that never happen here, but that would be a lie. I just wish people would just live and let live! and leave other people the hell alone.

I'm in California and mixed race couples, gay couples, any kind of families are completely accepted where I live. I love the diversity. Sorry you are going through this!

Oh B., that sucks.

Give me your address and you know I'll hop the pond and kick all their filthy asses!

:(

I am terribly sorry you are going through this. My husband is black, I am white. We honestly have never really experienced any racism. Maybe a few looks her or there, but most people tell us we make a beautiful couple or family when our son is present. I guess where we live, there are all sorts of mixed race relationships so people are used to seeing it now.
I sincerely hope that these men are punished and will leave you alone. Its absolutely absurd they would act like that.

You poor thing!! That's horrible.
Yes, there is racism in American towards interracial couples, but I think the severity depends on where you live. Some parts of the country are better than others. I have also found that it depends on the generation. The older generations tend to be less tolerant.

I haven't had it as bad as you. The worst I've recieved are dirty looks from older Asian people. I'm white and my husband is Japanese. Some older Asians don't like it when younger Asians mix with other races. They say it's "tainting the blood". Even my mother-in-law was a tiny bit disappointed that my husband was marrying outside the Asian race. But I quickly won her over with my practice of Japanese culture and skill of sewing. tee hee...

The younger generations are a lot better with it. Especially the Japanese. They find HAPAs very appealing now. (HAPA is a cute term meaning "half" or "mixed blood".)

Stand strong B.. They say interracial couples are becoming more and more common all over the world. We've come a long way, but still have a long trek ahead of us. I wish you the best!!!

B.,

Your husband should NOT go out when a number of men are outside your house...It's not safe, they could have a gun or knife and/or gang up on him. You are right to call the authorities and they should be driving by your home on a regular basis for the next few weeks.

In addition, install some cameras in places where they won't be seen by these cowards. Once you have some proof and turn it over to the police, they may be able to identify the vandals and get them off the streets. In addition to photos of the people if the camera could get a shot at a license plate that would be very helpful.

Have you asked your neighbors to keep a watch for unusual activities? Have you considered holding a "Neighborhood Watch" meeting in your home" You might be surprised that most of your neighbors will be there for you.

Blessings.....

Im not in a mixed race relationship but I have several friends that are. None of my friends have ever exeprienced kicking in doors, or having their house egged. Thats just horrible.
I'm sorry you're going through that, it sounds abosolutely horrid. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers..I hope these men are caught and it doesn't go even farther then it already has.

I LOOOOOVE Theresa N.'s response. I'll come with her!

B., I am horrified for you! I cannot imagine what you are going through. My husband and I are both white (well, kind of a peachy color, as my son says) but we have several friend who have interracial marriages and at least 2 of them have not dealt with ANY racism.

My friend and her husband are 24 years apart in age difference, and have suffered horrible judgement. More so than the mixed race couples. Isn't it sad that people are so closed off to something different than they chose for themselves?

B., you and your lovely family will be in my prayers. I pray that you stay safe!

Added* Um, Jo G. did it ever occur to you that our B. might be Irish? Stating that your grandma hated the Irish isn't helping the predjudice issue.

I am so very sorry, that is absolutely absurd. I am white, my hubby black, my kids are both :D I really hope things settle down, it is so crazy to me that people anywhere think it is weird for any man and woman who aren't related or married to someone else, to get married. I mean really, who do they think they are, God? My husband and I live in a big city that is such a melting pot but if we go a little more South, yeah the racism is alive and well, heck even some smaller cities up North. I am grateful that Houston is a good place to live in this regard, I know I have some family members in the South who probably don't approve, but it doesn't touch me directly. When we first were married we did notice some looks, so one day we walked out of a store, took each other by the hand and said out loud that we did not care and we were going to never notice it again. And it may sound crazy, but we never do! Now under the threat of violence, that is a different story. I thought other countries were more progressive, shows what I know! Marriage is enough of a challenge at times without others heaping their issues on it! I wish you the best, I'm really sorry that you are dealing with all this. Hang in there....

That's awful:( The older I get, the more racism I seem to notice. But, getting back to your question, my lifelong friend is Asian and she is married to a Caucasian. She has experienced much racism in school, work, and in public as long as I've known her. It's been hard for her and I often wish that those who are racist would just see her for her character, not her race.. Since the internet has become such a big thing in the past 20 years, I read many politcal blogs and I am appauled at the comments people post. It may not be in your face racism, but it does exist in their hearts and hence, in their words. I also listen to talk radio and I get appauled at the things people say. My hubby and I are American. My hubby works for a European company and you would not believe how many times he's heard the term, "stupid Americans" from his European counterparts. Racism is alive and it's not going away. As long as there are differences, there will exist some form of racism, sadly.

I am from Hawaii.
Here, mixed race people are COMMON.
It just is.
My kids are mixed race.
The majority of people in Hawaii are mixed race. Bi-racial or multi-racial.
We all, have a great culture here of cultural and Ethnic mingling.
Sure some people are narrow minded. But it is not the majority here.

Hawaii, is progressive in not batting an eye at other ethnicities or races.
And in that way, we are unique, compared to all the other 49 States.

We do not experience racism here personally nor my kids.
My Husband did however, because he is from Europe. So that is a kind of racism per Nationality. Not ethnicity.

Racism, is not the same as being Prejudiced against a "Nationality."

People, are prejudiced, against "Nationality." Too.

I personally, experienced Racism, just in California and other parts of the Mainland.
But did not experience that in Europe.
I've traveled a lot in my life.

Oh B., I am sorry, what ever the reason is for this attack it must have being scary. Please be careful and get to know close your neighbors, hopefully they are good neighbors and would also offer some help if you ever need it, hopefully is not the case and this was only stupid teens.
I have get some mild stupid racist comments, most of them from my husband family but nothing compare to that, and yes, I think in here (USA) is a lot more of acceptance.
Take care.

Wow, you need to move to northern California. No one will even blink at a mixed race couple here. Look me up if you do.

I'm really sorry that you are going through this. Unfortunaley, in this day and age, ppl are still so closed minded. The important thing is that you and your husbands love for eachother is strong and unconditional. I hope that the ppl doing this to you guys will be in some sort of trouble with the law.

OH MY WORD!!!!

I'm with Theresa N - give us your address and we'll come take care of the problem for you!!

As long you bleed RED you are a human and race should NOT matter ONE BIT!!!

Oh sad that it's grown men who are acting like children!

I have not seen it in houston. But there are so many mixes here. Okla and kansas is not so accepting. But they won't vandalize your house. Some will call you names but vandalisim didn't happen. and what was wierd in okla and kansas it depended on the mix of the marriage. White and indian was ok. white and mexican was ok white and black wasn't. I never figured that one out. Too me there was no diffrence. Attacking someone cause they are mixed race marriage is just wrong. Sorry they are doing you wrong. So I guess it depends on where you live in america.

I am in with theresa n she is my girl :)

that is terrible! yes, there is racism still here, but i don't think it often tips over into this degree of domestic terrorism.
PLEASE ask your husband not to go out and confront these criminals by himself. call the authorities.
invest in some surveillance cameras. when these cowards figure out that you mean business, they may decide to go find something else to do.
i'm so sorry you and your family are putting up with this, B.. i have romantic glorious visions of ireland and hope to visit it one day. this definitely tarnishes the pretty picture.
khairete
S.

Wow-how sad is that! I have not heard of that kind of behavior from my mixed race couple friends. So much for Europe being more 'progressive' than us-as many would like us all to believe.

I just wanted to send you hugs! How awful for you guys. I was in a serious mixed race relationship but we did not end up married...but we did experience quite a bit of racism...and we were in college! It wasn't so much our peers but mostly older people and it was really hard. I can't imagine how painful it would be to be at this stage in your life with a husband and kids and be subjected to this violence. It's just awful. I do hope that you have some support from friends and family and I really hope the police were responsive!

It is and it isn't mattering on the area and the gender. I have notice that women are much more likely to be prejudice about it than men are. I have a girlfriend (she is "white") that looses so many "friends" when people meet her husband (who is "dark"). I knew several darker women that would be royally pissed that a dark man would marry a white woman (in fact they would comment that all the white women would get the dark men that were worth anything... ) and white women that would be pissed that a black woman would be married to a white man (and how he must be some sort of skank in the bed to get him or some other such nonsense!) but I have never seen a man be pissed about it. I really don't get it.

I've lived and traveled all over the US (and EU and SE Asia)...

In the states... It depends on where you are.

In certain places... yes there is quite a lot of violent racism. In other places, it's been unheard of for over a generation. Seattle, for example, it's fairly common for highschool students to deny that racism or sexism even *exists* anymore (anywhere... sigh). It's one of those things (having traveled extensively in this country and elsewhere) that just blows my mind.

In general, big cites are the most relaxed, as is the West Coast in general... while small towns all over and the "deep south"/bible belt are the most prone towards racism. HOWEVER... there are pockets in every area that go in either direction. There are also pockets of "reverse" racism... where people actively seek out minorities (race, sexual orientation, etc.) and biracial couples to "add to their set" not based on actually liking the couple, but because the couple is out of the norm.

It can be a hard thing to quantify here in the states... because we are SO large. Certain individual communities/neighborhoods can get really bad (being latin in a black neighborhood, being white in a latin neighborhood, etc.) can be very very dangerous. These are typically neighborhoods that have a lot of gang activity.

Yes, it is much more acceptable here. In some smaller deep southern areas, they aren't as progressive and kind of not as accepting towards anyone, really, but mostly it's much better than what you are experiencing. I know several mixed race couples who haven't had any problems.